hello collective and welcome back to another episode of how sebbie c’s it.

today’s episode is a heavy one, but it’s also one that’s been sitting on my heart for a long time. i wanted to talk openly about what it means to grow up as a jehovah’s witness… and what it feels like to leave a world that shaped you, hurt you, and still holds so many people you love.

i’ve been thinking a lot lately about grief, the kind that comes after survival.

because when you finally make it out of something toxic… when you finally build a life that feels free and real… there’s this strange, bittersweet weight that follows you. it’s like you’re living the dream your younger self prayed for, but you can’t stop thinking about the people who are still back there. still stuck. still afraid.

and i’ve been carrying a lot of survivor’s guilt.

i talk about what it does to your nervous system to be raised in a high-control religion. how you grow up too fast, how you’re taught fear instead of unconditional love, how it seeps into your relationships, your choices, your sense of self.

but i also talk about hope.

because i truly believe that freedom is possible. healing is possible. and love (real love) exists outside of the systems that tried to shrink us.

if you’ve ever felt like you had to start over, or if you’ve ever left something that broke you, i hope this episode makes you feel less alone.

thank you for being here. thank you for listening. and thank you for letting me tell the truth.

that’s how sebbie c sees it.

follow me on tiktok & instagram: @sebastiancail

this week on how sebbie c’s it, i’m sitting down with one of my favorite people and collaborators — jasper bickers. singer, songwriter, producer, internet lore king, and genuinely one of the greatest creatives i know.

we talk about what it actually means to build a creative life in la — the good, the weird, the parasocial, the deeply human parts of it. from session culture and social media to writing songs that are emotionally true (even if they’re not literally factual), this conversation is about trusting your voice and letting your work evolve with you.

we get into queer art and religion, vulnerability in songwriting, finding your people, and why making people feel safe in creative spaces matters more than chasing virality. jasper opens up about his journey as a producer and artist, his song “missionary,” and how independence can be both terrifying and powerful.

we also talk about:

• building creative community (online and irl)

• why authenticity always wins in the long run

• being seen on the internet and still staying human

• posting, pivoting, experimenting, and letting yourself change

• inner child energy, healing eras, and bringing magic back

this episode feels like a love letter to the process — not the finish line. ( wink wink )

if you’re an artist, a creative, or just someone trying to build something meaningful without losing yourself, this one’s for you.

connect with us:

@sebastiancail
@jasperbickers

for contacts & inquiries:
jasperbickers.com

this week on how sebbie c’s it, i’m joined by my dear friend camilla gratton - singer, songwriter, and emotional truth-teller, for a raw, funny, and deeply honest conversation about addiction, creativity, and being human in your 20s.

we talk about camilla’s brand new single 'nicotine daze' (which is officially out now), a song that explores addiction in all its forms — not just substances, but patterns, people, dopamine, and the things we crave even when we know they aren’t good for us

together, we unpack:

• ​how addiction sneaks in when something goes from “fun” to “oh shit”
• ​why art gets better when you stop being vague and start being specific
• ​the pressure of releasing music people already want
• ​love addiction, emotional dependency, and craving connection
• ​why nonchalant energy is officially cancelled
• ​being seen, being vulnerable, and regulating your nervous system online
• ​finding real queer friends and building aligned community

this episode is equal parts heart-to-heart, creative therapy session, and chaotic bestie banter — and if you’ve ever loved something that loved you back a little too hard, this one’s for you.

🎧 listen to “nicotine daze” by camilla gratton — out now on all streaming platforms.

🗣️follow us: @sebastiancail @camillagratton

💭 if this episode hit you in the chest, screenshot it, share it, and tag us — we see you, we feel you, and you’re not alone.