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It seems you can lead the horse to water and it will drink! You need patience! Patience is what is necessary to influence and persuade: taking people's maps into new territories.

Matching, pacing, and leading are foundational concepts in NLP, crucial for establishing rapport, understanding another person’s model of the world, and guiding them towards desired outcomes. It’s an important part of many NLP methods and processes, and can often be the key skill to making those processes effective. It’s also a very effective stand-alone tool for enhancing our own communication ability. BUT most people think of the mechanics of MPL, rather than MPL as an art.

MPL is a critical and basic skill that communication is based on. No one is going anywhere if you aren't good at matching and pacing.

Key Points:

· Matching, Pacing, and Leading work together

· If you lead too quickly or too strongly, you can lose rapport and will need to reestablish it through matching and pacing.

· You can match, pace, and lead someone in a brief interaction or over a series of longer interactions.

· You can apply these concepts with your friends and family, work relationships, sales interactions, consulting work, presentations, coaching, therapy, etc.

· Doing this successfully can reduce resistance to new ideas and perspectives, increase choice, and help us and others get what we want more easily.

The podcast also describes an exercise to help strengthen your skills.

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Many people find that as they move through life that they have to shift gears…a new job, a new career, family, divorce, move. Many people are looking for that “new path” when they study NLP.

As we prepare for these shifts, a great way to start is to develop a set of presuppositions and guiding questions to steer the change. This will ensure that the change will stay in place. This is the step before any planning or goal setting, or even belief changes.

This episode is a 5-step process to help you develop these presuppositions and guiding questions.

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NLP for Emotional Regulation

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the capacity to recognize, understand, and navigate your emotions and those of others. It includes Self-Awareness, Emotional Regulation, Motivation, Empathy, and Social Skills.

What is Emotional Regulation?

Emotional Regulation (ER) is a component of EQ strategies for managing their intensity and expression and intentionally creating emotional states you want. ER skills give you greater choice over your emotional experience.

NLP provides a variety of simple, effective, and unique methods and strategies for achieving this.

Why is ER Important?

ER is important because so much of our human experience involves our emotional states. Having the right emotional state for a situation can help us perform better.

NLP Methods for Regulating Emotions

Learning NLP

4-Tuple

Anchoring

Submodality Changes

Swish Patterns

Break State- pattern interrupt

Meta Model

Modeling: sit up straight, smile, look up.

Reframing

Acting as if – one of the foundational pillars of NLP

Pleasant Emotional States

Intentionally experiencing and amplifying states such as:

- Gratitude

- Appreciation

- Peace

- Confidence

- Curiosity:

Having access to pleasant/resourceful states can help us maintain physical and emotional health and energize us during difficult situations or periods in our lives.

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