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One sigh from a VP in a meeting. That's all it takes for a team to stop bringing him problems for the rest of the year, no matter how many speeches about transparency he gave in January.

In part one of a two-part series on culture, Njsane Courtney uses Dead Poets Society to show why leaders create culture, even when they have no idea what it actually is. Welton Academy had four pillars on the wall: tradition, honor, discipline, excellence. The boys called the place "Helton." That gap between the framed values and the hallway reality is where your workplace lives too.

You'll hear:

• A working definition of culture: what people do when nobody who writes the reviews is watching
• The data on the values gap: 86% of workers say their company communicates its values clearly, but only 44% say they're consistently upheld
• A red flag/green flag game built on ordinary Tuesday moments
• The exact words that turn a VP's sigh into a culture-builder
• What Keating did with one classroom and no authority over the pillars, and what that means if you lead a team of six
• How to find out what your culture really is: look at who got promoted, who left, and who stopped talking
• Your homework: change one Tuesday behavior this week, then ask someone what they'd change and say nothing in your own defense

Part two flips the table and makes the case for how employees shape culture every day.

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LinkedIn: Njsane Courtney
Email: myfriendinhr@gmail.com

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You got promoted because you were great at your job. That job no longer exists. The skills that got you the corner office are now the ones most likely to cost you your credibility.

This is the sequel to Top 5 Tips for First-Time Managers. I walk you through five things that change when you step into a VP, director, or chief something officer role. I share new research from Spencer Stuart and Korn Ferry showing that even first-time CEOs are underprepared, underconnected, and overloaded. I also explain why Lieutenant Gorman from Aliens is a masterclass in what not to do on your first day in command. If you lead leaders, or plan to, this episode is about protecting your team, your culture, and your name.

In this episode:
• Moving from tasks to strategy, plus a monthly executive reality check
• How a joke, a "we'll see," or a public correction travels through the whole building
• The hallway compliment that becomes a broken promise, and three questions to ask before you say it
• Why loneliness is built into the job, and why you complain up, not down
• Building your bench from day one and treating your peers as your first team
• The Lieutenant Gorman Scale, plus challenges for new executives, managers, and future leaders

If this helped, follow or subscribe so the upcoming culture episodes land in your feed. Sign up for The Water Cooler, my monthly newsletter, at https://mfihr.com/newsletter.html. Then connect with me on LinkedIn at https://www.linkedin.com/in/njsanecourtney and tell me which executive lesson hit home.

Your job is meant to support your life. Your life is not meant to support your job.

Support the show

Visit: MFIHR.com

Instagram: myfriendin_hr
LinkedIn: Njsane Courtney
Email: myfriendinhr@gmail.com

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Leaders are keeping the perks and dropping the protection, and their people have noticed. In one 2026 survey, 80% of workers said they rarely or never trust leaders to put employees ahead of profit.

In this one I go back to the campfire with Simon Sinek's Leaders Eat Last to ask what leadership is for. For most of human history the deal was simple. The leader got the best spot by the fire, and when danger showed up, the leader stepped forward first. Today Gallup says 51% of U.S. employees are looking or watching for openings elsewhere, while layoffs and CEO pay both went up in 2025. I am tough on leaders here, because to whom much is given, much is expected. I am also fair to employees, because trust runs both ways. If you lead people, this is the foundation for the two culture episodes coming next. If you want the corner office, take the first punch.

In this episode:
• The campfire deal: perks in exchange for protection
• Takagi, Ellis, and Sergeant Powell as a Die Hard leadership case study
• Four ways leaders lose trust, including layoffs nobody explains and the silence that rumors fill
• What good looks like, with habits any leader can start this week
• The Ellis or Takagi game and a five question leadership trust check
• The employee side of trust, plus one challenge for leaders and one for employees

Follow or subscribe to My Friend in HR so the culture episodes land in your feed. Get the newsletter at https://mfihr.com/newsletter.html. And connect with me on LinkedIn at https://www.linkedin.com/in/njsanecourtney and tell me which leader you would have followed.

Your job is meant to support your life. Your life is not meant to support your job.

Support the show

Visit: MFIHR.com

Instagram: myfriendin_hr
LinkedIn: Njsane Courtney
Email: myfriendinhr@gmail.com