Masterfully read, depressing yet thoughtful book

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes. But I came to this book from Dan Savage's recommendation. So I'd say anyone who reads it better be pretty sex positive and open mined, taboo breaking and advanced, because it isn't for the faint of heart.

If you’ve listened to books by Daniel Bergner before, how does this one compare?

Nope, I had never heard of him before this Wednesday, Oct 8 2014.

What about Charles Pasternak’s performance did you like?

Haunting. Passionate. He does an absolutely masterful job with this book. He has a very effective way of channeling the insecure guy, the older, expoerienced woman, the professor, the college-educated woman - all with excellent voice and - I guess 'acting'. You can tell when he is speaking through the true material of the book, versus a quote from a test subject or an authority. My first move after finishing this the second time, was to see what other books he had narrated and found nonw.

If you could give What Do Women Want? a new subtitle, what would it be?

"Women Want Variety and Don't Want Monogamy
Hold on to your donuts, men"

Any additional comments?

I saw another comment on here that talked about how they listened to the book and said that he never answers "what they wan't. I said to myself, 'what'? The book beats on the point from the first moments and first vingette. Daniel Bergner starts from the very beginning about what they want. What do they want? Just like 50 Shades of Grey - they want to be taken, and they sure as s*it don't want monogamy, at their core instinct level. They want options. Not covered in the book are the external forces cause the monogamy to work - the security, the money, the house/boat/car/yard and percieved & debated long-term mental health and stability of their children. I am a child of a divorced couple and recently my own divorce was finalized. Kind of disenchanted with long term stuff at the moment. In this book, it is explained that studies show women are as virile and interested in variety of partners as men are, if not more so. **At least** as much as men are. For what it's worth I actually agree with that premise.

I am pretty good looking man in my 30's and with this book in mind and on my third play through I watched yesterday when I was out & about how women with their husbands in tow, would look at me, hold their stare and all but approach me. Absolutely looking and sizing me up, wanting to try me out. I know that "look" - like - "Geesh Dianne I'd sure like to give that one a try". I know I am superior in every possible way to many men, but that their are some who are superior in every way to me, and no amount of counseling, cologne, haircuts, trips to the Balenciaga/Dolce & Gabanna, Givenchy outlet stores will ever change that. Exercise and grooming is the only tool we have to make ourselves - all things being equal - superior at least to a certain percentage of men, or superior to the former versions of ourselves. It's just a hard life fact. But I think that it's dangerous to compare us to primates and rats, because if we did that - and justified our acts that way - then murder and all sort of other things would then be somehow justified. I think of it like this - the author spends so much time comparing us to rats and primates. It's a slippery slope there. Rats and primates can commit rape, murder and theft without repercussions. We humans have big powerful brains that "know better" and that applies to sexuality.

For me, as a divorced guy who had to get married and divorced, then a failed relationship immediately after, to understand what they want (and I still don't know fully) this book just helped strengthen stuff I basically already thought. And that thought is that many if not all women get bored. Even if they are married to a Tom Brady super stud. They'll fantasize about the whole team, or a cheerleader. Or an opposing quarterback taking her from him, even if he's more attractive than the new guy. And that is ok! My fantasies are sometimes super awful. I found the book enlightening, interesting, convincing, and very depressing actually - but I was more ready for that than the average guy, I think. I am a man who actually likes a long term partner. Someone to really get to know, and then the sex gets better with time because I get more comfortable experimenting and. I am a more attentive and inventive and generous lover than most men (or so I am told). So I see this book as a tool. It's telling us it's ok for women to want to switch things up. He talks about the drugs that were being researched as the 'cure to monogamy' and I think that was a little over the top. It somehow weakened the whole point and him calling it that was a little too "on the nose" for me. It's well worth the money, it's something people should know about. And I wish it was longer than 6 hours. Felt too abbreviated in parts and I had to check if I had bought the abridged version, and I didn't. Kind of a novella maybe. Good book. And as I said in the other part of this review, the narrator, Charles Pasternak, is incredible in his narration. Almost kind of sensual in parts. I hope to read more by Bergner and hear more from Pasternak.

