We're so close to being finished watching every damn frame of Resident Evil! We just have to do this last little relatively simple job and OH DAMMIT OUCH don't be an LJ, Bryan! As we dig into director Zach Cregger's just-released reboot, you're getting our very new and honest reactions, but you're also getting:

• Stories about doing an escape room with Zach Cregger!
• More great facts about Constantin films!
• Uncomfortable similarities to one of our real human children!
• The true scream of one of our hosts!
• MAXINE
• Another great pitch for a sequel from the creator of LEON
• Thoughtful Franchise Talk, the final round of superlatives, and our surprising Definitive Ranking of the Resident Evil films!

Plus: tune into the end of the episode to learn which franchise we're watching Every Damn Frame of next (after a brief hiatus.)

This week: we ride motorcycle, we shoot gun, we make bad joke, we fire rocket launcher - all in our own personal way. After saying we weren't gonna do it, our hosts have in fact seen ALL FOUR computer-generated "canon" Resident Evil movies and for once, listening to this episode will take less time than watching the films yourself! Amazing! You know who else is amazing? Leon S. Kennedy. Listen as our hosts admit they finally "get it" and jump fully onboard the Leon train. Plus: how many of what we've determined to be Resident Evil's signature themes will we see in the films? Will there be computer maps? Zombie dogs? A convoy? Will anyone live life to the fullest? Will any out of left field moment surpass the greatest so far? Hint: MAYBE. YEAH. Wait until you "meet Sarah."

Other surprising revelations:

• The "Imzadi" of the Resident Evil paperback universe
• Everyone needs to keep better tabs on their brothers
• Being friends with the President
• Throwing china at a different President
• Surprising beauty effects of the boob scarab

It's the penultimamte episode of Series One - the new film is almost here, and we have now seen every damn frame that exists until September 18.

Itchy Tasty. Why did Leon take this job? Why did WE take this job? Is there something in the water, or is watching every damn frame of Johannes Roberts' Welcome to Raccoon City slowly driving us insane? We stopped off at Blockbuster on the way to Planet Hollywood to buy a used DVD of this first attempt at a live action reboot to see what a Resident Evil movie is like without every gamer's least favorite character Alice, and it's a wild ride.

Topics for Yelling About in Police Stations

• Being a "Wife Guy" means always playing the villain
• Studio Requests to Include Time Travel
• Brother Hunts
• The moment Jesse is finally onboard with the reboot
• Return of the Mack (TRAIN,) Return of TRAIN
• The fine art of the deranged needle drop
• Resident Evil is now a period piece

We also discuss our thoughts and fears about the upcoming 2026 reboot and what any of this means for the future of a franchise that quite literally dies but doesn't stay dead.

SHOW NOTES

Liz really wants you to see this Legends of Tomorrow "Return of the Mack" clip.

Hop in the ThunderTank and get ready for OUR Retaliation Mode, because it's time to discuss 2016's Resident Evil: The Final Chapter written and directed by Paul W.S. Anderson and starring Milla Jovovich and their daughter as the Red Queen. We discuss the fine art of gaslighting your way through a "previously on" and various little girls with scientist dads and get very excited about the prospect of an all new CONVOY. Meanwhile, we FINALLY get an overview of the Umbrella Corporation's business plan. It's the Final Chapter, but will our beloved filmmaker stick the landing with a $40m budget?

Other Good Bits:

• Jesse finally gets his motorcycle
• Someone's Betrayal Kink Saves the Day
• The inherent feminism in letting your gal pal deliver the coup de grace
• Inexplicable drawers full of heads
• Some good merch brainstorming
• A surprising graveyard TWIST

Plus, we do a final accounting for Superlatives across the entire Alice Saga but wait wait wait there's still more Resident Evil to come!

Show Notes:

BUY LIZ'S BOOK! How to Build a Robot (Boyfriend) is available now

This is Jesse's favorite of the acoustic guitar covers of the Resident Evil theme

We're back! Our podcast software tried to kill us but luckily we injected it with a special parasite that lets it drive motorcycles and still upload podcasts! This week our hosts discuss 2012's Resident Evil Retribution written and directed by Paul W.S. Anderson and starring lots of old friends who might have to die to pay the gamer tax on the new friends. Franchise talk gets super interesting as we hurtle towards The Final Chapter and we encounter our first "intended to be shot back-to-back with the next installment" - a mainstay of the franchise ecosystem. Plus: Proof that Alice can wear normal clothes! And a totally useless post-credits sequence.

Other Topics This Week:

• Channeling Derek Zoolander
• Love-Inhibiting Sleeves
• A Shortage of Action Boys with Swoopy Hair
• 3D maps of Brutal Murders
• Adapting a Video Game by Adapting the Experience of Playing a Video Game
• New Business Models and Industrial Espionage for the Umbrella Corporation

Meanwhile, the graveyard sweater has been holding a Superlative since Episode One, will anything topple it as Alice's Worst Outfit? And are our hosts even sure it's a sweater?

