In this episode, Suzette Bray, a licensed marriage and family therapist, discusses the fundamentals of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and its practical applications for emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and managing intense feelings—especially relevant for those navigating alcohol-free living.

keywords

DBT, emotional regulation, distress tolerance, mental health, alcohol-free, coping skills, workbook, therapy, mindfulness, emotional intelligence

key topics

• Introduction to DBT and its origins
• Core skills of DBT: mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, interpersonal effectiveness
• Practical tools like the STOP skill and mammalian dive reflex
• DBT in schools and community settings
• The connection between trauma, mental health, and alcohol use

takeaways

• DBT was initially developed for chronically suicidal and self-harming individuals but is broadly useful for emotional regulation.
• Skills like the STOP technique and mammalian dive reflex can be practiced anywhere to manage high distress.
• Teaching DBT skills in schools helps normalize emotional health and provides early intervention.
• Alcohol often masks underlying emotional issues; addressing these with DBT can lead to lasting change.
• Consistent practice of coping skills is essential for them to become natural responses in high-stress moments.

guest:

Suzette Bray
https://www.suzettebray.com/

Follow ZPL:

• https://www.instagram.com/thezeroprooflife/
• https://www.thezeroprooflife.com/products/zpl-monthly-subscription

Follow the coaches:

• Brandi Babb – @brandi.babb (https://www.instagram.com/brandi.babb/)
• Karla Adkins – @karlakadkins (https://www.instagram.com/karlakadkins/)
• Carolyn Bennett – @thesoberempath (https://www.instagram.com/carolynbennett2.0/)
• Becca Snider – @becsnider (https://www.instagram.com/becsnider/)

If this conversation resonated with you, please follow the show and leave a review so more people can discover The Zero Proof Life. These conversations are for informational purposes only and not medical or mental health advice.

In this episode of The Zero Proof Life, hosts Karla Adkins and Lorna Wilson are back in the Limiting Belief Lab to break down one of the most common beliefs tied to alcohol use: "I deserve a drink."

Whether it shows up after a hard day, a big win, or a nerve-wracking moment, this belief is deeply woven into our culture — and in this episode, Karla and Lorna walk you through their four-step process to examine it, challenge it, and transform it.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "I deserve a drink" actually comes from a beautiful, healthy impulse — and how our thinking around it gets twisted
• The Backpack — the cultural, family, and social messages we've absorbed about drinking as a reward
• The Hard Drive — how our subconscious mind files these experiences and drives automatic behavior without fact-checking
• Real, personal stories from Karla and Lorna about what it actually cost them when they acted on this belief
• What your wiser self already knows — and how to start building new, truly restorative ways to celebrate and decompress

The Four Steps of the Limiting Belief Lab:

1. Name it — Write it down and single it out
2. Where did it come from? — Explore your backpack (external messages) and your hard drive (subconscious patterns)
3. What is it costing you? — Fact-check the belief against your real experience
4. What does your wiser self know? — Discover what genuinely fills your cup and restores you

Show Notes Recap — The Four Steps:

Step 1 — Name It: Write down the belief. "I deserve a drink." Naming it and isolating it is the first step to examining it.

Step 2 — Where Did It Come From?

• The Backpack: Think about what you absorbed growing up — from family, TV, workplace culture, happy hours. These messages were loaded into your backpack before you ever made a choice about drinking.
• The Hard Drive: Your subconscious mind files sequences — work hard → drink — without fact-checking them. These become automatic responses. The good news: science shows you can create new neural pathways.

Step 3 — What Is It Costing You? Write down specific examples from your own life. How did using alcohol as a reward actually make you feel? Did it deliver on its promise — or did it rob you of sleep, clarity, memory, or your sense of accomplishment?

Step 4 — What Does Your Wiser Self Know? What does she say? What does truly restoring yourself actually look like? What fills your cup, helps you wake up feeling proud, and sets you up for the next challenge?

Follow ZPL:

• https://www.instagram.com/thezeroprooflife/
• https://www.thezeroprooflife.com/products/zpl-monthly-subscription

Follow the coaches:

• Brandi Babb – @brandi.babb (https://www.instagram.com/brandi.babb/)
• Karla Adkins – @karlakadkins (https://www.instagram.com/karlakadkins/)
• Carolyn Bennett – @thesoberempath (https://www.instagram.com/carolynbennett2.0/)
• Becca Snider – @becsnider (https://www.instagram.com/becsnider/)

If this conversation resonated with you, please follow the show and leave a review so more people can discover The Zero Proof Life. These conversations are for informational purposes only and not medical or mental health advice.

What if just three words could shift everything about how you experience your alcohol-free life? In this episode, Karla Adkins shares the simple but powerful phrase that transformed her mindset and confidence on her alcohol-free journey: I don't drink.

Karla takes us back to an early moment in her sobriety — a turbulent solo flight where she had to decide how to respond when a fellow passenger offered to order her a drink. What happened next was small, but the impact was anything but.

In this episode, Karla breaks down:

• Why saying "I can't drink" or "I wish I could, but I can't" keeps you stuck in a mindset of deprivation and invites unwanted questions
• How shifting to "I don't drink" reclaims your power and reflects who you truly are
• Why your language around alcohol matters more than you think
• A simple challenge to try for yourself the next time someone offers you a drink

Whether you're brand new to the alcohol-free life or years into your journey, this episode is a great reminder that the words we use shape the way we feel — and sometimes, three little words really can make all the difference.

Episode Keywords: alcohol-free, sober curious, sobriety, mindset, language, confidence, anxiety, alcohol-free lifestyle, zero proof

Follow ZPL:

• https://www.instagram.com/thezeroprooflife/
• https://www.thezeroprooflife.com/products/zpl-monthly-subscription

Follow the coaches:

• Brandi Babb – @brandi.babb (https://www.instagram.com/brandi.babb/)
• Karla Adkins – @karlakadkins (https://www.instagram.com/karlakadkins/)
• Carolyn Bennett – @thesoberempath (https://www.instagram.com/carolynbennett2.0/)
• Becca Snider – @becsnider (https://www.instagram.com/becsnider/)

If this conversation resonated with you, please follow the show and leave a review so more people can discover The Zero Proof Life. These conversations are for informational purposes only and not medical or mental health advice.