Épisodes

  • #760: The $300 Ad Strategy That Consistently Produces 2-3 Deals Every Month with Jay Kinder

    #760: The $300 Ad Strategy That Consistently Produces 2-3 Deals Every Month with Jay Kinder
    Jan 27 2026
    Episode Overview

    In this episode of the John Kitchens Coach Podcast, John Kitchens sits down with Jay Kinder to break down the $300 ad strategy that consistently produces 2–3 real estate deals every single month—without chasing referrals, overpaying portals, or riding the income rollercoaster.

    This isn't a hype-filled conversation about "running ads." It's a behind-the-scenes look at how predictable deal flow actually works when you understand conversations, constraints, and customer acquisition cost.

    John and Jay walk through why most agents fail with ads, how a small, disciplined budget can outperform massive spend, and why the real goal isn't leads—it's controlled, repeatable conversations. If you're tired of inconsistent closings, referral fees eating your margins, or guessing where your next deal is coming from, this episode gives you a simple framework to take control.

    Key Topics Covered The $300 Ad Strategy Explained

    • Why small, consistent ad spend beats large, inconsistent budgets

    • How $300/month can outperform thousands in referral fees

    • The real objective of ads: conversations, not clicks or leads

    • Why predictability matters more than scale early on

    Why Most Agents Fail With Ads

    • The mistake agents make after 7–10 days of "no results"

    • Why agents blame platforms instead of fixing the constraint

    • The danger of not understanding message-to-market match

    • Why most agents quit before ads have time to compound

    Conversations Per Day = Deals Per Month

    • Why conversations are the only KPI that matters

    • How many conversations it actually takes to close 2–3 deals

    • Increasing conversations per hour through automation and AI

    • Why lead count is a vanity metric

    Customer Acquisition Cost (The Math Nobody Teaches)

    • Breaking down referral fees vs. paid ads

    • Why paying $3–5K per deal kills long-term growth

    • Understanding real cost per closing

    • Why controlling CAC gives you leverage and freedom

    The Theory of Constraints Applied to Lead Gen

    • Identifying your biggest bottleneck ("Herbie")

    • Why fixing the wrong problem keeps you stuck

    • How to build throughput instead of chaos

    • Why lead gen, conversion, and fulfillment must stay balanced

    Why Consistency Beats Hustle

    • How inconsistent closings destroy cash flow

    • Why fulfillment kills lead gen without systems

    • Designing a business that runs even when you're busy

    • The shift from "agent" to CEO thinking

    Resources & Mentions

    • The Goal by Eliyahu Goldratt – Theory of Constraints

    • Dan Kennedy – Direct response marketing fundamentals

    • Gary Halbert – Message-to-market match

    • Alex Hormozi – Constraint-based growth principles

    • CoachKitchens.ai – AI-powered real estate business assistant

    • John Kitchens Executive Coaching → JohnKitchens.coach

    Final Takeaway

    If you can't predict your next 2–3 deals, your business isn't a business—it's a gamble.

    This episode proves you don't need massive budgets, portals, or referral fees to win. You need clarity, discipline, and control over your conversations.

    Stop guessing.
    Stop overpaying.
    Build a simple system that works every month.

    "The goal isn't more leads—it's predictable conversations that turn into predictable closings." – John Kitchens

    ess to answer it honestly—determines your next level.

    Connect with Us:
    • Instagram: @johnkitchenscoach
    • LinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoach
    • Facebook: @johnkitchenscoach

    If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    52 min
  • #759: How to Build Scalable Systems That Let Real Estate Agents Escape Production with Joel Perso

    #759: How to Build Scalable Systems That Let Real Estate Agents Escape Production with Joel Perso
    Jan 23 2026
    Episode Overview

    In the second part of this Power Hour series, John Kitchens together with operations expert Joel Perso to tackle one of the biggest bottlenecks holding agents and team leaders back: operational chaos.

    This session is a practical, back-to-basics masterclass on how to actually build business processes that scale, not just talk about systems. John and Joel break down the difference between systems, processes, SOPs, and checklists—and explain why most agents stay trapped in production because their business only exists in their head.

    If you've ever said "I need better systems" but felt overwhelmed on where to start, this episode gives you a clear, executable framework to begin documenting, delegating, and scaling—without overcomplicating it.

