You finally brought up the mental load. You found the words. You mustered the courage. And then… nothing. Maybe they shut down. Maybe they pushed back. Maybe the conversation just fell flat.

In this powerful follow-up to our original Mental Load episode, we unpack what happens when that invisible labour finally gets named, but the conversation doesn’t land.

Whether you're met with defensiveness, silence, or a flat-out dismissal, this episode walks you through what to do when your partner isn’t ready to engage.

We cover:

• What mental load really is (and how it differs from task load)

• Why your partner might resist or shut down the conversation

• How to zoom out and see the bigger system at play

• Practical tools to move forward—even if you're carrying it alone for now

This isn’t about blame. It’s about building bridges, one small shift at a time. If you’ve ever said “I’ve tried to talk about it… but nothing changes,” this one’s for you.

➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy! ⁠⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Watch on YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠⁠

mental load, invisible labour, emotional load, relationship communication, partner shut down, defensiveness, resentment in marriage, repair tools, unspoken contracts, scorekeeping

What’s the feeling you can’t even name, let alone share?

In this episode of Honey, We Need to Chat, we’re diving deep into the emotional undercurrents that silently shape our reactions, create disconnection, and quietly erode intimacy.

We explore the concept of unbearable feelings, those overwhelming emotions like shame, hyper-responsibility, fear of being too much or not enough, and how they manifest in relationships through bottling, numbing, stonewalling, over-functioning, and explosive reactions.

We get raw about their own patterns, childhood roots, and the real-life impact these invisible feelings have on communication, parenting, and connection.

With practical questions, examples, and a free downloadable resource to help you identify your own hidden emotional drivers, this is an episode you’ll want to reflect on, revisit, and share with your partner.

🎧 Whether you’re curious about emotional intimacy, want to communicate better, or just feel stuck in unhealthy patterns, this conversation will give you tools and language to move forward- together.

➡️ ⁠⁠⁠Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy! ⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠⁠⁠⁠Watch on YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠⁠⁠⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠⁠

unbearable feelings in relationships, emotional intimacy, communication in marriage, relationship triggers, resentment and burnout, relationship podcast, parenting and emotional regulation, how to communicate better, emotional safety, fear of being too much, hyper-responsibility, couples podcast

Ever feel like you're speaking two different languages in your marriage? Or wonder why your partner shuts down when you bring something up?

We sat down with Sam and Liv Ramsden (aka Mr. & Mrs. Silly Stories for Kids) to explore what really goes on under the surface when we miss each other in conflict. This one’s packed with honest conversation, real-life tools, and the kind of grace that keeps a marriage grounded.

We talk about:

• Why emotional wiring matters in conflict

• How to study your partner instead of fixing them

• Staying on the same team (even when you clash)

• Parenting, overstimulation, and emotional repair

• What really holds a marriage together behind the chaos of raising kids and building a podcast

If you’re in a season of disconnect or just want to grow your communication muscle, this episode will meet you where you’re at.

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You can connect with Sam & Silly Stories for Kids:

• Anywhere you get your podcasts
• Youtube - www.youtube.com/@SillyStoriesforKidspodcast
• www.sillystoriesforkids.com
• Instagram - @sillystoriesforkids

____________________________

➡️ ⁠⁠Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy! ⁠⁠

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠⁠⁠Watch on YouTube⁠⁠⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠⁠⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠⁠

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In this revealing episode, we dive into the powerful concept of unspoken contracts - the invisible rules and assumptions quietly shaping your relationship. From mental load to emotional shutdown, financial habits to intimacy dynamics, we’ll help you uncover the hidden systems that might be leaving you feeling stuck, resentful, or disconnected.

Through relatable real-life examples, Amy and Blair show you how to identify these silent agreements, why they form, and how to transform them into intentional, balanced partnerships.

🎧 Listen for practical tools to:

• Recognise default patterns that may be sabotaging connection.

• Understand unmet needs and how they create resentment.

• Shift from blame and frustration to curiosity and teamwork.

• Rebuild communication and intimacy by bringing these hidden contracts into the open.

Whether you’re feeling distant in your marriage, struggling with mental load, or just wanting to communicate better, this episode will empower you to take back clarity, balance, and connection.

