Zero shots on goal.
Four days after beating Columbus 2-1, D.C. United went to work against an Atlanta side sitting below them in the table and produced nothing. Sloppy, disjointed, no cohesive attack. Nathan Ordaz's effort from wide was the closest thing to a chance the Black-and-Red created all night. Sean Johnson's saves and a Miguel Almirón miss from close range are the only reasons this finished 0-0 instead of as a loss.
Jon and Ted dig into why this keeps happening. João Peglow was suspended on yellow-card accumulation, leaving a midfield of Andre Dozzell, Ordaz, Kimito Nono and Brandon Servania that broke up play competently and created absolutely nothing going forward. Tai Baribo and Louis Munteanu score goals — they don't make them. Nobody on this roster makes them. That's not a bad night, that's the shape of the squad.
This was a must-win against a team below them, and everyone below D.C. gained ground. It's mid-September. Table watch officially begins.
René Weiler admitted the performance was poor, then returned — by the guys' count, roughly the fifth time — to comments about what the club spends. Jon has run out of patience with that line, given Weiler helped pick this squad. A question from Bluesky asks whether Weiler keeps his job if D.C. miss the playoffs. Both hosts say yes, and probably should: the last five D.C. head coaches have landed at roughly a 43% win rate regardless of who was in the chair. Weiler's contract runs through December 2027 and he's the highest-paid coach in club history. The real pressure arrives in the winter window, not in October.
Plus the Matti Peltola question. Benched against Atlanta, on in the second half, and the broadcast's man of the match against Columbus four days earlier. Ted's read: he doesn't fit Weiler's 4-3-3 and he's gone in January. Jon's objection: if he isn't a fit, you sell while the value is high — not after half a season rotting on the bench.
Roster movement: Conner Antley has been recalled from his loan at Tampa Bay after four starts, with no announced injury behind it. Caden Clark has been loaned out to Tacoma Defiance.
Then the story that put D.C. United on TechCrunch. The club is reported to be in talks to sell a stake in both the team and Audi Field to Collaborative Fund, the venture firm led by Craig Shapiro. MLS has not approved anything, and the league is still working out how large a private equity position it will even allow. Floated in the reporting: in-stadium placements for the firm's portfolio companies, and AI-managed fan entry times. Jon's skepticism is straightforward — an equity sale puts money in the current owner's pocket. It does not put a player on the field.
On the Spirit side: a loss to Boston Legacy FC at Audi Field, conceding twice in the final four minutes while pushing for an equalizer. Washington are still second overall. Jon's theory is a cohesion problem — a roster of stars and no club servants, which is a hard job for any coach when ownership signs everyone available. And there's a goalkeeper question waiting when Aubrey Kingsbury comes back.
Up top, Jon played inline hockey for the first time in 25 years, won, scored, then had his flight cancelled and Ubered home — turning 41 and picking hard sports on purpose. Ted refereed all weekend and is still proud of playing an advantage and then coming back for the yellow.
And the closing question: any buyer's remorse on the season tickets after a night like that? No. Now he can really yell at people.
30 min