Épisodes

  • The Power of Habit: Small Changes, Big Impact

    The Power of Habit: Small Changes, Big Impact
    Apr 29 2025
    Sometimes the smallest routines carry the biggest weight. In this episode, you’ll hear a personal story from Fri's second tour in Iraq—how one consistent habit kept him grounded when everything else felt like chaos, and how fast things fell apart when he got home. If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or like you’re slipping into bad patterns, you’re not alone. We’ll break down the real difference between bad habits and signs of depression, how they feed into each other, and what it means to rebuild when you’re too drained to even start. You’ll learn: How depression and bad habits form a loop that keeps you stuck Why small actions—like cleaning one corner or walking for two minutes—matter What keystone habits are and how they can shape your identity How structure and environment play a bigger role than motivation If the big picture feels too big, this episode is your reminder: you don’t have to fix everything today. Just start with something small. Start where you are. 📚 References Used in This Episode: Clear, J. (2018). Atomic Habits. Avery Publishing. Duhigg, C. (2012). The Power of Habit. Random House. Yin, H. H., & Knowlton, B. J. (2006). The role of the basal ganglia in habit formation. Neuron, 7(6), 464–476. National Institute of Mental Health. (2023). Major Depression Statistics. www.nimh.nih.gov American Psychological Association. (2020). Stress in America 2020. www.apa.org
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    21 min
  • Endurance vs Resilience: The Key to Thriving, Not Just Surviving

    Endurance vs Resilience: The Key to Thriving, Not Just Surviving
    Apr 22 2025
    Are you just surviving, or are you truly thriving? In this episode of Life’s a Bitch, Get a Helmet, we dive into a critical mindset shift—understanding the difference between endurance and resilience.We’ve all heard phrases like “Embrace the Suck” and “Just push through.” Endurance helps you survive tough times, but if you rely on it for too long, it can leave you drained, burnt out, and stuck. Resilience, on the other hand, is what allows you to recover, adapt, and come out stronger on the other side.I share personal experiences—including a toxic work environment that nearly broke me and a leadership example that changed how I approach challenges. Plus, we’ll break down five actionable strategies to help you build resilience, shift your mindset, and move beyond endurance mode.If you’ve ever felt like life is one long grind with no end in sight, this episode is for you. Because let’s be real—you can only “Embrace the Suck” for so long before it starts sucking the life out of you.Tune in now to learn how to stop just surviving and start thriving. Listener Connection: Have a story about resilience or a time when you realized endurance wasn’t enough? Email me at lifesabtchhgetahelmet@gmail.com or send a message through www.lifesabtchhgetahelmet.com. Your story might help someone else! Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it. #Resilience #Endurance #MindsetShift #MentalStrength #ThrivingNotSurviving #LifesABitchGetAHelmet
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    26 min
  • The Courage to Ask for Help – Breaking the Stigma Around Vulnerability

    The Courage to Ask for Help – Breaking the Stigma Around Vulnerability
    Apr 16 2025
    Admitting that we need help—whether in our personal lives, careers, or mental health—can feel like an impossible step. But in reality, it’s one of the most courageous things we can do. In this episode of Life’s a Bitch, Get a Helmet, Fri dives into the stigma surrounding asking for help, especially in high-performance environments like the military, where self-reliance is often valued above all else. Fri shares personal experiences of struggling with the fear of asking for help, how early life experiences reinforced a sense of needing to figure everything out alone, and how a mentor, Scott Young, helped shift that perspective. Research from the Military Health System highlights how the deeply ingrained stigma around mental health in the military often prevents service members from speaking up about their struggles, fearing professional consequences. But avoiding help only makes things worse, increasing isolation and stress. This episode also explores the role of leadership in normalizing vulnerability. Drawing from Simon Sinek’s Leaders Eat Last, Fri discusses how empathy is the cornerstone of effective leadership, and how leaders like Scott Young foster environments where asking for help is not just accepted but encouraged. Additionally, Make the Connection (2024) emphasizes that veterans transitioning to civilian life often struggle without a support system, making it crucial to build networks where seeking help is seen as a sign of strength. By the end of this episode, you’ll walk away with a practical exercise to challenge your own hesitations around asking for help: Identify three situations where you hesitated to seek support. Reflect on what stopped you—fear, pride, uncertainty? Imagine a close friend facing the same issue. How would you respond to them? Take one small step toward asking for help within the next 24 hours. If you know someone struggling, reach out and check in on them. Share your experience or thoughts by emailing lifesabtchhgetahelmet@gmail.com or leaving a comment at www.lifesabtchhgetahelmet.com. Tune in now to learn how breaking the stigma around vulnerability can lead to personal growth, stronger leadership, and deeper connections.
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    21 min
  • Better Decisions Start Within Mindset, Self-Talk, and Sounding Boards

