On today's episode I chat with Keith and Courtney, cohosts of the podcast Tripping Over Love. Keith is licensed therapist and a Level 3 IFS Consultant, and Courtney is journalist and podcaster. They joined me to share their beautiful, messy love story.

We dive into the courage it takes to start over, the "trauma" of the dating apps, and how they've used Internal Family Systems (IFS) and psychedelics to navigate the "breakups, breakdowns, and breakthroughs" of their relationship .

We discuss:

• Starting relationships with truth instead of performance.

• Radical transparency — "starting with the ending" — as a foundation for trust.

• Why telling the truth early can save a relationship later.

• Loving someone while still grieving a past life.

• Speaking for parts instead of from them in moments of conflict.

• Finding the courage to try again after loss and heartbreak.

• Dating is messy: Getting honest about the "thrift store shopping" energy of dating apps.

• The difference between loving someone and being "in love."

• IFS as "four-wheel drive": Turning toward the model when relationships get stuck.

• How psychedelic-assisted journeys helped unlock grief — and create space to love again.

Extended Interview

At the end of our chat, I asked them each for one piece of advice for couples. This extended interviews is available for paid subscribers over on The One Inside Substack.

• Podcast: Tripping Over Love

• Substack

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

On today's episode I welcome my friend David Stern to the podcast. This conversation feels so perfect right now. It's full of the kind of hope we all need. David has this beautiful way of seeing the spiritual dimension in everything we do.

David calls us to remember our "Pure Soul"—the part of us that is already peaceful and cannot be destroyed. He talks about parts as "angels in disguise," the ones inside that have taken on difficult roles to protect that inner light. If you're looking for a way to stay connected to yourself in a chaotic world, this episode is a sacred reminder that your essence is always already okay.

• Why David looks for the unbridled aliveness in every person he meets.
• Reimagining our parts as refractions of a primal, divine intelligence.
• How to hold the "horrors" of the world while still choosing to love our people and stay present.
• Practicing "remembrance" to help shift out of the noise and back into your heart.

David Stern, Psy.D. is a licensed psycholgoist, certified IFS consultant, dedicated teacher, and the creator of the Thinking Heart IFS Intensive. He also co-founded IFS Healers, an online Community of Practice designed to foster connection, deepen learning, and build community among IFS practitioners. David has trained hundreds of students worldwide and has presented at the IFS International Conference and consults with practitioners globally.

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

In this episode, I'm joined by my friend Daphne Fatter for a timely and honest conversation about what so many of us are navigating right now, as therapists, as parents, and as humans living in a polarized and chaotic time. We talk about nervous system overwhelm, numb and checked-out parts, news consumption, activism, community connection, and how to stay grounded when things feel "too much." We also touch on Daphne's new book: Integrating Internal Family Systems Interventions into EMDR Therapy.

In this episode:

• Why so many of us feel numb, frozen, or checked out right now

• Normalizing survival responses and protectors during times of stress

• How polarization shows up both culturally and inside our own systems

• Staying curious about people with different political perspectives

• Finding ways to stay informed without burning out on the news

• Why connection, shared humanity, and community matter so much right now

I get blended a few times in this episode and say, "I can't believe I said that." This is such a great example of how quickly any of us can blend with passionate and opinionated parts when navigating stressful topics.

Be sure to check out my extended interview with Daphne over on Substack.

Daphne Fatter, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist, integrative trauma consultant, author, and international speaker specializing in integrative trauma-informed therapies. She is the author of Integrating Internal Family Systems Interventions into EMDR Therapy and is widely recognized for her expertise in blending parts work with evidence-based trauma modalities.

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

Today's episode is a little different, in a really wonderful way.

I sit down with Dick Schwartz and Jeanne Catanzaro, President and Vice President of the IFS Institute, and partners in both leadership and life. This isn't a traditional interview; it's more like listening in on friends and colleagues talking about the things they care about, the serious, the personal, and the very human.

I've been feeling curious about what's happening inside IFS leadership right now. The model keeps growing, reaching more people, and carrying more responsibility with it. I wanted to hear directly from Dick and Jeanne about what that growth and momentum have been like for them, not just in terms of roles and plans, but personally and as partners.

In this candid conversation, we explore questions many of you have been holding. What happens as the Institute grows? Is Dick going to retire? What does transition even look like? We talk about all of that, but in a funny, sometimes ridiculous, and very real way.

What I hope you hear is the care, thoughtfulness, and humanity behind the scenes of both the IFS Institute and the IFS model.

We talk about:

• Jeanne stepping into leadership and visibility over time

• What it means to steward a model that's bigger than any one person

• Succession, responsibility, and caring for the future of IFS

• Collaboration and "sharing the stage"

• Knowing when to take a break from "parts talk"

• Bringing IFS beyond the therapy room and into the wider world

• Holding research, spirituality, and accessibility at the same time

• Finding balance between work, partnership, family, and rest

• Favorite shows, hobbies, and Firefighter behaviors

There's a lot of warmth here, some laughter, a little potty talk, and plenty of insight.

