Offended on Purpose: How Culture Turns Hurt Into Identity (and Children Into Enforcers)
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Offended on Purpose: How Culture Turns Hurt Into Identity (and Children Into Enforcers)
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What if the reason you’re offended… isn’t because something was truly harmful —
but because you were trained to be offended?
In this episode of The Things We Teach Without Thinking, Instructor Mike breaks down how emotional offense isn’t always instinct — sometimes, it’s inheritance.
From homes to classrooms to culture at large, too many children are taught to:
• Feel disrespected before understanding
• React before reflecting
• And wear their hurt like a badge of honor
When offense becomes identity, emotional reactivity becomes survival. And that creates a dangerous cycle — one where children grow up to become emotional enforcers, punishing others for pain they were never taught to process.
Backed by insights from Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett and Dr. Batja Mesquita, this episode uncovers:
• How emotions like offense are constructed, not automatic
• How culture scripts our emotional responses
• And how we can teach the next generation to process pain without personifying it
Offense doesn’t make you powerful.
Processing does.
Family Matters with Instructor Mike — because we don’t just feel things. We teach them.
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