This week, Orla and Leanne are joined by two women from the Handmaids of Ireland for a powerful conversation about domestic abuse, child protection and their experiences of the Irish family court system.

Remaining anonymous as Handmaid One and Handmaid Two, they share their experiences of leaving abusive relationships, trying to protect their children, navigating Gardaí, Tusla and the courts, and why they believe major changes are needed within the system.

They also discuss coercive control, children’s voices, access and custody, the impact of not being believed, and why the Handmaids of Ireland movement was formed to support survivors and campaign for greater transparency and reform.

Content note: This episode includes discussion of domestic abuse, coercive control, rape and sexual violence, child sexual abuse allegations, suicidal thoughts, threats and attempted murder.

Timecodes

[00:00] – Sponsor message: Kitchens by Act Fast
[01:17] – Introducing the Handmaids of Ireland
[02:04] – Handmaid One shares her story
[03:18] – Concerns around possible child sexual abuse
[05:39] – Reporting concerns to Tusla and Gardaí
[07:20] – Children making disclosures
[08:18] – Safety orders, harassment and family court
[10:13] – Section 20 reports and children’s voices
[11:10] – Child protection case conferences
[13:19] – The court assessor becomes involved
[14:07] – When the case begins to turn against Handmaid One
[16:46] – Handmaid Two shares her experience
[17:10] – Why survivors feel unheard in family court
[19:18] – Domestic abuse versus “high conflict”
[20:55] – Coercive control and parenting
[22:16] – Recognising sexual violence and rape
[24:10] – When trauma is used against victims
[26:20] – “Do I have to die for my children to be protected?”
[28:30] – Court-ordered access and protecting children
[30:44] – Why protection should come first
[32:48] – The Handmaids as a support network
[35:33] – When abuse is weaponised against survivors
[38:45] – Why the Handmaids of Ireland was formed
[40:47] – Children growing up and speaking for themselves
[43:50] – Calls for wider family law reform
[45:50] – Handmaid One returns to her court assessor experience
[47:12] – The impact on her daughter
[50:59] – Feeling that asking for help caused further trauma
[53:49] – The financial cost of fighting a family court case
[55:19] – Asking the public to start asking questions
[57:32] – How to support the Handmaids of Ireland
[59:19] – Final thoughts and thanks