Today’s episode explores the downward spiral Figs went through after a conversation with a friend who confidently declared that only two things end a marriage: babies and threesomes.

Figs has thoughts...

In this episode, she challenges that claim by asking the uncomfortable (and fun) questions: Are threesome fantasies actually that common? Is this really a male-centric fantasy? Is it an even split where one person pushes to have a threesome and the other partner complies? Who’s even having threesomes? How do they impact relationships in real life? And finally, is it possible for a threesome to benefit a relationship rather than destroy it?

Citations and Stuff I read:

Armstrong, H. L., & Reissing, E. D. (2014). Attitudes toward casual sex, dating, and committed relationships with bisexual partners. Journal of bisexuality, 14(2), 236-264.

Johnston, S. W. (2025). “My First Threesome with Them Was a Religious Experience”: A Mixed-Methods Study of Symbiosexual Experiences. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 1-18.

Jonason, P. K., & Marks, M. J. (2009). Common vs. uncommon sexual acts: Evidence for the sexual double standard. Sex Roles, 60(5), 357-365.

Joyal, C. C., Cossette, A., & Lapierre, V. (2015). What exactly is an unusual sexual fantasy?. The journal of sexual medicine, 12(2), 328-340.

Kulibert, D., Moran, J. B., Preman, S., Vannier, S. A., & Thompson, A. E. (2021). Sex on the Screen: A Content Analysis of Free Internet Pornography Depicting Mixed-Sex Threesomes from 2012–2020. European Journal of Investigation in Health, Psychology and Education, 11(4), 1555-1570. https://doi.org/10.3390/ejihpe11040110

Morris, H., Chang, I. J., & Knox, D. (2016). Three’sa crowd or bonus?: College students’ threesome experiences. Journal of Positive Sexuality, 2(November), 62-76

Pandey, M. K., Thakral, H., Mishra, P., & Rao, T. S. (2025). Decoding Threesomes: Insights into Motivations, Gender Dynamics, and Societal Impact. Journal of Psychosexual Health, 26318318241299028.

Pornhub (2025, March 18). 2024 year in Review. Pornhub Insights. https://www.pornhub.com/insights/2024-year-in-review#categories

Scoats, R., Joseph, L. J., & Anderson, E. (2018). ‘I don’t mind watching him cum’: Heterosexual men, threesomes, and the erosion of the one-time rule of homosexuality. Sexualities, 21(1-2), 30-48.

Scoats, R. (2019). ‘If there is no homo, there is no trio’: Women’s experiences and expectations of MMF threesomes. Psychology & Sexuality, 10(1), 45-55.

Scoats, R., Anderson, E., & White, A. J. (2021). Exploring gay men's threesomes: Normalization, Concerns, and sexual opportunities. Journal of Bodies, Sexualities, and Masculinities, 2(2), 82-106.

Scoats, R., & Anderson, E. (2019). ‘My partner was just all over her’: jealousy, communication and rules in mixed-sex threesomes. Culture, Health & Sexuality, 21(2), 134-146.

Scoats, R. (2019). Understanding Threesomes: Gender, Sex, and Consensual Non-Monogamy (1st ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9780429453328

Valovirta, E. (2021). Repeated Pleasure: Reading the Threesome Ménage Romance as Digital Literature. Powerful Prose, 45.

Art: bofenglin

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