This week on the porch we're smoking Super Boof — Leafly Strain of the Year 2024, which we absolutely did not know until right now — and processing a week that had absolutely no chill.

Both sets of girls had their last day of school. Hailey cried six times. She did the secret handshake at the kindergarten door one last time and did not hold it together. The teachers noticed.

Then we get into the mom friend thing — the real version. The pressure to make friends at school pickup, the feeling of being excluded that apparently doesn't stop when you turn 40, and the story of how Amanda spent an entire first year of kindergarten mom dinners drinking water while everyone else had cocktails because she had just gotten inseminated that afternoon and couldn't say so. The room absolutely clocked her as not their brand. She has spent two years making up for it.

Also: Hailey's number one parenting hack involves telling her kids their tongues turn purple when they lie. It works. She's passed it on to other families. We have thoughts. Plus Foodie Field Trip Fridays are officially in the calendar, 60 people showed up to movie night and somehow that felt normal, and we rank who makes the cut for the next one.

We're doing it for the plot. Come be part of the conversation.

Pull up a chair. 🌿