How is your negativity bias impacting your relationship, and taking you off course?

Today, we’re talking about that little voice we all have that tends to focus on what’s wrong in our relationship instead of what’s right.

Last week I shared a favorite quote from Jim Rohn, “Direction determines destination.” We talked about planes that are off course 90% of the time they’re in the air, but still manage to land in the appointed destination.

The critical element for a pilot is to keep refining that vector of direction, a little north…oh! Overshot it. Now a little south. North again. South a smidge. Until your destination is inevitable.

Similarly, when you’re able to focus on your direction—and all the tiny vectors of habits we talk about on this show—the destination of happily ever after takes care of itself.

But what happens when that negative voice pipes up saying, “You never flush the toilet?” Or “You never kiss me hello.”

1. We’ll talk about how this tiny voice is trying to help you, even if it’s really annoying
2. I’ll offer you 3 specific steps to mollify that voice
3. And, I’ll guide you with a discussion prompt so you and your partner can get past the negativity and connect with more hopefulness

Habit for Your Happily Ever After

This week’s habit for your happily ever after is to practice the negativity bias trifecta:

1. Name it
2. Tame it
3. Muscle up

Date Night Discussion

This week I invite you to talk about your negativity bias with your partner.

Tell your partner all the various disguises it might wear. Ask about your partner’s negativity bias.

I recommend naming it something goofy. Get a tchotchke that will help you develop a humorous relationship with your negativity bias.

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