    Key Topics Covered Why Processes Are the Foundation of Freedom

    • The difference between being self-employed and owning a real business

    • Why you can't escape a business that only lives in your head

    • How documented processes create leverage, consistency, and delegation

    Systems vs. Processes (And Why Most People Confuse Them)

    • What a "system" actually is versus a "process"

    • How multiple processes work together to support one system

    • Real-world examples using marketing, listings, and lead conversion

    Where to Start Building Processes (Without Overwhelm)

    • Identifying your core business processes by function

    • Why lead generation and marketing should come first

    • How to prioritize processes that create the biggest ROI

    The Power of Simplicity

    • Why Google Docs and checklists beat complex flowcharts

    • How checklists outperform experience alone

    • The 80/20 rule of process design (and why perfection kills momentum)

    Making Processes Actually Get Used

    • Why SOPs die on the shelf

    • Connecting processes to daily, weekly, and monthly execution

    • How activity checklists turn documentation into action

    Using AI to Accelerate Documentation

    • Recording what you already do instead of starting from scratch

    • How tools like Loom, Scribe, and AI can create SOPs faster

    • Turning videos into checklists, SOPs, and training assets

    Leadership, Accountability, and Ownership

    • Why processes should be owned by roles, not people

    • How process ownership improves accountability and scalability

    • Creating a culture of problem-solving instead of rigidity

    Resources & Mentions

    • The Checklist Manifesto – Atul Gawande

    • Traction / Rocket Fuel (EOS Framework) – Gino Wickman

    • The Goal – Eliyahu Goldratt

    • Trainual – Process documentation & training platform

    • Scribe – AI-powered SOP creation

    • Honey Badger Nation

    • John Kitchens Executive Coaching → JohnKitchens.coach

    Final Takeaway

    You don't scale by working harder—you scale by removing guesswork.

    Processes aren't about control or bureaucracy. They're about clarity, consistency, and creating freedom for you and your team. Start simple. Document what already works. Build checklists before complexity. And remember: a good process that handles 80% of situations beats a perfect one that never gets used.

    "You can never escape a business that only lives in your head." – Joel Perso

    Connect with Us:
    • Instagram: @johnkitchenscoach
    • LinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoach
    • Facebook: @johnkitchenscoach

    If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    40 min
  • #758: How to Thrive in Uncertain Markets with Jeff Thibodeau

    #758: How to Thrive in Uncertain Markets with Jeff Thibodeau
    Jan 20 2026
    Episode Overview In this episode, John Kitchens sat down with Jeff Thibodeau, a real estate veteran with nearly two decades of experience who has seen the industry from every seat—agent, team leader, brokerage owner, investor, and mentor. Jeff shares his full-circle journey through real estate: from entering the business during the financial crash, to building high-performing teams and a brokerage, to stepping away—and ultimately returning with a renewed focus on simplicity, freedom, and intentional design. Together, John and Jeff unpack what it really takes to thrive in uncertain markets, why top producers continue to gain market share, and how agents must evolve from being information gatekeepers to trusted advisors who sell certainty in an increasingly complex world. This conversation is a masterclass in mindset, leadership, client communication, and designing a real estate business that supports your life—not consumes it. Key Topics Covered Jeff's Full-Circle Real Estate Journey Entering real estate during the financial crash and surviving early uncertainty Leveraging online marketing and lead generation before it was mainstream Building teams, operational systems, and eventually a brokerage Selling the brokerage and rediscovering a simpler, more intentional business model Growth vs. Fulfillment The pressure of "always scaling" and chasing the next level How growth environments can both accelerate success and lead to burnout Recognizing when a season of life calls for simplicity instead of expansion Why production isn't a "low-level task" if it aligns with your strengths Market Cycles & Mindset Why your brain goes to "zero" in challenging markets—and how to fight that instinct Understanding that markets never stop producing opportunities Why top agents gain market share when others retreat The reality that today's market requires more effort, not less Lead Generation & Client Qualification Why everything starts at the front of the funnel Generating more conversations to avoid desperation decisions The danger of taking B, C, and D clients in a tough market How scarcity thinking destroys profitability The Skill That Matters Most Right Now Why having uncomfortable conversations is the #1 skill in today's market Disagreeing with clients without losing trust—or the relationship Leading clients through reality instead of avoiding conflict Framing conversations to maintain authority and professionalism Leadership & Certainty as the New Value Proposition Why consumers feel more informed than ever Moving from a knowledge-based role to a wisdom-based role Selling certainty in a market filled with fear and complexity Why clients pay for confidence, clarity, and leadership—not access to data AI, Smarter Consumers & the Future of Agent Value Why information is no longer the differentiator How AI empowers consumers—and agents who adapt Reframing your value as guidance, judgment, and execution Becoming the calm, trusted professional clients rely on Resources & Mentions Jeff Thibodeau YouTube Channel – Real-world strategies and market insights John Kitchens Executive Coaching → JohnKitchens.coach The 8 Stages of the Real Estate Business → The8Stages.com Crucial Conversations – Recommended for improving difficult client conversations Final Takeaway The agents who win in today's market aren't louder, cheaper, or flashier—they're calmer, clearer, and more decisive. As Jeff explains, real estate professionals no longer win by controlling information. They win by delivering certainty, leading difficult conversations, and guiding clients through complexity with confidence. When uncertainty rises, leadership becomes the product. "People don't hire agents for information anymore. They hire them to feel certain they'll reach the finish line." – Jeff Thibodeau Connect with Us: Instagram: @johnkitchenscoachLinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoachFacebook: @johnkitchenscoach If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    49 min
  • #757: How CEOs Create Operational Leverage with Joel Perso

