What happens when a hyper-achiever tries to master meditation in ten days? For me, it ended with violently throwing up in front of a hundred silent meditators and carrying that trauma for years. But that embarrassing failure became the doorway to the practice that has transformed my life more than anything else.In this solo episode, I share my winding journey with meditation, from that disastrous ten-day silent retreat where I tried to be the "best meditator in the room," to finding a teacher who helped me begin again by telling me, “Don’t meditate.” I open up about how meditation helped me stop worrying obsessively about workplace conversations, taught me to trust my body's intelligence, and eventually led to a spiritual awakening during COVID that shifted how I see everything, even pain itself.

To learn more about your host, Stan Ajemian:

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/stanajemian

Email: stan@beingthechangecoaching.com

Website: beingthechangecoaching.com

At the age of 12, James Davis-Massey made one of the most difficult decisions of his life: he stood before a court and divorced his parents. It was a soulful decision, one that defied logic and wasn't driven by what his head or even his heart told him, but by a deeper knowing that he needed to move toward safety and love. Growing up in an environment marked by abuse, alcoholism, and neglect, James knew deep within himself that he needed safety and love, even if it meant making an extraordinary choice that most children never face.

That moment of soulful decision-making became the foundation for who James is today. He moved in with his grandparents, and heard his grandmother's words, "James, you can be and do anything you want to be and do," which became a guiding light that he carries with him to this day. James developed a fierce independence. By age 14, he was working nearly full-time to support himself. While this responsibility forced him to grow up quickly, it also gave him the resilience and grit that would shape his future.

Now, James is the co-founder of The Human Blueprint, where he helps leaders, executives, teams, and organizations understand the power of human-centered leadership. His approach integrates the five dimensions of a leader—head, heart, gut, body, and soul—to help people align with their higher purpose and become their most powerful, influential, and fulfilled selves. From his early trauma to his work today, James's journey is a testament to the transformative power of making soulful decisions and serving others from a place of deep authenticity.

To learn more about James Davis-Massey:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jdavis2/Website: https://www.thehumanblueprint.com/

To learn more about your host, Stan Ajemian:LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/stanajemianEmail: stan@beingthechangecoaching.comWebsite: beingthechangecoaching.com

Aaron Simmons met his wife, Polly, in the Peace Corps, and together they built a life filled with art, literature, and deep partnership. They married, bought a house, and had three children. Then, three years ago, Polly died suddenly from a pulmonary embolism, leaving Aaron to navigate life as a solo father and to wrestle with unanswerable questions.

In the midst of his grief, Aaron discovered Polly's journals—pages and pages of her thoughts, insights, and humor written over the years. As he began writing through his own pain in the middle of the night, an idea emerged: what if they could write a book together, even after her death?

In this conversation, Aaron shares how he's keeping Polly present for his children, how writing became both his healing and their collaboration, and why he believes grief never truly resolves—it simply becomes part of who we are. He reflects on the tension between moving forward and honoring what was lost, and offers wisdom for anyone sitting with loss they didn't choose.

This is a story about creating beauty from loss, honoring the dead by living fully, and understanding that healing isn't linear—it's a mosaic.

To Learn more about Aaron Simmons:Website: aaronsimmons.name

To Buy the book widow— widower— widowest— a grief mosaicBook website: widowest.comPublisher website: www.motinabooks.com/book/widow-widower-widowest/Amazon:www.amazon.com/-/he/Aaron-Simmons-ebook/dp/B0FZ5HZZRM

To learn more about your host, Stan Ajemian:LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/stanajemianEmail: stan@beingthechangecoaching.comWebsite: beingthechangecoaching.com