This week, we’re diving deep into the messy reality of being a functioning adult (or at least pretending to be one). We kick things off with a highly professional scouting report on Timothée Chalamet. Is he a "pure, wholesome boy," or is he just another victim of the Kardashian-Jenner "clan" aesthetic? Honestly, we’re just worried he’s straying too far from his "type," though we can't deny the man looks fine as hell in a top hat.

Then, things get real. And by real, we mean Chef Marie working "like a migrant" (his words, not ours... mostly) and dealing with the joy of Shingles. Turns out, it’s not just a fake illness wives use for attention—who knew? We also explore the high-stakes world of DIY fertility testing. If you’ve ever wanted to "check the gravy" via a pharmacy kit before biology decides to shut down the factory, this one's for you. Plus, we talk vasectomies, the struggle of strollers in Madrid, and why your kid having a golf-ball-sized bruise on his head might actually trigger a wellness check from the principal. Stay grateful, stay strapped (with a condom or a stroller, your choice), and remember: the math ain't mathing if your kid is born two years after you moved countries.

Grab a cold one (even if it’s a Monday, we won't judge—much) and join Kiko Flow and Chef Maurice for another chaotic dive into the absolute nonsense that is human existence. We take a deep dive into the high-stakes world of sportsmanship-style butt-slapping. Is it a bonding ritual? Or just an excuse to "dance with the devil"?

We get into the gritty details of our own childhood crimes—shoutout to those of you who burned your report cards to avoid a beatdown—and the terrifying evolution of punishment, from the classic belt to the high-precision "stiletto heel to the dome." Plus, we talk about the struggle of being the "strict".

Look, we’re not saying our parents were monsters, but let’s just say some of us grew up in a "Highlight Reel" of flying footwear. In this episode, we’re diving deep into the trauma—oops, we mean tradition—of Latino upbringing versus the new-age "gentle parenting" craze. Is it actually possible to raise a kid without losing your mind?

Ever felt like you’re "not from here nor from there"? Yeah, us too. We're essentially professional nomads because we’re too broke to stay in one place long enough to get a mortgage. We’re dissecting why our accents are basically "seasoning" for the soul (and why girls love it, sorry ladies, we’re off the market), before pivoting to the important stuff: Astrology vs. Astronomy. Kiko admits he was a huge horoscope nerd until he stopped doing acid. Coincidence? Probably not.

Also, Chef Maurice went to the "Symphonic Stadium" (the symphony, for you non-refined folks) and felt like a high-class citizen for approximately two hours, while Kiko’s weekend involved supporting a friend with a screw in his toe and discussing a medical procedure that left his ear looking like... well, a "loose roast beef."

Forget FOMO—we’re officially entering the era of FOBI: Fear Of Being Invited. If you’re a millennial approaching 40, you know the vibe. Whether it’s a baby shower or a random "let's grab drinks" text, we’re squiggling out of plans faster than a shark in a cage. We also dive into the etiquette of taking selfies at concentration camps (spoiler: don't be a piece of shit), the "English mind" not understanding American accents in London, and why Brendan Fraser is the only man allowed to make us cry on a Sunday night.