There’s a version of partnership we imagine before kids and then there’s the one we’re living inside afterward. The one shaped by sleep deprivation, mental load, shifting identities, and the quiet pressure to keep everything together.

In this conversation, host Vanessa Spinarky and guest Eli Weinstein explore the emotional transition from “I do” to “we do” ... not as a romantic milestone, but as a relational and nervous system shift.

They talk about postpartum anxiety in partners, the way both people can feel unseen at the same time, and how communication changes when survival mode becomes the backdrop of daily life.

This episode holds space for couples who don’t feel broken, but do feel tired. For parents who still love each other, but don’t always know how to reach each other. It’s about staying in connection, even when capacity is low and the relationship feels more like a system than a sanctuary.

🔗 Stay Connected

Follow Vanessa on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/vanessa.spinarsky

Follow Eli on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/eliweinstein_lcsw

📘 Pre-Order Eli’s Book — From I Do to We Do

Canadian Amazon
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1394318693

U.S. Amazon
https://www.amazon.com/Partners-Parenting-Eli-Weinstein/dp/1394318693

Order via Eli’s Website
https://www.eliweinsteinlcsw.com/book

🎧 Listen to Eli’s Podcast

The Dude Therapist

Available on all major streaming platforms.

The world feels louder when everything is framed as a side to choose.

In this episode, Vanessa explores the emotional and relational impact of binary thinking: in culture, in parenting, in advocacy, and in how we judge one another. She reflects on the invisible pressure to be seen as “good,” “aware,” or “on the right side,” and how that pressure can quietly shape our nervous systems and our relationships.

Drawing from her own experience with perfectionism and moral identity, Vanessa looks at what happens when we assign intent to people we don’t actually know, and how quickly silence becomes a story instead of a question.

This episode isn’t about having better opinions. It’s about creating more room for complexity, for growth, and for the uncomfortable but human experience of not always knowing where you stand or why someone else stands where they do.

Motherhood isn’t meant to be done alone or performed for approval.

In this episode, Vanessa Spinarsky, Carrie Parker, and Alyssa Trittler pull back the curtain on the Mama Healing Hub - a therapist-led space designed for mothers who are tired of performing, fixing, and holding it all together.

They talk about how their drop-in sessions are built around real-life motherhood . From art therapy you can join in your pajamas, to coffee talks that feel more like sitting at a kitchen table than being in a “program,” the Hub is designed to meet moms where they actually are.

The hosts share how they choose guest speakers, why relatability matters more than credentials, and how community, not content, is the real medicine.

This conversation is an invitation into a space where mothers don’t have to show up polished, productive, or put-together...just present.

If you want a place to actually land the Mama Healing Hub is our therapist-led community for mothers who want support without pressure, performance, or perfection.

Inside the Hub, you’ll find:

• Live drop-ins you can join from anywhere

• Art therapy sessions, coffee talks, and guest speakers who feel human—not polished

• A space where you can show up exactly as you are

Join us here:
👉 https://www.themamahealinghub.com/plans/1441545?bundle_token=9c02f21e29a58c520f010f3930cba2bd&utm_source=manual

Use code PODCAST for 25% off your membership.