How has Dad Always helped you redefine fatherhood after your loss?

This episode, released in 2023 on The Miscarriage Dad's Podcast, is reappropriated from another podcast I hosted called "Welcome To Fatherhood".

SHOW NOTES

A doctor shrugs after telling a couple they’re going to lose their twins, and that single moment becomes a scar you can feel years later. Brandon Byrnes joins me to share the full story: the shock of finding out they were expecting twins, the joy of watching them move on an ultrasound, weeks of bed rest and fear, and then the frantic drive to the hospital as the pregnancy ends. We don’t sensationalize miscarriage and pregnancy loss, but we also don’t soften what it can do to a marriage, a nervous system, and a parent’s sense of safety.

We talk about the part that often goes unspoken: fatherhood grief. Brandon describes how military training helped him function in chaos and how the real emotional impact landed later, like a constant noise in the background of his life. We dig into medical trauma, anger, and the helpless “solve it” instinct many men feel when there’s nothing left to fix. If you’ve ever searched for support after miscarriage, coping with infant loss, or how to help your spouse through pregnancy loss, you’ll hear language you can actually use.

We also make room for meaning. Brandon shares how they honored their twins through remembrance, why naming Taylor and Jaden mattered, and how listening without advice can become a form of healing for dads who don’t have many places to put this kind of pain.

If this conversation helps, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more parents and partners can find it.

SUPPORT PATHWAY

If you are a bereaved dad who's quietly struggling to cope with baby loss and you'd like to talk one-on-one, let's have a FREE private 30-minute conversation.

Go to dadalways.com for more information.

Show Music from Soundstripe

European Sunrise & God Remembers by Anthony Catacoli

Among The Stars (Stripped) by Violet Mourning

Drift by Bobo Renthlei

How has Dad Always helped you redefine fatherhood after your loss?

Grief doesn’t end when the world stops checking on you. Sometimes it waits, quiet and contained, until another loss cracks the container and everything rushes back. This week concludes my conversation rich conversation with Azher Rubanni, a dad who has lived with infant loss for two decades, and he shares the moment he realized that staying in “loss” wasn’t serving him and that growth can live in giving, purpose, and remembering his son, Hashim, as a gift.

We explore what resurfaced grief for Azher years later: business collapse, identity loss, divorce, and the shock of losing a parent. The conversation gets painfully specific about triggers that many grieving fathers recognize but rarely say out loud: birthdays that line up with the day your baby was born, pregnancies in the family, and watching kids grow into the age your child would have been. We also name a stigma that keeps dads isolated and then flip it with one clear reframe: grief is love. Tears are not proof you’re failing. They’re proof your bond is still real.

Then we get practical. Azher shares the benefits of expressive writing for grief and trauma. You’ll hear a structured letter-writing framework built for dads who want a purposeful process: name the loss, name what you want, decide who walks with you, choose a next step, and write directly to your child. We close by discussing the STILL method, a method developed by Azher, and a set of resources for those interested in learning more.

You can find these gifts here.

If you’re carrying miscarriage grief, stillbirth grief, or infant loss grief, come listen, share this with another dad, and leave a review so more fathers can find a way to move with grief rather than trying to move on.

SUPPORT PATHWAY

If you are a bereaved dad who's quietly struggling to cope with baby loss and you'd like to talk one-on-one, let's have a FREE private 30-minute conversation.

Go to dadalways.com for more information.

Theme Music: "Love Letter” was created using AI as a creative tool, with lyrics and direction shaped by the personal experiences and emotional intent of the host.

Show Music from Soundstripe

Ocean Blue & Belvedere by Cody Martin

How has Dad Always helped you redefine fatherhood after your loss?

How do you live after your baby dies without feeling like you’re betraying them by surviving? That question sits at the center of my conversation with Azher Rubanni, a father who lost his son Hashim in a full-term stillbirth 20 years ago. We get honest about what many dads feel but rarely say: the pressure to be the “strong one,” the instinct to suppress emotion to protect your partner and kids, and the quiet fear that if the pain ever dulls, you’ll be forgetting your child.

Azher walks us through the day everything changed, including the moment he decided, in a hospital car park, that he would become the supporter no matter what it cost him inside. We talk about telling his three sons their brother would not be coming home, the cultural forces that tried to keep children away from grief, and why inviting kids into the truth can build trust for life. We also explore how different grieving styles inside a marriage can create distance, and why the workplace can become both a refuge and a trap, especially for fathers who feel they must “perform” competence while falling apart.

Then we shift to what helps over the long term. Azher offers a powerful alternative to the language of “healing” and “moving on”: reconciliation. He breaks it into three parts:

1. reconciling with yourself
2. reconciling with your child’s memory
3. and reconciling with the relationships you still have.

If you’re navigating stillbirth, miscarriage, baby loss, or parenting after loss, this one is a grounded, candid conversation for fathers and the people who love them.

Subscribe, share with a dad who needs it, and leave a review telling us what part hit home.

SUPPORT PATHWAY

If you are a bereaved dad who's quietly struggling to cope with baby loss and you'd like to talk one-on-one, let's have a FREE private 30-minute conversation.

Go to dadalways.com for more information.

Theme Music: "Love Letter” was created using AI as a creative tool, with lyrics and direction shaped by the personal experiences and emotional intent of the host.

Show Music from Soundstripe

Sunfrost by Cody Martin

First Bloom by Moments

Farewells by Shimmer