******

➡️ ⁠Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy! ⁠

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠⁠Watch on YouTube⁠⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠

____________________

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Welcome to Honey, We Need to Chat, where we dig deep into the real struggles couples face, from silent resentment to those tricky conversations that can make or break a relationship.

In this episode, we uncover the hidden habit of scorekeeping in relationships, what it is, why it happens, and how to stop it. Whether you’re feeling unseen, unheard, or just overwhelmed, we’ll share practical tools to break the pattern of resentment, rebuild trust, and create healthier communication.

🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠Watch on YouTube⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠

⁠Come and watch Amy in Come From Away

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Ever wonder why you react the way you do in conflict, or why certain habits feel impossible to break?

In this episode, Blair gets coached live by Amy using the “Six Core Human Needs” framework to explore what truly drives our behaviour in relationships. From control issues to chasing dopamine hits, we unpack how unmet needs shape our communication, emotions, and connection.

Whether you’re craving more balance, peace, or clarity in your relationship, this episode offers real-time insight, vulnerability, and practical tools to shift stuck patterns. Tune in and discover what’s driving you.

➡️ Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy!

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

📺 ⁠Watch on YouTube⁠

📥 Get free tools + coaching support: ⁠honeyweneedtochat.com⁠

⁠🎭 Come and watch Amy in Come From Away

relationship podcast, marriage podcast, communication tools, personal growth, six core needs, Tony Robbins needs, marriage help, couples therapy, emotional intelligence, relationship advice, live coaching, married life struggles, podcast for couples, understanding each other

Why do the smallest things trigger the biggest arguments? In this episode, we unpack the sneaky, subtle unmet needs that quietly shape our relationship dynamics, often without us realising it. From rejected dinners to phone use tensions and dead bedrooms, we explore real Reddit stories that show how core emotional needs go unspoken and how that misfires into conflict.

You'll learn:

• What unmet needs really are (and why they’re so sneaky)

• Common signs you’re missing each other emotionally

• Why assumptions and silence create deeper disconnect

• Practical tools to communicate needs without drama

• How to spot patterns and build healthier habits together

💬 Whether you’re feeling disconnected or want to avoid drifting apart, this episode gives you relatable insight and practical tools to tackle the root - not just the symptoms - of tension.

🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts.
📺 Watch on YouTube
📥 Get free tools + coaching support: honeyweneedtochat.com

Come and watch Amy in Come From Away

unmet needs in relationships, communication in relationships, marriage podcast, relationship advice, emotional disconnection, intimacy problems, dead bedroom, how to fix your marriage, relationship burnout, couples therapy, real reddit stories, relationship coaching, how to communicate better, podcast for couples, emotional needs in marriage, relationship growth, healthy relationship tips, Honey We Need to Chat, Christian relationship podcast, how to talk to your partner

Feel like you and your partner keep missing each other emotionally? Do you shut down when things get tense or over-explain to get back on the same page? In this episode of Honey, We Need to Chat, we unpack how attachment styles shape the way couples communicate, fight, and try to reconnect.

We break down the three main attachment styles (secure, anxious, and avoidant) where they come from, and how they play out in everyday moments (like text message tone, stonewalling, or needing constant reassurance). Plus, we share our own journey of shifting out of old patterns and building a more secure connection over time.

Whether you're married, dating, or just reflecting on your emotional habits, this conversation will help you put language to your patterns and start healing the cycle.

🧠 Topics covered:

• What attachment styles actually are (and where they come from)

• Signs of anxious vs. avoidant vs. secure behaviour

• Real-life examples of these dynamics in marriage

• How to begin healing patterns and move toward secure connection

• A practical “Reality Check Corner” with reflective prompts

🎧 Important links:

Want more on Attachment Styles? Download your free worksheet and conversation starter kit on attachment styles at honeyweneedtochat.com/free-relationship-resources

Come see Amy in Come From Away! ➡️ alburyentertainmentcentre.com.au/whatson/come-from-away

Book a Free Clarity Session with Amy ➡️ nextchaptercoaching.com.au/free-clarity-session

🔗Listen now: Anywhere you find your podcasts!

📺Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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