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I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t)
- Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
- Lu par : Lauren Fortgang
- Durée : 10 h et 44 min
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Description
The quest for perfection is exhausting and unrelenting. We spend too much precious time and energy managing perception and creating carefully edited versions of ourselves to show to the world. As hard as we try, we can't seem to turn off the tapes that fill our heads with messages like, Never good enough! and What will people think?
Why? What fuels this unattainable need to look like we always have it all together? At first glance, we might think its because we admire perfection, but that's not the case. We are actually the most attracted to people we consider to be authentic and down-to-earth. We love people who are real; we're drawn to those who both embrace their imperfections and radiate self-acceptance.
There is a constant barrage of social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. Everywhere we turn, there are messages that tell us who, what, and how were supposed to be. So, we learn to hide our struggles and protect ourselves from shame, judgment, criticism, and blame by seeking safety in pretending and perfection.
Based on seven years of ground-breaking research and hundreds of interviews, I Thought It Was Just Me shines a long-overdue light on an important truth: Our imperfections are what connect us to each other and to our humanity. Our vulnerabilities are not weaknesses; they are powerful reminders to keep our hearts and minds open to the reality that we're all in this together.
As Dr. Brown writes, "We need our lives back. It's time to reclaim the gifts of imperfection - the courage to be real, the compassion we need to love ourselves and others, and the connection that gives true purpose and meaning to life. These are the gifts that bring love, laughter, gratitude, empathy and joy into our lives."
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
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- Client d'Amazon
- 30/09/2020
Very educational
My life was changed for the better thanks to this book. Never did I think that I actually practiced those knee-jerk reactions of fight-fright-flee when exposed to my "shame triggers".
Thank you Brené for your dedication to the study of shame and for sharing the result.
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- Leslie A Hill
- 09/08/2011
I'm sure its great if you are a mother ....
I'm sure this book has a lot to offer to most women; unfortunately not so much for me. Most of the book focuses on motherhood and parenting.. I don't have children, so could not relate a good deal of the time and lost interest.
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398 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Sherry
- 01/09/2013
Missing Brene's own Vulnerability Voice
If you are one of the squillions who have watched Brene Brown on TedTalks or Oprah's Super Soul Sunday you may empathize with my review. I missed hearing the book narrated by Brene Brown herself. Lauren Fortgang's effort was not without merit, however after having been engaged by watching Brene then buying the books I missed her delivery of her own words.
The book itself was worth the investment, I've listened twice since purchasing.
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230 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Justyna
- 02/01/2017
Interesting but not for me
Definitely there were parts that I appreciated for being insightful and explaining things, soon the book became pretty boring and repetitive as it constantly circled around the issues of parenting and family.
I'm in my mid 20s, I'm still a student, and I have no interest in creating a family, let alone having children. A lot of the examples and discussions in the book simply weren't for me. I might re-visit it in 10-15 years when it becomes more relevant. That's really the only thing about this book that dissatisfied me, and of course that's a very subjective reason.
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154 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Stacey
- 23/07/2012
Good self-help book; not well-suited for audio.
I thouroughly enjoyed Brené Brown's TED talks on vulnerability and shame; I had hoped that this book would be an expansion on those discussions by the author.
This book contains a lot of useful information and interesting anecdotes regarding overcoming shame, embracing reality, and having compassion for oneself and others. However, it is not written in a style that works well with audio. It contains many parts that I would just skim in a print book; it has reader exercises that would be more useful in a visual format; and there are parts that I would like to mark, think about, and come back to (not ealily done in this audio format).
A critique of the material is that it seems to focus primarily on women like Brown, herself: white, educated, mid-upper income, etc. Though there is a nod here and there to people who are not in those categories, it is pretty clear that this book does not do much to address the broader experience of people outside Brown's comfort zone. Then again, the audience that actually buys self-help books like this is primarily comprised of women, white, educated, mid-upper income, etc. (including me).
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147 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Dara Burwell
- 13/03/2016
Important points, anemic delivery
What was most disappointing about Brené Brown’s story?
This book makes a number of interesting and relevant points. Unfortunately it’s not a smooth read/listen – it is much longer and more repetitive than it needs to be. The book has the appearance of something that was adapted from a thesis, but wasn’t rearranged to be reader friendly. I think that Brown’s evaluation of shame vs. humiliation vs. embarrassment is very important. I just wish it had been more clearly conveyed.
Did Lauren Fortgang do a good job differentiating all the characters? How?
Fortgang did a good job narrating this book. She sounded compassionate and sincere, and conveyed the emotion that I think Brown intended.
Any additional comments?
