Okay, grab your wine, your tea, your snack — whatever makes you cozy — because you are NOT ready for the story Jeff Luther is about to tell. This guy survived literal near-death, like “heart stopped, flatlined, dead for eight minutes” kind of near-death. And somehow, instead of coming out bitter or broken, he came out with a superpower: a brand-new perspective on confidence, vulnerability, and connection.

We’re talking about a man who went from running 50Ks and feeling unstoppable to being told, “Hey buddy, your heart’s dangerous. Don’t move too much or you could die.” And yes, that’s terrifying. But Jeff didn’t just survive physically — he came out thinking, feeling, and acting differently in ways that any of us can learn from, even if our worst day doesn’t involve flatlining.

What I loved about Jeff is how real he is about fear and vulnerability. He had to confront what he was afraid to face — not just for himself but for his teenage son, who witnessed parts of this. Jeff’s story is raw, human, and honestly, a little scary, but it’s full of nuggets about how confidence isn’t just a skill, it’s a survival tool.

Confidence isn’t the result of something dramatic happening. Jeff will be the first to tell you that it’s a choice (sound familiar?). This conversation may be heavy in some places, but it’s also hopeful because Jeff proves that even small shifts in our mindset and also showing up for others — vulnerably, genuinely — actually builds your confidence in ways you don’t expect.

Key takeaways from our conversation include:

• How leaning into honesty with yourself and others builds real, resilient confidence.
• The ways gratitude literally rewires your brain.
• What it means to connect when life is hard. Whether it’s a near-death moment or just a tough conversation with your teen, showing up fully strengthens your confidence and relationships simultaneously.
• How to flip fear into agency.
• The role mindset plays in shaping recovery and growth.

Jeff Luther is a seasoned entrepreneur and fitness enthusiast who has overcome significant health challenges, including a life-threatening heart condition. With over 25 years of experience in business and a passion for inspiring others, Jeff utilizes his journey to motivate individuals facing their own adversities. He shares valuable insights on resilience, gratitude, and the importance of human connection. You can learn more about Jeff Luther at jeffluther.com.

The American Confidence Institute (ACI) is 10 years old. Ten. Years. And honestly, I had to sit with that for a second—like, wait, what?

The last decade has been a sports bra-required ride. Confidence has been tested for me, for you, for all of us. Back in 2015, when I talked about the amygdala, people looked at me like I was speaking Greek (which technically it is—it means almond, the shape of that brain part). Or maybe they thought I was casting a spell from Harry Potter. Now, brain science is practically pop culture.

And can we agree that “fake it till you make it,” counting to five, or power posing doesn’t actually work? You can’t breathe your way past fear or plaster on a smile and call it confidence.

Those tricks help calm your amygdala so you can think instead of react, but real confidence takes more. It takes doing the inner work. It takes deciding how you want to respond when your brain yells, “This is uncomfortable.”

Over the years, we’ve cycled through emotional regulation and emotional intelligence—both good, both useful—but the core lesson remains: your brain freaks out when it feels unsafe. Turning those warnings into signals helps you make better, more rational, confident choices. You can’t control others’ reactions—their experiences and emotions belong to them—but understanding and managing your own brain gives you an edge.

Confidence, really, is deciding again and again how you want to show up. The more you practice that awareness—recognizing your thoughts, feelings, and signals—the more you rewire your brain. That’s neuroplasticity in action: building the habits that make confidence your default. You start creating automatic responses you’ll be proud of later, not ones that make you think, “Crap, that was not my finest moment.”

So here we are. ACI at 10, me at 60. The data says confidence peaks around now, and I can confirm—it checks out.

It’s not about how you look or sound. It’s about being who you truly want to be. It’s about making your mark with the colors and fonts you like no matter what others think. It’s about making positive, productive impact. Are you leaving things better than you found them?

As a parent, educator, wife, friend, daughter—and yes, as a podcaster—I hope your world feels a little happier and a little more confident because I’m in it. It certainly does for me, because you’re in mine.

For this anniversary episode, we’re diving into where we’ve been, what’s changed, and what’s finally starting to click.

This past summer, my husband and I traveled to Croatia with a fantastic tour group. We’re sitting on a restaurant patio, sipping something ridiculously overpriced, when I meet a young psychiatrist on the tour. Freshly minted, very professional, very brainy… but, and I mean this with zero judgment, clearly on the spectrum. She wore the same outfit every day—just switched colors—and had that classic social awkwardness. Not a bad thing at all—just noticeable. Her vibe? Endearingly, unmistakably her own.

Then comes dinner. We’re all chatting, and suddenly—bam—she jumps up, grabs ice cream from a vendor, and plops it on her plate. No comment, no offer, nothing. Just action. Later, she confesses one of her biggest challenges: her autistic nephew. She says, “I just can’t do it. I don’t know how to interact with him.” And I’m thinking—sweetheart, I see you. You’re living some of this yourself.

Meeting her got me thinking about self-awareness. Noticing your patterns isn’t the same as controlling them. Awareness is step one; control, change, agency—that’s a whole other ballgame. That distinction—between knowing something about ourselves and having the ability and desire to change—is central to growing in confidence. Recognizing patterns is one thing; turning that knowledge into action is where true confidence lives. Tools, assessments, even feedback from others provide data—but they don’t automatically teach us how to act with clarity or courage.

If you’ve ever struggled to turn self-awareness into real confidence—or wondered why knowing your patterns isn’t enough—this episode dives into what it really takes to bridge that gap. Listen now and start seeing how awareness can become action.