AI is being turned to as a replacement for therapy. As a sex therapist who specialises in low libido, I wanted to know - can it actually help with something as nuanced as low sex drive in a marriage?

So I put it to the test. I pretended to be a typical client of mine - a woman in a long-term relationship, struggling with low desire and shame around her turn-ons - and turned to both a trained mental health bot and ChatGPT to see what they got right, what they got wrong, and what most people would never notice was missing.

We look at what the research says about AI's accuracy in sexual & mental health, why feeling understood isn't necessarily the same as actually being understood, and where AI genuinely helps versus where it might make things like low libido and relationship issues worse.

In this episode, we explore:

• What the research reveals about how AI chatbots actually perform on sexual health and therapy scenarios
• The results of my own experiment pretending to be a client struggling with low sex drive and shame around what turns her on
• How AI tends to over-validate, skip the questions a sex therapist would ask, and offer solutions before it knows you
• How AI can sneakily reinforce the very patterns that create low desire and sexual problems in marriage in the first place
• When AI is a useful thought partner for relationship and sex issues, and when it falls short of what real therapy does

Today's studies:

Evaluation of Artificial Intelligence Chatbots for Providing Sexual Health Information: A Consensus Study Using Real-World Clinical Queries

Published in BMC Public Health in 2025.

A Comparison of Responses from Human Therapists and LLM-Based Chatbots

Published in JMIR Mental Health in 2025.

The Ability of AI Therapy Bots to Set Limits With Distressed Adolescents

Published in JMIR Mental Health in 2025.

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Join my 1:1 online program Re:Desire here.

Do you want to submit a listener question for the podcast? Here's the link

We've all heard it before: "Men always want sex". They’re simple and always raring to go.

As a sex therapist specialising in low libido and mismatched desire, I know the toll these kinds of myths can take on the individual and the relationship at large.

In this minisode, I break down one of the most common myths about male sexuality — and how it contributes to low desire, performance pressure, and shame.

Interested in my services? Check them out here

Join my 1:1 online program Re:Desire here.

Do you want to submit a listener question for the podcast? Here's the link

Low desire in women is often treated as a hormonal problem or a relationship one.

But what if the problem isn’t low libido persay, but rather a lost connection to your body?

In this episode, I talk to psychologist and leading sex researcher Dr. Lori Brotto about the science of mindfulness and why it’s become one of the most effective psychological treatments for low desire and arousal in women.

We discuss how mindfulness improves sexual wellbeing, why physical arousal and mental desire don’t always match, and why pills designed to “fix” low desire often fall short.

We explore:

• What mindfulness actually is — and why it’s often misunderstood
• Why improving body awareness (interoception) can influence desire
• The research behind mindfulness-based sex therapy
• Why physical arousal and mental desire don’t always align
• The limits of medications designed to treat low desire
• The role of shame and self-criticism in sexual difficulties
• Why relationship therapy alone often doesn’t resolve sexual problems
• Where to start if you’re curious about using mindfulness to reconnect with desire

02:31 - How Dr. Lori Brotto Got Into Sex Research

05:29 - What Is Mindfulness, Really?

14:34 - How Mindfulness Works for Low Desire

18:11 - Arousal Non-Concordance (& Why It Matters?)

21:49 - The Problem with Pharmaceutical Solutions

24:59 - Spontaneous vs. Responsive Desire

29:22 - Why Relationship Therapy Alone Often Isn't Enough

30:46 - The Mirror Exercise & Confronting Shame

33:18 - How Often Should You Practice Mindfulness?

37:06 - Mindfulness for Neurodivergent People

40:49 - What If You Hate Mindfulness?

42:28 - The Hope Effect & Reducing Distress

43:34 - Mindfulness Research On Men

46:26 - The Importance of Women's Sexual Health Research

48:57 - Closing Thoughts: Interoception, Self-Compassion & Why Sexual Health Matters

Papers mentioned in this episode:

• Effects of Group Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy versus Supportive Sex Education on Sexual Concordance and Sexual Response Among Women with Sexual Interest/Arousal Disorder
• Mindfulness-Based Sex Therapy Improves Genital-Subjective Arousal Concordance in Women With Sexual Desire/Arousal Difficulties
• Group mindfulness-based therapy significantly improves sexual desire in women
• Homework adherence in mindfulness-based cognitive interventions for female sexual dysfunction: a scoping review

Interested in my services? Check them out here

Join my 1:1 online program Re:Desire here.

Do you want to submit a listener question for the podcast? Here's the link