    #757: How CEOs Create Operational Leverage with Joel Perso
    Jan 15 2026
    Episode Overview In this Power Hour episode, John Kitchens is joined by Joel Perso for a deep dive into one of the most overlooked growth constraints in real estate businesses: operational chaos. As agents and teams ramp up lead flow, listings, and transactions, most don't realize they're unintentionally building a treadmill instead of a scalable business. John and Joel kick off a multi-week Power Hour series focused on helping agents and team leaders move from production overload to operational clarity—without losing momentum. This episode zeroes in on the single most common operational question agents ask once growth kicks in: Who should I hire first—and why? From admins to operations managers, integrators, and COOs, John and Joel break down each role, when you actually need it, and the costly mistakes teams make when they hire out of order. If your business feels busy but fragile, this conversation will help you close the "back door," protect your pipeline, and start building a business that lasts. Key Topics Covered Conquering Operational Chaos Why growth without operations creates burnout, bottlenecks, and missed opportunities The difference between building a business vs. building a treadmill How operational clarity protects momentum as deal flow increases The Right Hire, in the Right Order Why most teams hire too much responsibility into one role The difference between an admin, operations manager, integrator, and COO How to identify what stage your business is actually in The Admin Role (Where Most Teams Should Start) What an admin should and should not be responsible for Why admins follow processes—not create them Common mistakes that cause admin hires to fail Virtual vs. in-office admin considerations Operations Managers & Scaling Support When an admin is ready to grow into an operations manager role How operations managers turn chaos into order Why this role helps leaders finally "breathe again" Head of Operations vs. Integrator vs. COO Why titles matter—and how they can backfire if misused The danger of inflated titles in small teams Why "Head of Operations" often creates clarity without compensation confusion The real definition of an EOS Integrator—and why most teams aren't ready for one COO Reality Check Why the COO role is defined by the CEO's strengths and weaknesses The 7 types of COOs and which ones show up most in real estate How to decide if you truly need a COO—or just better execution Compensation & Personality Fit Why operations team members value stability over incentives Why bonuses don't motivate ops roles the way they motivate agents Disc profile considerations for operational leadership The importance of tenacity and execution over ideas Resources & Mentions Honey Badger Nation – Community and leadership resources EOS / Traction / Rocket Fuel – Referenced frameworks (with important clarifications) CoachKitchens.ai – AI-powered coaching tool for real estate leaders Joel Perso – The Growth Centric Fractional COO services for 7-figure real estate teams Contact: joel@thegrowthcentric.com Final Takeaway More leads don't fix broken operations—they expose them. If you want to scale without chaos, burnout, or constant firefighting, you must hire intentionally, in order, and with clarity. This episode lays the groundwork for building an operational foundation that supports growth instead of suffocating it. "If you don't counterbalance growth with operations, you're not building a business—you're building a treadmill." - John Kitchens Connect with Us: Instagram: @johnkitchenscoachLinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoachFacebook: @johnkitchenscoach If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    56 min
  • #756: State of Business 2026 with Gogo Bethke

    #756: State of Business 2026 with Gogo Bethke
    Jan 13 2026
    Episode Overview

    In this episode, John Kitchens is joined by Gogo Bethke for a high-level, real-world conversation on where real estate, leadership, and technology are heading next.

    Fresh off one of the fastest-moving years the industry has ever seen, John and Gogo break down how AI, automation, and social media are fundamentally changing how agents work, market, and scale. Gogo shares how she's leveraged technology to reduce her workload to 15 hours a week while increasing revenue—and why the agents who embrace AI without losing the human connection will dominate in 2026 and beyond.

    This episode is a masterclass on CEO thinking, time leverage, social media strategy, and building a business that funds your life instead of consuming it.

