Negative Income, Positive Trauma: (Anything Is Not Better Than Nothing)

People keep telling me, “Anything is better than nothing,” which is a cute idea until you open a calculator and realize that going back to work actually puts you in the red. That’s not something. That’s negative. That’s me paying money to have a job like it’s a reverse subscription service to burnout.

In this episode, I’m back in 2026 (late, obviously), talking about what it’s like to try to re enter the workforce after your nine year old dies and your entire personality gets put through a woodchipper. I spent nearly a decade as my son Kingston’s full time caregiver, then 18 months in grief free fall, and now I’m being told to “just go back to normal” like the last ten years were a weird gap year.

We get into:

• How caregiving, grief, and spiritual weirdness translate to exactly nothing on a résumé

• Why “just take anything” is financial gaslighting when childcare and lowball salaries equal negative income

• What boundaries actually are (hint: not you being a bitch) and why people react like you slapped their dad when you start using them

• Why the people closest to you fight your boundaries the hardest, and how to say no without writing a 12 page apology email

• How honoring your energy, your nervous system, and your connection to your dead child becomes non negotiable after your life detonates

This is not a soft, tea light grief podcast. There are no angel wing platitudes, no five step formulas, and definitely no “and then I magically healed” ending. Just one grieving mother telling the truth about trauma, identity, money, boundaries, and the deeply fucked math of trying to be “productive” when your nervous system is already doing advanced parkour.

If your current life motto is “Honestly, I’m fine” but what you really mean is “I’m not fine at all, but I’m still here,” this one is for you.

Links & Things I Mentioned:

Picture Book – Zuma’s Magical Balloon
A children’s book with a suspicious history of making grown men cry in airports and parked cars.
https://payhip.com/TheAfterWords

Grief & Signs Journal – You’re Not Crazy, You’re Connected
For anyone who keeps seeing signs, then immediately gaslighting themselves about it.
https://payhip.com/TheAfterWords

Start Here (Everything in One Place):
https://linktr.ee/Haute.Mess

Listen to the Podcast:
https://open.spotify.com/show/3KMvsMYt9F1e10sKhzehU2
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/honestly-im-fine/id1788589795
https://youtube.com/@honestlyimfine

Connect with Me (Maile Navarro):
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/honestly__im_fine
https://www.instagram.com/hautemess_la

TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@haute__mess