Most couples never learn how to talk about sex—and it quietly sabotages intimacy, desire, and connection in marriage. In this powerful Marriage IQ episode, Dr. Heidi Hastings and Dr. Scott Hastings sit down with OB/GYN nurse, educator, author, and podcast host Cindy Scharkey (Permission for Pleasure) to talk about female pleasure, sexual communication, desire discrepancy, anatomy education, painful sex, and how couples can cultivate a thriving “sexual garden” over time.

If you’ve ever wondered:
✔️ “Is something wrong with me?”
✔️ “Why don’t I want sex like I used to?”
✔️ “How do we talk about intimacy without shame?”
✔️ “Can I explore pleasure without abandoning my faith?”
…this episode is for you.

What you’ll learn in this conversation:
• Why a woman’s first sexual relationship is with herself
• The #1 reason so many women struggle to orgasm (and it’s NOT “brokenness”)
• How religion + purity culture can shape desire, shame, and arousal
• Why “low desire” is often a pleasure issue, not a libido issue
• Simple tools couples can use to improve intimacy—starting this week

🎧 Watch until the end for Cindy’s closing message on presence + mindfulness, and why being “checked out” mentally makes pleasure almost impossible.

Cindy’s Resources

📘 Get Cindy Scharkey’s book Permission for Pleasure

🌿 Blog Post : 4 Techniques Women Use To Increase Pleasure With Penetration
🎙️ Podcast Episode : Pleasure Techniques
🔗 Website: https://www.cindyscharkey.com/

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Looking for the best marriage advice to take your relationship from "fine" to high-performing? In this episode of Marriage IQ, we sit down with Dr. Robin Buckley to discuss transformative relationship strategies that bring the best of the boardroom into your home.

Do you run your business like a pro but your marriage like a Hallmark movie that’s running out of script? You aren’t alone. Many high-performers have incredible systems for work—KPIs, mission statements, and conflict management—but leave their most important relationship to "faith and trust."

Today, Dr. Robin Buckley, a PhD in clinical psychology and executive coach, explains why reframing love as a partnership worth managing is the smartest move you can make.

✨In this episode, we dive into:

~The Boardroom Blueprint: Why treating your marriage like a business is the smartest move you can make.

~The "No Other Zone": A 5-minute daily ritual that saves marriages.

~Automating Peace: How assigning chores (yes, like a business ops plan) eliminates resentment and builds trust.

~The SWOT Analysis for Couples: Navigating "threats" like the holidays and family stress before they happen.

~KPIs for Love: How to actually measure if your relationship is growing or just "existing."

#Stop settling for a "fine" marriage. It’s time to build a sustainable, high-performance partnership.

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Does your marriage feel hopeless right now? Before you make any permanent decisions, you need to know if you are fighting your spouse or if you are both fighting depression.

⚠️ This is Part 2 of our Deep Dive on Depression. In Part 1, Dr. Scott Hastings explained the medical side (brain chemistry, meds, and diagnosis).

Watch Part 1 Here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5PZyTeOqWd5E7YU1gTuQAh?si=ff2f5e06ec8342c5

In this episode of Marriage iQ, Dr. Heidi Hastings shifts the focus from the brain to the relationship. We break down the specific ways depression distorts your view of your partner, the "Three Lies" it tells you, and why your struggles feel permanent even when they aren't.

If you or your spouse are navigating this darkness, this video will give you the research-backed tools to separate the illness from the marriage and find a path back to connection.

Research & Links:
✨Seligman, M. E. P., & Garber, J. (1980). Human helplessness: Theory and applications.

✨Academic Press. Roepke, A.M. and Seligman, M.E., 2016.Depression and prospection.

✨British Journal of Clinical Psychology, 55(1), pp.23-48.

About Marriage IQ: We are Dr. Heidi Hastings (Marriage & Sex Researcher) and Dr. Scott Hastings (Medical Doctor). We combine medical expertise with relationship research to help you intelligently transform your marriage. Whether you need a tune-up or a total overhaul, we share the "secret sauce" of a scintillating relationship through real-life experience and science.

Link to the video Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman - Animation : https://youtu.be/2hHNq45rEnU

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