Many parents worry that talking about sex, boundaries, consent, or online exposure will open doors too early—but real-world clinical experience shows the opposite. In this episode, Logan McIlwain explains why ongoing, everyday conversations actually reduce risky behavior and help kids feel safer turning to their parents instead of the internet.

Dana Kay brings a deeply personal perspective as a mom of a teen and a tween, naming the fear so many parents quietly carry: "Am I too early… or already too late?" Logan gently dismantles the pressure to get it perfect and replaces it with a more sustainable truth—presence matters more than perfection.

You'll learn how to use everyday "micro-moments" to build trust, how to respond calmly to sensitive questions, and how to reset conversations even if you feel behind. This episode is especially meaningful for parents of neurodivergent kids, where impulsivity and online exposure can make these conversations feel even heavier.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW

• Logan McIlwain: https://loganlcsw.com/
• Parent Parkway Book - https://amzn.to/4b2R1cD

KEY TAKEAWAYS
[03:00] Why this episode isn't about biology—but real-world parenting
[05:46] How inherited discomfort shapes today's parenting fears
[07:16] Why parents don't need all the answers
[08:30] What happens when parents stay silent
[12:30] Why micro-conversations beat "the big talk"
[16:15] The myth that talking leads to risky behavior
[19:27] Handling unexpected, sensitive questions calmly
[28:50] Resetting conversations when you feel behind
[29:26] Logan's one actionable parenting tip

MEMORABLE MOMENTS
"If you don't talk about these things with your children, Instagram will."
"We don't have to be perfect."
"Kids feel like parents talk at them."
"Circle back. That matters."
"You don't have to be perfect. You just have to be present."
"Understanding comes before teaching."

Dana Kay Resources:

🔗WEBSITES:

▶ https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/
▶ https://dana-kay.com/

👋SOCIALS:

▶ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/
▶ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute
▶ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/
▶ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute

📕INTERNATIONAL BEST SELLING BOOK:

▶ Thriving with ADHD – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/

💻FREE MASTERCLASS

▶ Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl

⭐COURSES & PROGRAMS

▶ ADHD Parenting Course – https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parentingadhd
▶ ADHD Thrive Method 4 Kids Program – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/packages/

Many parents worry that talking about sex, boundaries, consent, or online exposure will open doors too early—but real-world clinical experience shows the opposite. In this episode, Logan McIlwain explains why ongoing, everyday conversations actually reduce risky behavior and help kids feel safer turning to their parents instead of the internet.

Dana Kay brings a deeply personal perspective as a mom of a teen and a tween, naming the fear so many parents quietly carry: "Am I too early… or already too late?" Logan gently dismantles the pressure to get it perfect and replaces it with a more sustainable truth—presence matters more than perfection.

You'll learn how to use everyday "micro-moments" to build trust, how to respond calmly to sensitive questions, and how to reset conversations even if you feel behind. This episode is especially meaningful for parents of neurodivergent kids, where impulsivity and online exposure can make these conversations feel even heavier.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW

• Logan McIlwain: https://loganlcsw.com/
• Parent Parkway Book - https://amzn.to/4b2R1cD

KEY TAKEAWAYS
[03:00] Why this episode isn't about biology—but real-world parenting
[05:46] How inherited discomfort shapes today's parenting fears
[07:16] Why parents don't need all the answers
[08:30] What happens when parents stay silent
[12:30] Why micro-conversations beat "the big talk"
[16:15] The myth that talking leads to risky behavior
[19:27] Handling unexpected, sensitive questions calmly
[28:50] Resetting conversations when you feel behind
[29:26] Logan's one actionable parenting tip

MEMORABLE MOMENTS
"If you don't talk about these things with your children, Instagram will."
"We don't have to be perfect."
"Kids feel like parents talk at them."
"Circle back. That matters."
"You don't have to be perfect. You just have to be present."
"Understanding comes before teaching."

Dana Kay Resources:

🔗WEBSITES:

▶ https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/
▶ https://dana-kay.com/

👋SOCIALS:

▶ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/
▶ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute
▶ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/
▶ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute

📕INTERNATIONAL BEST SELLING BOOK:

▶ Thriving with ADHD – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/

💻FREE MASTERCLASS

▶ Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl

⭐COURSES & PROGRAMS

▶ ADHD Parenting Course – https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parentingadhd
▶ ADHD Thrive Method 4 Kids Program – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/packages/

A child can appear calm on a screen and unravel seconds after it turns off. That reaction isn't bad behavior or poor discipline — it's a nervous system crash driven by dopamine, overstimulation, and an abrupt loss of regulation.

In this episode of The Soaring Child Podcast, Dana Kay sits down with Sondra Bakinde and Mariana Gordon, co-founders of Mindful Mantis, to unpack what's really happening in a child's brain and body during screen time. They explain why screens activate the sympathetic nervous system, how dopamine crashes trigger fight-flight-freeze responses, and why kids with ADHD feel these shifts even more intensely.

You'll learn how to spot early signs of dysregulation before meltdowns erupt, why restriction alone often backfires, and how simple transitions can support a child's nervous system instead of overwhelming it. Sondra and Mariana share practical, realistic tools — including bridging the dopamine gap, predictable transitions, connection before direction, and their Pause & Play Method — all designed for real families, not perfect ones.

If screen time feels like a daily struggle in your home, this episode will help you reframe what's happening and respond with more calm, clarity, and confidence.

Links Mentioned in the Show

• https://www.themindfulmantis.com
• https://www.instagram.com/themindfulmantisinc

Key Takeaways
[01:21] Why parents immediately blame themselves
[02:13] Why this isn't a discipline issue
[04:39] How screens pull energy out of the body
[06:04] The dopamine crash explained
[08:27] Fight, flight, or freeze in kids
[11:16] Why ADHD intensifies screen reactions
[14:42] Early warning signs parents often miss
[18:11] Recovery vs restriction after screens
[20:06] Bridging the dopamine gap
[29:56] The Pause & Play Method introduced
[36:53] One grounding step parents can try today

Memorable Moments
"I am literally dealing with a feral raccoon in a human body."
"Screens pull energy outward into the eyes, the mind, the nervous system."
"That sudden shift can feel very threatening."
"The body whispers before it shouts."
"We focus less on restriction and more on recovery."
"Urgency feels like danger. Slowness feels like safety."
"Never end stimulation without grounding."

Dana Kay Resources:

🔗WEBSITES:

▶ https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/
▶ https://dana-kay.com/

👋SOCIALS:

▶ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ADHDThriveInstitute/
▶ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ADHDThriveInstitute
▶ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/adhd-thrive-institute/mycompany/
▶ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ph/adhdthriveinstitute/
▶ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adhd_thriveinstitute

📕INTERNATIONAL BEST SELLING BOOK:

▶ Thriving with ADHD – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/book/

💻FREE MASTERCLASS

▶ Free Reduce ADHD Symptoms Naturally Masterclass - https://bit.ly/3GAbFQl

⭐COURSES & PROGRAMS

▶ ADHD Parenting Course – https://info.adhdthriveinstitute.com/parentingadhd
▶ ADHD Thrive Method 4 Kids Program – https://adhdthriveinstitute.com/packages/