    Key Topics Covered AI, Automation & Working Less While Making More

    • Why AI is collapsing time and accelerating opportunity

    • How Gogo reduced her workweek to 15 hours without sacrificing growth

    • Using AI as leverage—not a replacement for leadership

    • The danger of trading hours for dollars in a scalable world

    Knowing Your Hourly Worth as a CEO

    • How to calculate your real hourly rate

    • Why saying "yes" to the wrong activities steals from your future

    • The difference between good ideas and great ideas

    • Creating decision filters that protect your time and energy

    Social Media Strategy for 2026

    • Why social media will be the easiest lead-generation channel moving forward

    • Short-form vs. long-form content and how each plays a role

    • Using stories for daily connection and feeds as your digital storefront

    • Why consistency—not luck—wins the algorithm

    AI-Powered Content & Marketing

    • Creating content without being on camera

    • Using AI to clone voice, style, and messaging

    • Turning social media into a shoppable asset

    • How to create once and distribute everywhere

    Community, Leadership & Human Connection

    • Why human connection becomes more valuable as AI scales

    • Building culture and community inside large organizations

    • Celebrating agents, gifting, and creating belonging at scale

    • Why unreasonable hospitality is the new competitive advantage

    The Future of Real Estate Agents

    • Why lead generation will get easier—but closing will matter more

    • The agents who will struggle vs. the ones who will thrive

    • Why professionalism, negotiation skills, and trust are non-negotiable

    • Adapting faster than the market instead of fighting it

    Resources & Mentions

    • Expert Mentors Live 2026

    • Go High Level – CRM & automation platform

    • ChatGPT & AI Content Tools

    • Giftology by John Ruhlin

    • Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara

    • The GoGet Community by Gogo Bethke

    Final Takeaway

    The future doesn't belong to the busiest agents—it belongs to the most leveraged ones.

    AI will not replace great agents, but it will expose average ones. The agents who win in 2026 and beyond will be those who understand their value, protect their time, embrace technology, and double down on human connection.

    As Gogo Bethke puts it: work smarter, lead intentionally, and build a business that gives you your life back.

    Connect with Us:
    • Instagram: @johnkitchenscoach
    • LinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoach
    • Facebook: @johnkitchenscoach

    If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    1 h et 4 min
  • #755: Timeless Leadership: Building Relationships, Businesses, and Legacy That Last with Jeff Kitchens

    #755: Timeless Leadership: Building Relationships, Businesses, and Legacy That Last with Jeff Kitchens
    Jan 8 2026
    Episode Overview

    In this episode of the John Kitchens Coach Podcast, John Kitchens sits down with his uncle, Jeff Kitchens, for a powerful, principles-driven conversation on leadership, relationships, and building businesses that stand the test of time.

    Jeff brings decades of experience across retail, finance, mortgage, real estate, and brokerage leadership—and distills it all into a simple but rare framework: timing, relationships, and follow-up. From sweating the small details to creating unforgettable client experiences, this episode is a masterclass in professionalism, long-term thinking, and leading with intention.

    They also dive into recruiting, retention, mergers and acquisitions, exit strategies, and why most agents and business owners fail to treat their business like a true asset. If you want to build a real estate business—or any business—that creates opportunity, freedom, and legacy, this conversation delivers timeless lessons you can apply immediately.

    Key Topics Covered The Foundation of Excellence

    • Why "sweating the small stuff" is the difference between chaos and consistency

    • How standards, discipline, and professionalism compound over time

    • The real meaning of customer service and unreasonable hospitality

    Timing, Relationships & Follow-Up

    • Jeff's three non-negotiables for long-term success

    • Why timing beats pressure in recruiting, sales, and acquisitions

    • How consistent follow-up creates opportunities years later

    Recruiting & Retaining Top Talent

    • Why internal recruiting matters more than external recruiting

    • How to identify and avoid "hoppers" who poison team culture

    • The small acts of recognition that keep top producers loyal

    Leadership & Team Dynamics

    • Hiring people smarter than you—and why it accelerates growth

    • How to read people, body language, and energy as a leader

    • Why acknowledgment matters more than most leaders realize

    Business Ownership & Exit Strategy

    • Why every business needs a "will" and an exit plan

    • How to think about valuing your business as a true asset

    • The hidden risk of building a business that can't run without you

    Mergers, Acquisitions & Industry Consolidation

    • What motivates brokers and owners to sell—or merge

    • The role of fatigue, timing, and clarity in exit decisions

    • Why many owners don't actually know what their business is worth

    AI, Wisdom & the Future of Leadership

    • Why AI is a tool—not a replacement for critical thinking

    • The shift from knowledge-based value to wisdom-based leadership

    • How experienced leaders will win by questioning, not blindly trusting, technology

    Resources & Mentions

    • Hug Your Customers by Jack Mitchell

    • Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara

    • Honey Badger Nation

    • John Kitchens Executive Coaching → JohnKitchens.coach

    Final Takeaway

    Success doesn't come from chasing shiny objects—it comes from mastering fundamentals. Jeff Kitchens reminds us that businesses grow when leaders commit to relationships, follow through relentlessly, and treat people with respect and intention.

