Dust down your power converters and wave farewell to that glistening binary sunset, because the Ctrl Alt Critique crew are making the jump to lightspeed! To fire up the new year, the trio are duelling with George Lucas’s 1977 cinematic behemoth, Star Wars: A New Hope.

Join Bailey, as he engineers a fool proof architectural fix for the Death Star’s exposed thermal exhaust; miraculously achieving in minutes what took Disney an entire prequel movie to explain. Ad, meanwhile, is channelling his inner intergalactic designer, pitching swanky new lightsaber concepts that are as handy for excavating gardens as they are at dismembering Sith Lords. Speaking of saber modifications, Amber has discovered a dozen or so ways to turn the Jedi’s elegant weapon into a DIY masterpiece, proving that Kyber crystal diversity is the answer to resorting peace within a hostile galaxy.

Tired of being a nerf herder stuck in a bar full of scum and villainy? Then why not pal up with a lovable rogue and set a course for Ctrl Alt Critique’s social nebula. Together we can navigate the shifting dunes of Tatooine’s TikTok, wade through the murky swamplands of Dagobah’s Discord, and fend off any Instagram Imperials looking to torch your beloved moisture farms!

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Instead of the usual attempted dissection of a blockbuster, this week the trio are digging into a stocking full of listener questions. It’s a barmy festive special where innocent inquiries spiral into sheer madness.

Join Ad, as he educates the room on the concept of "deuteragonist"; a term Amber is convinced is entirely made up until she’s proven hilariously wrong.

Bailey, meanwhile, vents his frustration with heroes who are oblivious to scheming side-characters, while championing those who transition from push-arounds to unstoppable beasts.

Amber, on the other hand, presents her strict criteria for what defines "festive cinema," with an actual presentation at hand. We also learn of her earliest special interest; one that's less concerned with celluloid and more to do with hydraulic brushes often found at your local carwash.

Feeling the holiday spirit? Then grab your baubles and jingle on over to our Discord grotto, TikTok workshop, and Instagram wonderland.

Music used in this episode:

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Fasten your seatbelts and ground yourselves, dear Critters, for we are about to embark on quite the crash landing. That's right, we are engaging our distress beacons and plummeting straight toward Will Smith and M. Night Shyamalan’s planet-sized catastrophe, After Earth.

Do you despise this movie? In which case, you have found your sanctuary. We're serving up a healthy balance of unfiltered hate and outright absurdity that will leave you feeling more satisfied than an Ursa at an empath convention.

Join Amber as she attempts to 'ghost' her own cravings, contemplating whether a static-laden Life Suit is the ultimate solution to her current dietary quarrels. Ad, meanwhile, keeps his pyrotechnic skullduggery to a minimum this week. Instead, he dreams up a new service that is as erotic as it is lucrative. Bailey, on the other hand, has visions of a Life Suit modification that might be a social miracle for the gang, even if it risks rendering one of Ad's special abilities well and truly redundant.

Survived the fateful landing? Then race through the Instagram jungle, climb the TikTok volcano, and hit that emergency beacon to signal rescue from the Discord dropship, where you'll be well and truly safe from Big Willie's weekend madness.

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