    Better Decisions Start Within Mindset, Self-Talk, and Sounding Boards
    Apr 8 2025
    Making decisions can feel like an uphill battle, especially when your inner voice is your toughest critic. In this episode of Life’s a Bitch, Get a Helmet, we dive into the three essential tools for improving decision-making: reframing negative self-talk, using self-talk as a processing tool, and leveraging sounding boards for external insight. Fri shares personal experiences of struggling with self-doubt and negative self-talk, explaining how shifting his mindset helped him break free from destructive thought patterns. Drawing insights from Marc Cordon’s TED Talk The Power of Self-Talk (2019), this episode highlights the profound impact of the words we tell ourselves. According to Military.com (2016), the way we speak to ourselves shapes our confidence, decisions, and overall success. Fri discusses how self-talk is more than just thinking out loud—it’s a method for organizing thoughts and uncovering hidden emotions. Research from the Pew Research Center (2018) suggests that most Americans rely on their own research for decision-making, reinforcing the importance of structured self-reflection. But self-reflection alone isn’t always enough. That’s where sounding boards come in. Fri explores how having a trusted friend, mentor, or peer to reflect your thoughts back to you can provide game-changing clarity. Make the Connection (2024) emphasizes the power of group support and external perspectives, especially for veterans navigating major life transitions. By the end of the episode, you’ll walk away with a practical challenge to implement these tools: Record yourself talking through a decision. Listen back and take notes on your thought patterns. Reframe any negative self-talk into something constructive. Seek a sounding board for additional insight. Make a decision and evaluate how the process helped you. Try it out and share your experience at lifesabtchhgetahelmet@gmail.com or leave a comment on www.lifesabtchhgetahelmet.com. 🎧 Tune in now and learn how to take control of your inner voice, break through decision-making paralysis, and move forward with confidence. Help from Mureka.ai for Intro/Outro music. Help from ChatGPT for organizing and flow of this episode.
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    20 min
  • Acknowledging the Aftermath: Leadership, Mistakes, and Growth

    Acknowledging the Aftermath: Leadership, Mistakes, and Growth
    Apr 1 2025
    What happens when leadership goes wrong? What do you do when past failures haunt you, and the weight of responsibility feels unbearable?In this episode, I take you back to a moment that stuck with me—a leadership failure that nearly derailed a mission during my second tour in Iraq. I made a mistake that could have cost lives, and for years, I carried that failure like dead weight. But more importantly, I break down what I learned from it, how I rebuilt myself as a leader, and the hard truths that transformed my approach to leadership and growth.If you’ve ever questioned your abilities as a leader, struggled with past mistakes, or wondered how to grow from failure—this episode is for you.What You’ll Hear in This Episode:✅ The Mission Failure That Changed Everything – A mistake that haunted me and what it revealed about leadership gaps.✅ The Cost of Silence in Leadership – Why my team didn’t speak up and how that reflected on me as their leader.✅ The Harsh Reality of Poor Mentorship – What happens when leadership development is left to trial and error instead of guidance.✅ The Growth Process – How I ran my own personal AAR (After Action Review), sought brutal honesty, and started making real changes.✅ The Moment I Knew I Had Changed – Years later, a single moment at Annual Training confirmed the growth I had worked so hard for.✅ How YOU Can Apply These Lessons – Three actionable steps to start owning your mistakes, growing as a leader, and rebuilding trust.This episode isn’t just about mistakes—it’s about what comes after. Growth doesn’t happen overnight, and leadership isn’t about getting it right every time. It’s about learning, adjusting, and stepping up—even when it’s uncomfortable.So, what’s the moment you’re waiting for? What’s stopping you from becoming the leader you want to be?Listener Connection: Have you had a moment where leadership mistakes changed you? Email me at lifesabtchhgetahelmet@gmail.com or send a message through www.lifesabtchhgetahelmet.com. I’d love to hear your story.Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.#Leadership #Growth #Accountability #LessonsLearned #LifesABitchGetAHelmet
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    46 min
  • Embrace The Suck! (Solo w/Fri)

    Embrace The Suck! (Solo w/Fri)
    Mar 15 2024

    Embrace the Suck, Weather the Storm. It doesn't matter what you call it. It's not a lifestyle or goal to live in the Suck of Life. Lets take some time to figure out how to get out of the Suck and back into the life you were meant to be in. Happy.
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    18 min
  • What am I thinking?! (Solo W/Fri)

    What am I thinking?! (Solo W/Fri)
    Mar 8 2024
    Do you find yourself overthinking? All the Time? Do you feel like you can never stop yourself from overthinking and over analyzing a situation or feeling? If you can relate like I have to this topic, you will be able to identify which "Thinking Trap" you're caught in. Maybe you'll be able to tell how many different "Thinking Traps" you've found yourself in over the years, much like me. Let's figure out which one, how many, why and how to get out of it.
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    32 min
  • Hey Inner Voice, STFU!!! (Solo W/Fri)

    Hey Inner Voice, STFU!!! (Solo W/Fri)
    Mar 8 2024

    I'm told talking to yourself is a sign of you going crazy, or something like that. I've come to find out this is not true for most cases. I know I have battled with my Inner Voice more times than I count. Most of the time, it's because my thoughts are in a negative setting. Don't let your Inner Voice control you. Tell it to SHUT UP! It's Okay if you do. They aren't in charge, You Are! So put the Bitch in Check!
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    34 min