Links:

IFS Institute

Jeanne Catanzaro

Dick Schwartz

Word of the Year on Substack

Episode Sponsor

This episode is sponsored by the Unblend.me web app. You know those moments between sessions when something comes up and you need a gentle nudge to pause, slow down and go inside? The Unblend app helps you do just that. It's IFS informed, HIPAA compliant, and guides you through checking in with your parts to calm your nervous system. Learn more and try it for free at Unblend.me

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

We all feel numb sometimes. Our numbing parts protect us from stress, pain, and overwhelm. But what happens when numbness lingers?

As we kick off The One Inside's seventh season, Jeff and I share what we've learned about working with numbing parts. We led a workshop at the recent 2025 IFS Annual Conference called Why Check In When You Can Check Out: A Self-Led Approach to Numbing Parts.

In this episode we walk you through the highlights of our workshop and share a few of the insights we brought home from the conference.

We discuss:

• What I discovered about numbness, embodiment, and grief this past year

• Numb parts are "invisible protectors" and why simply naming the numb matters

• The compounding opportunity costs of numbing and what we miss when we spend too much time checked out

• The grief of emerging from numbness

• How numbness shows up across generations and cultures

• The NUMB framework we created for reconnecting with Self

I keep returning to this slide from our deck: Our protectors think they're saving our lives, but sometimes they're quietly stealing our vitality.

I share a lot about my numb season, and how naming the "nothing" became a game-changer. I hope as you listen you'll notice your own ways of checking in and checking out and name the places where numbness shows up for you.

This week's episode is sponsored by:

Pisgah Coaching Institute: Founded by IFS-trained master coach Brian Jaudon, a pioneer in the integration of IFS and coaching for more than two decades. Brian and his faculty teach a blended methodology for clarifying and living into a vision of any kind. pisgahcoaching.com

Pause With Laura: Restore Your Self Retreat for IFS Therapists & Practitioners at Kripalu, October 19-22, 2025. Download FREE IFS Resources from Laura (PDF & guided meditations). Join our Pause with Laura community for monthly Parts Reflections and deals on upcoming offerings.

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, live events, meditations, and extended interviews.

• Find merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch select clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS coach who helps practitioners create with confidence and clarity.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.

In this episode I chat with Joe Bielling, a Level 3 IFS practitioner, licensed therapist, and co-author of From Broken to Badass. We talk about what happens when coping, adapting, and belonging slowly pull us away from ourselves, and how to find your way back.

Joe shares parts of his personal story, including a period he describes as a mental breakdown and spiritual awakening, and how IFS helped him slow down, notice his parts, and reconnect with his body, heart, and Self Energy.

We discuss:

• Self-forgetting, people-pleasing, and the "chameleon" strategies of belonging

• How Enneagram dynamics show up in relationships and identity

• Unblending as both a psychological process and a spiritual experience

• Why "the resistance is actually part of the path"

• How IFS and non-duality can point to more than either-or thinking

• Why staying "broken" can feel safer to some parts of us

• Gratitude for coping strategies before trying to change them

• The question underneath it all: Who is the one behind my eyes?

Extended Substack Conversation

In the extended interview over on Substack, Joe and I talk about hope, embodiment, trauma, and the Enneagram centers. Joe shares what helps him stay embodied now and where he's finding hope.

About Joe Bielling

Joe Bielling is a licensed therapist and Level 3 IFS practitioner. He is the co-author with Kate West of From Broken to Badass, a practical IFS based book that helps people break free from high level coping strategies, and old outdated survival patterns, into empowered living. Their work brings together Internal Family Systems, nervous system science, and to help people find real freedom through embodied presence. Joe is also the founder of Unify Yourself — a national collaboration platform exploring the intersection of spirituality, psychology, and community.

This episode is sponsored by the Unblend.me web app. You know those moments between sessions when something comes up and you need a gentle nudge to pause, slow down and go inside? The Unblend app helps you do just that. It's IFS informed, HIPAA compliant, and guides you through checking in with your parts to calm your nervous system. Learn more and try it for free at Unblend.me

I started this podcast to help spread IFS out into the world and make the model more accessible to everyone. Seven years later, that's still at the heart of all we do.

• Join The One Inside Substack community for bonus conversations, extended interviews, meditations, and more.

• Find Self-Led merch at The One Inside store.

• Listen to episodes and watch clips on YouTube.

• Follow me on Instagram @ifstammy or on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

I co-create The One Inside with Jeff Schrum, a Level 2 IFS practitioner and coach.

• New to IFS? My book, The One Inside: Thirty Days to Your Authentic Self, is a great place to start.

• Want a free meditation? Sign up for my email list and get "Get to Know a Should Part" right away.

Want to sponsor an episode of The One Inside? Email Tammy.