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If sex feels like a chore in your 40s or 50s, you're not broken.

In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, we're unpacking why desire disappears during perimenopause — even when love hasn't — and how to reconnect with intimacy without pushing through pain or guilt.

You'll learn:

• How hormone shifts impact desire, arousal, and lubrication
• Why stress and mental load can shut pleasure down
• The "stress-sex loop" that makes everything harder (literally and emotionally)
• How orgasm can support your health — when it's actually wanted
• The one shift that helped me move out of a six-month dry spell

Whether you're feeling disconnected from your sex drive, worried sex will hurt, or supporting a partner through these changes — this episode is for you.

Grab the Colour Me Curious: The Playful Pleasure Map HERE!

Check out the Masterclass HERE

If this episode resonates, tap follow and leave a review — and share it with someone who needs to hear: You are not broken. Your body is changing. And you still deserve pleasure.

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Why does sex feel different after having kids — or in perimenopause and midlife? Flatter, harder, painful, or just... off?

You're not broken. And your body isn't failing you.

In this episode, we talk about what actually happens to your body, brain, and nervous system after childbirth, postpartum, and hormonal shifts — and how to start rebuilding intimacy, even if things feel disconnected.

You'll learn:

• Why most of us never learned how our pleasure actually works
• What changes physically and hormonally after birth and during perimenopause
• Why "low libido" is often about pressure — not desire
• How performance anxiety and rushed sex shut pleasure down
• A simple, no-pressure experiment to start rebuilding intimacy
• The difference between knowing anatomy vs. having a real relationship with your body

This is for people with vulvas, penises, and couples of all genders who feel out of sync with their body — or with each other — after having kids.

Sex doesn't stop working because you're doing something wrong. It stops working when the old rules no longer fit your life (or nervous system).

Join the live workshop: Colour Me Curious
Explore your body, talk about it with your partner, and rebuild pleasure step by step.

Come solo or with a partner. Replay included.

Grab it here!

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What if the biggest mood killer in your sex life isn't lack of desire, time, or chemistry—but the pressure to be perfect?

In this episode, we're digging into why chasing "perfect sex" actually leads to more awkwardness, less connection, and way less fun. Plus, how to shift from performance mode into curiosity and communication.

We cover:

• Why performance anxiety shows up even in long-term relationships
• How to talk during sex without killing the vibe
• Why perfectionism quietly shuts down pleasure
• What it really means to treat sex like a team sport
• Easy, in-the-moment ways to speak up and stay connected

If sex has started to feel tense, rushed, or like you're just guessing, this episode will help you breathe again.

Plus, I share what my partner and I are experimenting with right now, and why giving feedback in bed is a green flag, not a red one.

Valentine's Day Workshop – Color Me Curious
Join me live on February 14 for a playful, pressure-free workshop where you'll learn:

• How to shift from parent mode to lover mode
• The anatomy lesson you missed in school
• A simple way to practice sexual feedback
• How to stop relying on mind reading and start creating crave-worthy sex

$27 | Live + Replay Included. GRAB IT HERE

Sex doesn't get better by trying harder.
It gets better when you get curious.

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Welcome to Season 2! We're kicking things off with a hard truth: If sex feels awkward, disconnected, or just plain off, you might be sabotaging your own sex life without realizing it.

In this episode, I'm sharing three traps that quietly kill intimacy — even in the most loving relationships — and what you can do to turn things around.

We'll talk about:

• Why "special occasion sex" backfires
• The performance mindset that ruins the moment
• The myth of instant arousal
• Why mind reading is not a turn-on (spoiler: communication is)
  
  

Plus, I've got details for my LIVE Valentine's Day Workshop coming up on February 14. It's just $27, with two time slots to choose from. No pressure. No awkward moments. Just a playful, private way to reconnect — solo or with your partner.

Save your spot here: https://intimacyafterkids.com/colour-me-curious

Subscribe to the show for weekly conversations about intimacy, confidence, and real-life sex without the shame.

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Is your relationship feeling more like roommates than romantic partners? You're not alone—and you're not stuck.

In this episode, I'm walking you through the proven framework that's helping couples reconnect and rebuild intimacy in a real, practical way. We'll talk about:

• The four phases of intimacy every couple experiences
• Why sex after kids matters more than you think — for your whole family
• How to break out of frustration and get back to each other

This is the episode for you if you're craving honest conversations, clear steps, and a renewed connection with your partner in 2026.

💌 Want early access to my Valentine’s Day offer?
Join the list here → https://intimacyafterkids.com/

Got thoughts or questions about this episode? I’d love to hear from you. Shoot me a message or tag me on Instagram @Intimacyafterkids

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Have you ever had sex end in shutdown, rushing, or unexpected emotion, and neither of you knew what just happened?

In this intimate episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, I explore why sex can feel heavy, confusing, or emotionally charged for couples, even when there is love and desire on both sides.

This episode is for you if:

• One partner shuts down, goes numb, or gets emotional during sex
• The other feels rejected or unsure how to help
• Sex gets rushed just to get through it
• A body feels unfamiliar after babies, trauma, surgery, or perimenopause

I share my personal story of spending years fighting her body and how learning one key somatic skill, along with her partner learning how to support instead of fix, created the biggest shift in their sex life.

You'll learn why these patterns are nervous system responses, not failures, and how couples can start moving back toward safe, light, and enjoyable intimacy together.

✨ If this resonates, book a free Spark Session to get unstuck and find your way back to easy, fun sex again.

BOOK HERE

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Why do you feel unchosen, unsexy, and alone, even when your relationship looks "fine"?

If you're the one always initiating hard conversations, tracking emotional distance, or trying to "fix" disconnection... you may be managing the emotional labor of the relationship by yourself.

And over time, that role quietly erodes safety, intimacy, and desire, not because love disappears, but because the mutuality does.

In this final episode of our 4-part Mental Load series, we explore:

• What "managing the relationship" actually looks like (hint: it's not just planning date night)
• Why emotional labor is real labor, especially when it comes to sex and repair
• How the manager–assistant dynamic kills erotic energy on both sides
• The anxious–avoidant loop that drives overfunctioning and shutdown
• A reframe that changes everything (without blaming your partner)
• One weekly check-in that can start restoring connection right now

This isn't about calling your partner out.

It's about calling out a system that's hurting both of you, and learning how to change the dance.

✨ Want to rebuild connection and desire, together?

Book a free Spark Session to explore if Naked Fun Comeback is the right next step for your relationship.

Click to BOOK HERE!

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How do you actually share the mental load without constant fighting, resentment, or feeling like you’re doing it all?

This is part 3 of a 4-part series on the mental load — and today, we're getting practical.

I'm sharing how my partner and I used the Fair Play Method by Eve Rodsky to manage the mental load in our house — what worked, what didn't, and how we adapted it for real life with kids, neurodivergence, and wildly different nervous systems.

We talk about:

• Why Fair Play is not about 50/50 — and what to aim for instead
• What it actually means to "own" a task
• The mistake most couples make when they inventory chores
• How staying in your own lane can feel lighter than "helping"
• And how we started with just 5–10 daily grind cards

Plus, my honest take on the Fair Play book itself — when it's helpful, and when it might make things harder (especially if your partner is already feeling defensive).

This episode is about making the invisible visible — without turning your relationship into a negotiation table.

In the final episode of this series, we'll talk about the mental load of sex... and who carries responsibility for tending the relationship itself.