Episode Overview

This quick recap pulls the most actionable ideas from my conversation with Dr. Alison Fragale, author of Likeable Badass—so you can earn more respect (status), influence outcomes, and still feel like yourself doing it.

Be warm → get overlooked.

Be strong → get judged.

Show confidence → get questioned. …

So let’s fix the game instead of blaming you.

Summary

In this Quick Lift, we break down Alison’s core concept: people make fast judgments about you based on warmth and competence. When you intentionally signal both, you build status—and status becomes influence. The best part? The move is usually adding clarity and confidence, not subtracting kindness.

Key Takeaways

• Status is built (not granted): Warmth + Competence → Respect → Influence
• Power vs. status: A title can give power, but respect creates leverage
• “Too nice” isn’t a personality problem: it’s usually a signal problem (they’re not seeing enough competence/confidence)
• Self-promotion without backlash: Brag + Thank (claim impact + share credit)
• Tough conversations land better when you think in a relationship timeline: past + present + future signals

Quick Lift Moves (try these this week)

• Pick one signal to turn up:
  • Warmth: give public credit, a real check-in, a specific compliment
  • Competence: crisp POV, decisive language, bring the solution
• Use this sentence starter in meetings:
  • “My recommendation is ___, because ___.”
• Try Brag + Thank once (email, meeting, weekly update, LinkedIn):
  • “I’m proud of . Huge thanks to for __.”

Links & Resources

Alison's site: https://www.alisonfragale.com/

Alison's Instagram: @alisonfragale

Buy Likeable Badass: https://amzn.to/4628vSU

Loud & Lifted Podcast: https://www.loudandliftedpodcast.com/

Sign up for L&L newsletter: https://loud-lifted.kit.com/profile/links