What if desire isn't the problem? What if the real issue is that you've never been taught how to develop it?

Jay Stringer is a licensed mental health counselor and author of Unwanted and the new book Desire. His original research on over 4,000 adults found that our longings, attractions, and even our unwanted behaviors carry real information about our stories. In this episode, he joins Bridgett and Lauren to talk about how desire shapes dating, marriage, family dynamics, and faith.

Jay breaks down why most people over-develop one area of desire - career, s-x, comfort - while neglecting others. He shares his own experience of navigating family loyalty, dating, and the patterns he brought into his marriage. He explains why contempt destroys relationships faster than almost anything else, and why curiosity about your own story is one of the most attractive things you can bring to a relationship.

This episode also gets into what sexual maturity looks like before marriage, why the conservative and progressive approaches to desire both miss the mark, and what it means to form your desires rather than fear them or follow them blindly.

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Watch this video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/WrpgNB9CXIw

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Connect with Jay at jay-stringer.com or on Instagram @jay_stringer_. His book Desire: The Longings Inside Us and the New Science of How We Love, Heal, and Grow is available now!

Grab the book here: https://a.co/d/06rRK8CL

Get the companion workbook here: http://a.co/d/0dyoF4tz--If you're a Christian who wants to date with clarity and self-awareness, this is where you start.📱Follow @datinganddesire on Instagram for updates and conversation.https://www.instagram.com/datinganddesire--Connect with Bridgett:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bridgettblood/Website: https://bridgettblood.com/Coaching | Free Resources | RECLAIM Cohort📓Get the free Value-Based Boundaries in Dating Guide: https://stan.store/bridgettblood/p/get-my-valuebased-boundaries-guide---Connect with Lauren:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurenmathues/Website: https://laurenmathues.com/Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing. Get the free guide here: https://laurenmathues.com/--

Bridgett and Lauren think flirting deserves a reputation upgrade - especially in the church. In this episode, they talk about why most Christians have been taught to suppress one of the most natural ways we connect with people, and what it costs us when we do. They get into the fears that keep people from flirting - fear of rejection, fear of being misread, fear of being labeled "too much" - and share what has actually helped them take the risk anyway. Lauren breaks down the nonverbal side of flirting and shares research that might change how bold you're willing to be. Bridgett talks about what she's learned from practicing low-stakes connection as a single woman and why the voices that show up when you try to flirt are worth listening to. If you've ever wanted to connect with someone but talked yourself out of it before you even smiled, this one's for you.

Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/hSOzGp4vOGM

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If you're a Christian who wants to date with clarity and self-awareness, this is where you start.

📱Follow ⁠⁠@datinganddesire⁠⁠ on Instagram for updates and conversation.

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Connect with Bridgett: ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

⁠⁠Website⁠⁠ | Coaching| Free Resources| RECLAIM Cohort

📓Get the free ⁠⁠Value-Based Boundaries in Dating Guide⁠⁠

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Connect with Lauren: ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠Website⁠⁠

Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing. ⁠⁠Get the free guide here!