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Hypothetically Speaking

Hypothetically Speaking

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Our planned show fell through, so Dave pivoted to hypotheticals with Esha Patel, Nikki Chang, Moesha, and a rotating cast of M1s (flexibility is a medical skill, allegedly): what changes if everyone wakes up six inches taller (more presence, fewer step stools, capris, heels, five extra minutes of sleep), who do you want when a flight attendant asks for a doctor (a 70-year-old psychiatrist, a dentist, or a veterinarian), and would you rewind to age ten or ten years with everything you know now? Also, which one sense would you let everyone perceive as terrible (sound, apparently, which led to a pretty good Dance Mom impression), what happens when your car becomes a human roommate for four years, and would you take $100,000 to have skin a color outside human variation (hot pink, traffic cone orange, glow-in-the-dark)? Also, $10 million to give up one ordinary human ability: embarrassment goes first, overthinking is a closer call. Also, Dave’s mother made him take down his political attack-ad parody.

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