Couverture de Consider the Source: Holiday Peace Without People-Pleasing

Consider the Source: Holiday Peace Without People-Pleasing

Consider the Source: Holiday Peace Without People-Pleasing

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What you’ll hear

Holiday opinions can get loud—Stay later. Bring more. Why aren’t you married yet?
Today, we reclaim your peace with a simple filter—consider the source—and give you clear, kind sentences to use at real gatherings (plus a 60-second bathroom reset you can do anywhere).


Save these lines (copy/paste)

Staying late

  • “I’m heading out at 8:30 so I can be fully present tomorrow.”
    → Pivot: “Who wants tea before I go?”

Extra tasks (“load creep”)

  • “I can’t add mains, but I’ll bring dessert and tea.”


  • “Two things I can do are A and B.”


Money & gifts

  • “We’re keeping it simple—experiences over stuff this year.”


  • “Our budget’s set; let’s plan a game night in January.”


Food/body comments

  • “I’m listening to my body—this is perfect for me.”
    → Pivot: “Did you try the salad? It’s amazing.”


Screens & photos

  • “I’m off my phone tonight. Send me your favorite photos later?”
    → “Let’s grab one quick picture by the tree.”


“Why aren’t you married yet?”

  • Warm: “I’m building a life that fits me, on my timeline. I’m happy.”


  • Values: “Commitment for me is about alignment and timing.”


  • Playful: “Currently partnered with my peace. How are you this year?”


  • Firm: “I don’t discuss my relationship status at gatherings.”
    → Pivot for all: “What was your favorite moment this year?”



The Boundary Ladder (choose your rung)

  1. Redirect: “I can’t stay late—how about I help with dishes now?”


  2. Limit: “I’m in for an hour.”


  3. Trade: “I can’t make sides, but I’ll pick up dessert.”


  4. Delay: “Not this week—circle back in January?”


  5. Decline: “That’s a no for me.”


  6. Exit: “I’m heading out—love you. Text me when you’re home.”



60-second reset (bathroom/balcony/hallway)

Feet flat. One hand on heart, one on belly.
Box breathe: in 4, hold 4, out 4, hold 4 (×3).
Name one thing you see, one you hear, one you feel.
Whisper: “I lead with my values.”
Re-enter with a task: “I’m refreshing waters—who needs one?”


2-minute Holiday Peace Plan

  • Value + non-negotiable: “This week I lead with [value]; I will [specific thing].”


  • Draft two scripts: one for time, one for workload.


  • Pick one reset: the 60-second sequence above.


  • Text one ally: “If I say I’m leaving at 8:30, cheer me on.”



Workshop

I’m hosting a capped Values-First Planning Workshop in early January so I can coach you live. Waitlist gets first dibs and a bonus Winter Word → 90-Day Map worksheet.

Email hello@daryamaeki.com with subject WORKSHOP WAITLIST.

If a moment lands beautifully this week because you used one line from today, I want to hear it. Merry Christmas, friend.

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