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24 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Ok, but there are better books to read

If you are just looking for a book to learn about women, then this book might be ok for you. But if you are interested in sex and sexual behavior from an evolutionary biology/human behavior standpoint, there are much better reads than What do Women Want. Available on Audible, I recommend The Red Queen by Matt Ridley and Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan. Stick to those!

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20 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Useful, but not for me!

As a gay man, I am always looking for books that enlighten me on interesting sexual studies concerning female sexuality. Call it research for my friends. This was an interesting book with several stories about different methods of sex research that has been conducted on the female. While it does not focus specifically on one aspect of female sexuality, its sometimes rambling nature had me distracted and thinking of other things. I am sure that to someone, it was very important information. For me, it was a "not so much" kind of thing.

There was amazing information in this book. Of note is the length at which many of the researchers go in order to properly identify the level of arousal in women. With men, it seems rather simple, but as proved once again that the female sex and sexuality is a very complicated and complex study. I was shocked to discover how very little research has been done in this field. It is definitely an uptapped field that will hopefully bear fruit in the upcoming years.

While fairly light reading (an effort to write on a clear and straight forward fashion is evident), I would not consider it fluff.

If you are interested in what makes women tick, this book is for you.

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11 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

illuminating and satisfying

a book every women should listen to not only for insight into the female libido, but also extremely satisfying for all of you out there who, like me, have spent their lives feeling as if the language that centers around female sexuality is so far off the mark as to be almost a fiction.

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7 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

meandering story of disjointed research studies .

a confused series of clinical studies and trials with no clear unifying narrative. The title lead you to believe the book will tell you what women want I know less of what women want after this book then when I started this book is boring and just dry.

the narrator is a slow monotone uninteresting voice

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5 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Interesting Book, TERRIBLE Narration!!!

Would you listen to What Do Women Want? again? Why?

No, I would read the book, the Narration was distracting and just plain terrible.

Were the concepts of this book easy to follow, or were they too technical?

A little of both, not exactly a light "read" but very interesting.

Would you be willing to try another one of Charles Pasternak’s performances?

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

Realizing what my wife probably wants...anything but me.

Any additional comments?

Depressing to understand that the person that you love is just frankly not interested in you...unfortunately it aligns with reality so the book states what has been obvious to me for three-quarters of my 15 year marriage.

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5 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Compilation of anegdotes, no evidence presented

What disappointed you about What Do Women Want??

The author discounts evolutionary biology and even FMRI scan studies, but instead presents only anegdotes, interviews and one scientifical study which has a much more plausable explanation (given in the book but only towards the end). The book proves only 2 things, proven before by many studies:1. That people who marry early are more dissatisfied with relationships (as heroines of all his anegdotes did)2. Evolution has equipped women with mechanism that allowes them to prevent damage to their reproductive organs during intercourse.This is it, and the book is only about blowing this out of proportion to prove author's agenda, which is allot more political than scientific

What aspect of Charles Pasternak’s performance would you have changed?

Charles's intonation could be more active during his reading

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4 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Well researched

I believe that the information was well researched but occasionally the author repeats a line to emphasize the statement. I find it annoying and suggestive that we are not paying attention. Outside of the small annoying parts. I found it to be very science based information and allowed me to understand it without playing along in hope's to hear something more than just sexy fluff.

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3 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

too technical, hard to follow, less useful info

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

a more technical person who is interested in finding out the workings of the brain (hormones and how they affect arousal); someone who wants to know the history of scientifically researches to find and improve a woman's sexual desires

What could Daniel Bergner have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

to be more concise and provide more useful tips on what actually women find attractive on a man

How did the narrator detract from the book?

he reads the book too slowly, with too many pauses between the words

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from What Do Women Want??

the earliest historical researches, or summarize them very briefly

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2 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

just terrible and boring

So boring book god dammit, like the first 8 chapters about a story that is so boring, kept skipping but the story never ends.. Gonna refund this for sure :)

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2 personnes ont trouvé cela utile