This week, the boys are roasting the absolute worst holiday characters ever created — the ones that make you wish Christmas came with a recall policy. From Zwarte Piet, the racist relic the Netherlands refuses to retire, to Spuds MacKenzie’s beer-soaked Santa phase. We’re unwrapping the tackiest, creepiest, and most problematic icons of the season, and asking: who thought this was festive?

Then in Emails From The Listeners, a listener writes in about his girlfriend’s ex getting the backdoor access he never could, and the guys try to explain America’s insane tipping culture to a confused Italian newcomer. In News, we cover the bizarre case of the woman convicted of cyber farting — yes, literal weaponized flatulence. And finally, Not The Drag Queens returns with the infuriating story of an Oklahoma teen who brutally assaulted two girls and somehow got probation — proving once again, it’s not the drag queens hurting people. It’s the privileged bros the justice system keeps protecting.

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The bracket chaos continues! The guys are back with Part 2 of The Best Excuses to Leave a Party Early Tournament, and it’s time to crown the ultimate champion of social bailouts. The excuses are getting wilder, grosser, and way too relatable — from “food poisoning” to “my therapist said I should say no more often,” no lie is safe and no exit strategy goes unjudged. It’s the hilarious and weirdly informative showdown you didn’t know you needed — and trust us, this one’s a can’t-miss episode for anyone who’s ever Irish-goodbyed before dessert.

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It’s tournament time, baby! The guys kick off The Best Excuses to Leave a Party Early Tournament (Part 1) — where 32 of the funniest, grossest, and most creative excuses go head-to-head to see which one reigns supreme. This episode is for everyone who’s ever faked an emergency to escape small talk. (We are looking at YOU!)

Plus, in this week’s listener emails, one guy’s girlfriend has gone full Christmas in October, another can’t deal with his partner’s overpacking, and the news gets wild with an NBA gambling scandal involving mob ties and insider bets. Then, in Not the Drag Queens, a so-called “family values” guy in Indiana gets busted for the exact crimes he’s been preaching against — proving once again, it’s never the drag queens.

Got a question, comment or topic for us to cover? Let us know! Send us an email at fratchatpodcast@gmail.com or follow us on all social media:

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• Chris ‘CMO’ Moore:
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