Épisodes

  • DARVO
    Jun 24 2026

    When someone hurts you… and somehow you end up apologizing?
    Yeah. That’s not miscommunication — that’s DARVO.
    In this episode, Ruby breaks down how people flip the script using Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim & Offender, why it leaves you doubting your own reality, and how to reclaim your narrative.
    Gentle, grounding, and deeply validating.
    DARVO explained, what is DARVO, gaslighting examples, emotional abuse signs, manipulation tactics in relationships, narcissistic abuse patterns, trauma responses, self‑gaslighting explained, relationship red flags, psychological manipulation, accountability avoidance, toxic partner behavior, healing from abuse, trauma‑informed content

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    11 min
  • The Childhood Coping Skills You Didn’t Know Were Coping Skills
    Jun 17 2026

    In this episode of Awkwardish, I’m unpacking the childhood “quirks,” “habits,” and “phases” we were told to grow out of — and revealing how many of them were actually coping skills we built to survive environments that didn’t know how to support us.


    From perfectionism to people‑pleasing, from disappearing into our imagination to becoming the “strong one,” I’m breaking down how these patterns formed, why they made sense at the time, and how they still show up in our adult lives. And more importantly, I’m talking about what healing looks like when you finally give your younger self the compassion they never got.


    This episode is honest, a little tender, and very much a love letter to the kid you used to be — the one who did the best they could with what they had.


    If you’ve ever wondered why you react the way you do, why certain things feel “too much,” or why you’re exhausted from carrying roles you never asked for, this one’s for you.


    What you’ll hear in this episode:


    • Hidden coping skills we developed without realizing it

    • How childhood environments shape adult behavior

    • Why your younger self deserves compassion

    • How to gently unlearn survival patterns

    • What healing actually looks like in real life



    Tagline:


    Healing doesn’t always look graceful — sometimes it looks honest.

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    14 min
  • I’m Functioning… But at What Cost?
    Jun 10 2026

    I’m functioning… but the truth is, it’s draining me in ways I don’t always admit out loud. In this episode, I open up about burnout, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure to keep performing when my mind and body are begging for rest. I talk about the guilt of slowing down, the fear of disappointing people, and the hidden cost of always being “the strong one.”


    If you’ve ever pushed through overwhelm, ignored your own limits, or felt like you’re running on fumes while still trying to look put‑together, this episode will hit home. I’m sharing my real experience with burnout, boundaries, mental health, and the messy process of learning to rest before I break.

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    10 min
  • I Love People Until I Don’t: The Social Battery Episode
    Jun 5 2026

    I Love People Until I Don’t: The Social Battery Episode is a chaotic‑relatable deep dive into why you can go from “I’m thriving!!” to “I must leave immediately” in the span of one conversation.


    This episode walks through the rise, peak, and dramatic collapse of your social energy — especially if you’re neurodivergent, introverted, or simply a person who can only be perceived for so long before your soul evaporates.


    We talk masking fatigue, overstimulation, emotional labor, and the exact moment your brain hits zero and starts buffering. It’s validating, funny, and painfully accurate for anyone whose social battery is basically a Victorian child with asthma.


    If you’ve ever Irish‑exited a party to protect your sanity, this one’s for you.


    Stay in touch:


    Instagram and Threads: @awkwardrube |

    @awkwardishpodcast

    TikTok: @awkwardrube

    Youtube: @awkwardrube @awkwardishpods


    Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):

    https://uppbeat.io/t/dope-cat/cloud-wonder

    License code: IRALAVWDLUKFB502

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    17 min
  • My Brain Won’t Shut Up and Honestly… Same
    May 27 2026

    My brain won’t shut up — and honestly, neither will the anxiety, overthinking, and late‑night “what if” spirals that keep me wide awake. In this episode, I talk about racing thoughts, intrusive worries, and that overwhelming mental noise that makes everyday life feel like a full‑time job. If you deal with anxiety, overthinking, or a mind that refuses to chill, you’re not alone — and this episode is basically a hug for anyone whose thoughts run the show.


    Keep in touch:


    Instagram and Threads: @awkwardrube |

    @awkwardishpodcast

    TikTok: @awkwardrube

    Youtube: @awkwardrube | @awkwardishpods


    Music: Anomaly by Purrple Cat | https://purrplecat.com/

    Music promoted by https://www.chosic.com/free-music/all/

    Creative Commons CC BY-SA 3.0

    https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

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    11 min
  • The Complicated Reasons We Stay
    May 20 2026

    Why do people stay in harmful relationships?

    It’s never simple — and it’s never just weakness. In this sensitive Awkwardish episode, Ruby unpacks the complicated mix of love, fear, hope, and survival that keeps people in places they wish they could leave.


    This conversation explores:


    • Trauma bonding and attachment

    • The myths about “just leaving”

    • The emotional and practical barriers

    • Why survivors blame themselves



    If you’ve ever stayed longer than you wanted to, or judged yourself for not leaving sooner — this episode is for you.

    You’re not broken. You were surviving with the tools you had.

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    6 min
  • Anger As a Phase of Healing
    May 13 2026

    Anger isn’t me “losing it” — it’s my body finally telling the truth.

    In this episode, I talk about the anger I spent years swallowing, why it shows up in healing, and how I learned to stop treating it like a personal failure.


    I get into:


    • ​the guilt we carry around feeling angry
    • ​how gendered conditioning teaches us to turn anger inward
    • ​the cultural and religious messages that silence many
    • ​the grief underneath being angry at one’s past self
    • ​what our anger may actually be trying to tell us



    If you’re in your anger era, you’re not failing;

    you’re healing — out loud, on purpose, and without apology.


    Follow me:

    Instagram — @awkwardishpodcast | @awkwardrube | @redpetalproject

    TikTok — @awkwardrube | @redpetalproject

    YouTube — awkwardishpods | awkwardrube


    Music: Amb:delirium by Le Gang

    free download at https://www.mellypark.com/P7W2PC

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    15 min
  • When Healing Feels Boring, Slow, or Uninspiring
    May 6 2026

    Healing isn’t always cinematic. Sometimes it’s quiet, slow, and deeply unremarkable — but still sacred.

    In this episode, we explore the “boring” seasons of healing: the plateaus, the pauses, and the subtle progress that rarely gets celebrated.

    If you’ve ever felt like nothing is happening, this conversation reminds you that stillness is not regression — it’s recalibration.


    Some seasons aren’t about blooming. They’re about rooting.


    Keywords: healing journey, mental health podcast, emotional growth, trauma‑informed healing, self‑care, slow recovery, gentle progress, authenticity, mindfulness, self‑compassion, nonlinear healing, personal development, self‑love, resilience, inner peace


    Music: Midpoint. - Unminus.com

    Artist: JNGS

    URL: http://unminus.com

    Licence: Unminus License

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    8 min