Show Notes:

Kind of nutso that we utterly failed to make the connection that Li Bingbing is the lead actress in The Meg. With her actual human voice.

Also MASSIVE SHOUTOUT this week to Acon Digital Restoration Suite which played a huge role in rescuing the audio sabotaged by Riversi- I mean, the Red Queen.

SURPRISE SUNGLASSES ATTACK! It’s The Resident Evil Afterlife episode. We are so back! And so is Paul W.S. Anderson in the director’s chair. Milla Jovovich is also back. And back. And back as we go so far beyond doublin’ up the hotties. But who else is back (apart from Liz, Asa, and Jesse?) Join us as we discuss 2010’s fourth installment in the Resident Evil franchise and discover how you create the fourth installment of a trilogy that’s definitely going to have a Part Five.

Topics of Note:

• Liz’s true feelings about heels
• Phones (and axes) for you
• Working in the Boob Scarab Division
• Faculty Coffee Bars suitable for the Umbrella Corporation
• The meaning of “no sleeves”
• Hollywood Producer Solutions to Zombie Escape Plans
• Resident Evil Vs. Marvel dream fights
• Star Power, Bitches

PLUS: Who in Superlatives is Living Their Best (After)Life?

SHOW NOTES

Jesse once again can’t seem to get the name of the Jefferson Airplane song correct. But he CAN pronounce Jovovich!

Wesker in Marvel Vs. Capcom

The Wesker vs. Chris Redfield fight complete with Sunglasses Attack

Please subscribe to Liz's Stream On newsletter! She’s doing god’s work!

We're joining the convoy this week. Whose convoy? You know whose convoy! Accept no substitutes! Join us as we discuss every damn frame of Russel Mulchay's 2007 film Resident Evil Extinction, written by Milla Jovovich's now-husband Paul W.S. Anderson. We use the power of our minds not to manipulate firestorms but instead go deep on the concept of a trilogy versus a series, as well as the business of filmmaking in the early 00's and the business plans of the Umbrella Corporation.

Notable topics:

• Great around-the-horn ensemble introductions
• Jesse's love for K-Mart
• Chekov's crow
• Why women deserve convoys
• Resident Evil as a feminist masterpiece
• Pillow talk in the Anderson/Jovovich household

PLUS: The Debut of Fashion Corner with Liz and the Boys

SHOW NOTES

Some notes on Wolf Cuts

Jesse is quite chagrined at the number of times he maligns Jefferson Airplane in both this and the next episode. The song is of course called "White Rabbit" and not "Go Ask Alice" and the Resident Evil Extinction cover is by Collide

Oh! And you should subscribe to Liz's Stream On newsletter!

We're are now definitely residents of the evil (even if we don’t know what that means.) Join as as we discuss every damn frame of 2004’s Resident Evil Apocalypse, directed by Alexander Witt and written by Milla Jovovich’s now-boyfriend Paul W. S. Anderson. Your Raccoon Squad of Liz, Jesse, and Asa can finally dig into the art and business of franchises because there are now two installments, but the biggest cliffhanger of the episode can only be answered if Snoop Dogg or a close associate cares to get in touch and reveal it!

Topic of Great Import This Episode

• The Gamer Tax
• How to Recognize a Movie Scientist
• Bisexual Awakenings
• Go-To Women’s Fashion Brands
• When to Start Feeding People to Your Zombie Relative
• More Lessons in how to pronounce “Jovovich”

SHOW NOTES

Carlos Oliviera looks like this in the Capcom game.

Somehow 2 out of 3 of us got the hang of pronouncing “Jovovich” but Ms. Jovovich, we are truly sorry, we ALL seem to have fallen into the very stupid trap of now somehow mispronouncing “Milla.”

We’re @everydamnframe on instagram and Bluesky! Share your Resident Evil Apocalypse thoughts with us!

SUPERLATIVES ( as of Resident Evil) - What will stay? What will take something’s slot?

Alice’s Best Outfit - Red Dress

Alice’s Worst Outfit - Graveyard Sweater

Best Sidekick - Kaplan

Best Action Sequence - Laser Murder Hallway

Most Ridiculous Moment - Jump Kicking A Zombie Dog

Best Thing from the Game - Raccoon City

Best Thing the Movies Made Up (that’s not Alice) - The Red Queen
Our Favorite Monster - Licker

Best Music - Slipknot

Most Out of Left Field Thing So Far: James Purfoy’s “The Conversation”
Thread We Most Want to See Resolved: Where Did Alice Come From

Best Cliffhanger: Paper Dress Shotgun

Who Was Living Life to the Fullest - Rain Ocampo