225 Have you ever wished your husband were better at understanding emotions, navigating difficult conversations, or creating emotional intimacy between you?

In this episode, I’m exploring an idea that has helped me think differently about my own marriage: you don’t have to contribute equal amounts of skillfulness to your relationship for things to get better.

I introduce the idea of “units of capacity”— a way of thinking about the skills and energy each of you has available in different situations. Our capacities vary depending on our strengths, stress levels, and what’s happening in our lives. And we each bring different strengths to our relationships.

Recognizing those differences can help you create a better marriage.

For highly sensitive women, this can be especially important. You may have a natural knack for noticing emotional shifts, recognizing patterns, and thinking deeply about your relationship. But when your husband doesn’t have those same skills, it can be frustrating——and we can lose sight of the capacity we have to make things better ourselves.

I’ll share how to recognize and use the relational capacity you already have to influence your marriage in a positive direction, while continuing to develop even more of it...

.... and help you shift your focus from wishing your husband would change to creating more connection and navigating difficult moments more skillfully together, so you can have a better relationship.

Plus, you'll get some practical ways to help you put this idea into practice!

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher. Leave a review in Apple Podcasts —we are SO grateful!
• Check out the Start Here Podcast Pathway for a suggested route through the most important episodes to start with or review — the ones that will help you feel calmer, more secure, and more hopeful in your relationship.
• Find Hannah at hspmarriagecoaching.com

Have you ever looked at the life and relationships you have—and the ones you want to have—and wondered what it would take to actually feel the way you want to feel in them?

I know that question intimately.

When my boys were little, I knew I loved my family—but I was overwhelmed, reactive, impatient, and increasingly cut off from the light, loving version of myself I knew was in there somewhere. I didn't feel like myself anymore, or feel my love that much.

What happened next completely changed the way I understood myself, my emotions, and my relationships—and ultimately propelled me into the happiness I now have in my marriage.

In this very personal episode, I'm taking you back to that season of my life—and to the discoveries along the way to the present that helped me feel more at home in myself, lighter in my body and heart, more secure in myself, and so much more able to enjoy the people I loved, including my husband.

Because even though at first I just wanted to feel better, it ultimately unlocked something much bigger: the foundation and skillset I needed to create and sustain the relationships and life I really wanted.

It changed the way I showed up with my partner and kids—and gave me the foundation for true happiness in marriage.

And eventually, it became the beginning of the work I now teach highly sensitive women who want to feel more steady, loving, connected, and like the best of themselves in their own lives and relationships.

If you've ever wondered what it really takes to create the kind of inner life—and the kind of marriage—you deeply want, this one is for you.

SHOW NOTES:

Learn more about Foundations of Emotional Well-Being for HSPs, and join the cohort here. Doors close October 4th for this round.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher. Leave a review in Apple Podcasts —we are SO grateful!
• Check out the Start Here Podcast Pathway for a suggested route through the most important episodes to start with or review — the ones that will help you feel calmer, more secure, and more hopeful in your relationship.

223 There are two parts of you that are always shaping your marriage, often far more deeply than you realize. So you want to really understand them –especially as an HSP.

Together they are always deeply influencing how you feel in your marriage, and how you are interacting with your partner, for better or for worse.

Although you can—and should—look at these two parts of yourself individually, they're are deeply interconnected and constantly influencing each other. So we have to understand how to look at and work with them together, if we want the most sway over how we feel in our relationship.

In this episode, we will use metaphor and science to look at how your nervous system and your mind work together to shape the way you experience your husband, your emotions, and the difficult moments that inevitably happen in marriage.

You'll see why the same situation can feel completely different depending on what's happening inside you—and how learning to work with both gives you more choice, clarity, connection, and access to the woman you want to be in your marriage…

…and to the marriage you really want to have.

The best part may well be the simple garden metaphor (mid–way through) that will help you understand this all in a way that really clicks, and will change the way you think about how much influence you really do have when it comes to making your relationship the loving one you want.

SHOW NOTES:

Learn more about Foundations of Emotional Well-Being for HSPs, and join the cohort here.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher. Leave a review in Apple Podcasts —we are SO grateful!
• Check out the Start Here Podcast Pathway for a suggested route through the most important episodes to start with or review — the ones that will help you feel calmer, more secure, and more hopeful in your relationship.