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Is 50/50 custody really fair? Should you co-parent or parallel parent? In the Season 5 premiere, divorce mediators Alex Howard and Amanda Silver share the divorce myths they believed when they started, and why hundreds of cases changed their minds.

Why a 50/50 default can shortchange kids when one parent carried the load, why the conflict often changes instead of ending after divorce, why you don't need cheating or abuse to leave, and why Alex now starts from parallel parenting instead of co-parenting.

Alex and Amanda talk about:
- Why the person who leaves isn't always the one who ended the marriage
- The spouse who pushes you to make the call so they don't have to
- Why 50/50 isn't automatically fair, and quality time vs equal time
- Why you don't have to answer every message from your ex
- Leaving with no cheating and no abuse: "You can literally just be unhappy"
- Co-parenting vs parallel parenting: who decides braces and who decides bedtime

If you are dealing with abuse or feel unsafe: In Canada, call or text 9-8-8 (Suicide Crisis Helpline). Ontario: Assaulted Women's Helpline 1-866-863-0511 (24/7). In the US: National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788. If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed by our podcast guest are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast. We value diverse perspectives and aim to provide a platform for thoughtful discussion and exploration of different ideas.

Got any comments, suggestions or queries? We'd love to hear from you! DM us on Instagram @dirty.laundry.podcast to be featured on one of our upcoming episodes.

Also, don't forget to rate and review our show on your favourite podcast player.

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Mary Anne Popescu is the Executive Director of the Ontario Association for Family Mediation and a practicing family mediator of over two decades. In this encore episode, she introduces the concept that changed both her practice and her own marriage: the attack-defend loop, and how naming it in real time can stop a conversation from spiraling.

She and Alex and Amanda dig into insight mediation, why she prefers the phrase "families experiencing high conflict behavior" over the label "high conflict," and how future-focused questions can unlock genuinely creative solutions for even the most complex blended families. They also talk about the grief that underlies every separation, no matter who initiated it, and why control over how your story ends is often the biggest reason people choose mediation over litigation.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed by our podcast guest are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast. We value diverse perspectives and aim to provide a platform for thoughtful discussion and exploration of different ideas.

Got any comments, suggestions or queries? We'd love to hear from you! DM us on Instagram @dirty.laundry.podcast to be featured on one of our upcoming episodes.

Also, don't forget to rate and review our show on your favourite podcast player.

Send us Fan Mail

Most people think the first step after deciding to divorce is calling a lawyer. It isn't — and starting there can cost you time, money, and options you didn't know you had.

In this encore episode, Alex and Amanda break down the entire divorce process from the beginning: why taking a beat before making any decisions matters, how to gather information and build the right team, the five different processes available (kitchen table agreements, mediation, collaborative law, lawyer negotiation, and court) and how to choose the right one for your situation, what actually goes into a separation agreement, and the financial disclosure rights every spouse has regardless of how finances were kept during the marriage. They also cover what happens after the agreement is signed, including annual reviews and why you don't have to file for a legal divorce right away.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed by our podcast guest are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast. We value diverse perspectives and aim to provide a platform for thoughtful discussion and exploration of different ideas.

Got any comments, suggestions or queries? We'd love to hear from you! DM us on Instagram @dirty.laundry.podcast to be featured on one of our upcoming episodes.

Also, don't forget to rate and review our show on your favourite podcast player.