I believe the book could have been streamlined. Sharpening the points and examples and making the book about half the length would have made it far stronger.
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116 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Max:Wang
- 29/07/2017
Didn't think it was just women (but it is)
Didn't get any indication that this book was exclusively about women. The author is pretty much only talking about women's contexts and its often difficult to relate or even remember why I'm listening. The book itself is great, a lot of good information and good work in here but the title or subtitle should have said something about the book being specifically relevant for women.
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65 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- THoward
- 24/02/2015
The last book
Any additional comments?
I have a friend who is always saying he is looking for his last book, meaning something so good and powerful that searching for another perspective is not worth the time. I suggested I have found the last author, but not the last book. Brene Brown is moving, enlightening and so real. I have re-read her books several times. I feel like I was swallowed up as a broken soul and soothed until I could stand on my feet again. I'm not alone, I'm not perfect, I'm just me. I learned that practicing what I believe means loving myself and those around me for who they are, not what they are. Practicing each day means making my life fulfilling and happy. Practicing the art of loving without constraint, without parameters, without any restriction at all is what I want in my life. WOW! Incredible author.
I started with The Gifts of Imperfection. I listened 3 times (in a row no less!) and I have given away 20 copies of the book.
I suggest that if you are looking for your last good book then you have found your last author instead.
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62 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- E. McNair
- 12/02/2017
Every time I think she's shown me at all…
I have read three of Brene Brown's other books before I read this one. I had no idea how much this one would change how I felt. In some ways I wish I had read this one first, but at the same time having already dabbled in her theories I was more familiar with what she was talking about. I will forever be changed from reading this book.
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47 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Tracer McLeod
- 12/12/2012
Required Reading for Humankind
Would you listen to I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t) again? Why?
I will most certainly listen again for the insight and information. But the narration should've been done by the author.
What was the most compelling aspect of this narrative?
The story-like writing style
What do you think the narrator could have done better?
She did fine; I've just heard the author in interviews and I prefer the timbre of her voice.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
Towards the end the author begins discussing her new research with men. While women seem to be caught in a web she finds that men are put in a box and punished when they try to escape. It reminded me of when my little brother started getting teased and bullied when he got too old (7 or 8 years old) not to stay in the box. Broke my heart again.
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40 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Kari
- 06/11/2011
Love the book, not the narrator
Brene Brown is brilliant and i LOVE this book. But having heard her speak, and knowing her drawl and cadences made the narration feel somewhat jarring. It would have been fabulous is Dr. Brown had done the narration, but really, when would she have had the time? That said, this is one of her most wonderful writings and I would highly recommend it!
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37 personnes ont trouvé cela utile
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- Utilisateur anonyme
- 15/07/2020
A book to listen two or three times
Social psychology made simple. We often don't know why do we act, feel or think in a specific way. We often don't realize which hidden emotions, thoughts or experiences are driving us.
I listened this book two times and things become more and more clear the more often one is listening to it.
I wasn't aware which huge impact shame has in our society. I used this word rarely.
The book opened my eyes and it made me aware to take a closer look to my own actions and behaviour.
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- LG
- 10/02/2021
Die Sprecherin hat für mich versaut :(
Wenn man eines der Bücher von Brené Brown gehört hat, mit Brené selbst als Erzählerin, ist dieser Titel einfach nur nervig.
Dazu kommt noch, dass hier leider wenig Neues drin ist. Langsam komme ich auf die Vermutung - einmal gehört ist fast alles gehört.
Klar, als Wiederholung ist es Prima. Ich meine für alle, wir können diese Lektion nicht oft genug wiederholen.
Dennoch, von allen Brene Brown Büchern, die ich bisher gehört habe, war dieses das schlechteste. Es wäre VIEL besser, wenn Brene weiterhin ihre eigenen Geschichten erzählen würde, oder wenn man versuchen würde, die Stimme mit jemandem abzustimmen, der die gleiche lebendige, warme Art zu sprechen hat wie Brene selbst. Dieser Erzähler ist kalt und versucht, klinisch zu sein. Das hat mir nicht gefallen.
Wenn dies Ihr erstes Hörbuch von Brene Brown ist, sollte Sie das nicht abschrecken, da Sie keinen Bezugspunkt haben. Sie sollten einfach nur zuhören, und zwar sehr genau, was gesagt wird. Es gibt hier einige sehr gute Weisheiten.
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1 personne a trouvé cela utile
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- Laura
- 09/03/2017
amazing insights
In my opinion think every person should read this book. It's about compassion and for me it also tells a lot about feminism and gender equality. I think everybody can use some of the indights and advice in this book.
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