When the young couple, Sage and Diego, walk into their Airbnb or Verbo or whatever, I dont really know, they can’t believe how beautiful it is. For the low, low price of I dont know, a million dollars, they get to stay in this amazing lakefront mansion for the weekend. But trouble is afoot. A second couple, Will and Cin, arrive, claiming they have also booked the property for the weekend. Instead of leaving and demanding a refund from the host as any normal person would, they decided to share the large house for the next few days. But things become more turbulent as Will and Cin show their wild side, and are increasingly inappropriate with Sage and Diego. Your social anxiety might try to tell you that they are just quirky and weird, but there may be more beneath the surface.

When Bone Lake came out in theaters, I was excited to watch it, but due to conflicting schedules and its limited release, we were unable to review it at that point. This was disappointing because I had heard it was really scary (mainly from my wife, who saw the trailer and said it creeped her out, which is usually a good sign for me). So when I saw it was streaming on netflix I immediately texted Bryce and told him we were reviewing it this week. Oh, how I wish I could turn back time. This movie is pretty boring and has been done before (and better). The whole time I kept thinking “they already did this with Speak no Evil, a movie which did so well that it was immediately remade with an American cast”. Bone lake does the same thing with a worse script and less tension. Thats not to say anything about Bone Lake is particularly bad. It’s fine. But the main stressor throughout the film is “Will these characters sleep with each other,” and that’s just kind of lame (unless you are super horned up). But even then its kind of a letdown. We’ve all had that one friend who makes the social situation a little more sexual than it needs to be, and while that is uncomfortable, it’s not scary. I’ll give it points for having some sort of funny, dark comedy kills in the beginning. But mostly I was waiting for it to be over.

Score 4/10

The Bone Temple, in addition to what I call my bedroom is the latest installment in the 28 days later franchise. It picks up almost directly after 28 Years Later leaves off. Spike (Alfie Williams) is forced to prove himself to join the Jimmies, a sadistic cult fashioned after the media personality Jimmy Savile, led by the leader Jimmy Crystal. Meanwhile, Dr. Kelson (Ralph Fiennes) furthers his research into the rage virus and befriends Samson, the Alpha.

I found 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple enjoyable, but not particularly meaty compared to it’s predecessor. The humanity and reverence for death found in the last film are spare in this film, which mostly focuses on the chaos brought on by the jimmies, and Dr Kelson’s descent into hopelessness.

The Script by Alex Garland, is high quality, but unfortunately just feels like a retread of similar story lines in The Walking Dead.

Nia DaCosta’s Direction is respectful towards Danny Boyle’s style established in the previous films in the series, while showing her own style with stylistic flair.

The standouts in the film are Jack O’connel, who played Sir Jimmy Crystal, and of course Ralph Fienes as Dr Kelson.

O’Connell balances the two sides of portraying a cult leader well. Maintaining a believable facade of delusion and inspiration, while also showing the con-man manipulator that lurks behind the curtains. O’connell takes the great dialogue and makes it come alive through his performance, and is as enjoyable to watch in this as he was in Sinners.

Ralph Fienes gets to play around a little more in this film. Instead of the stolid and enigmatic character from the last film, we get to see his humanity, practicality, and loneliness filled out and explored in this film. The best part of the film features him getting to display his own theatrics to the Jimmies, which left me laughing out loud.

If you didn’t like 28 Years Later because of the lack of zombies, you will be disappointed here as well, they play almost no part in this film with the exception of the tranquilized Samson.

Overall it was highly enjoyable, although slightly less so than the last film

8/10

Primate is about a college student named Lucy who comes home to her family house in Hawiia, along with a few of her friends. But this is no ordinary house, for it is home to humans and apes alike. Lucy’s father owns a pet/member of the family named Ben who is a fully grown chimpanzee. Im sure without explaining anymore you can already tell where this is going. When her father leaves for an important book signing, Lucy and her friends are left alone as Ben starts to act weirder and weirder, showing signs of rabies. By the time her father comes home, their fate may already be sealed.

The set up for Primate is very basic and has been done time and time again using various animals. If you’ll recall movies like the Shallows, or Crawl, then you know all about Primate. But what separates this movie from the others is the many different ways chimpanzees can kill you. With a shark, you basically got one move. They bite. Chimps on the other hand bite, beat, rip and tear, and you can be sure to see all of that here. And it is every bit as horrifying as you can imagine. Within the first 5 minutes of the movie I was fully bought in, and honestly felt extremely tense throughout the entire film. Chimps are terrifying, but they also fit in this weird slot of uncanny valley where they can also be extremely cute and hilarious. I don’t think seeing a chimpanzee on screen with ever cease to amaze me, and I am totally here for it if they want to make a Primate 2 and 3. This movie had me genuinely scared. That being said, it is also super predictable. Its a paint by numbers movie where the main color is blood red. Which is fun, but not super thought provoking.

Score 7/10