    Whether you're recruiting agents, serving clients, or planning your exit, this episode reinforces a powerful truth: If you take care of people and stay consistent, the opportunities will always come back around.

    "If you take care of your clients, they'll take care of you. If you're focused on taking care of yourself, you've already missed the point." – Jeff Kitchens

    Connect with Us:
    • Instagram: @johnkitchenscoach
    • LinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoach
    • Facebook: @johnkitchenscoach

    If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    56 min
  • #754: The 93% Problem: How AI and GEO Are Rewriting Agent Visibility with Eric Post

    #754: The 93% Problem: How AI and GEO Are Rewriting Agent Visibility with Eric Post
    Dec 31 2025
    Episode Overview In this timely and thought-provoking episode of the John Kitchens Coach Podcast, John Kitchens is joined by returning guest Eric Post, AI strategist, founder of Huzi.ai, and one of the sharpest minds at the intersection of technology, consumer behavior, and real estate. This conversation goes far beyond "how to use AI." John and Eric unpack the real threat and opportunity in the market today: the AI-powered consumer. As consumers gain instant access to information, agents can no longer win by being the knowledge holder. Instead, success now belongs to the wisdom worker—the advisor who brings clarity, discernment, experience, and trust. They explore how the internet has shifted from a place of search to a place of conversations, why SEO alone is no longer enough, and how agents must rethink branding, content, leadership, and customer experience to stay relevant in 2025 and beyond. This episode is a masterclass in AI, leadership, consumer psychology, and designing unforgettable client experiences in a rapidly changing world. Key Topics Covered The Rise of the AI-Powered Consumer Why the #1 consumer complaint is no longer lack of communication—but "I know more than my agent" How AI has shifted the internet from search to conversation What it means when 90%+ of AI interactions never click through to a website Why Zillow is no longer the real threat—and what is From Knowledge Worker to Wisdom Worker Why memorizing contracts, stats, and processes is no longer a competitive advantage The difference between information and discernment How top agents win by understanding people, not just data Why "good enough" agents are the most vulnerable in an AI world Trust, Purpose, and the New Agent Value Proposition Defining your role when consumers already have the answers Why agents must become guides, not order-takers The importance of emotional intelligence, intuition, and presence How trust is built through personalization, not speed alone Content, Branding & Being Found in an AI World Why agents must start writing content for both humans and AI The difference between SEO, AEO (Answer Engine Optimization), and GEO (Generative Engine Optimization) Why upstream life events (death, divorce, debt, downsizing) matter more than listing searches How to position yourself as the authority AI pulls from—not just another result Efficiency vs. Experience: Choosing Your Lane Why the "middle ground" is the most dangerous place to operate The difference between budget efficiency and premium experience Why memorable, designed client experiences create defensibility How "unreasonable hospitality" becomes the ultimate moat AI as a Force Multiplier (Not a Crutch) Why AI should augment thinking—not replace discipline How tools like Huzi.ai, Spark Pad, and Halo help agents scale wisdom Using AI to clarify niche, ICP, and proprietary processes faster than ever The danger of letting AI lead instead of using it intentionally Resources & Mentions Huzi.ai – Purpose-built AI for real estate professionals Spark Pad – AI workspace for clarity, messaging, and strategy Halo – AI visibility and monitoring across ChatGPT, Gemini, Claude, Perplexity, and more CoachKitchens.ai – Custom AI tools built for Agent to CEO operators The Empty Room by Eric Post – Manifesto on wisdom, creativity, and AI Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara Rick Rubin – Creativity, taste, and intuition references Final Takeaway AI isn't replacing real estate agents—but it is replacing average ones. In a world where consumers have instant access to information, the agents who win are those who bring wisdom, clarity, trust, and experience to the table. Speed and efficiency are now table stakes. Differentiation comes from insight, personalization, and the ability to guide people through complex, emotional decisions. As Eric Post makes clear, the future belongs to those who design memorable experiences, understand the AI-powered consumer, and intentionally evolve from knowledge workers into true advisors. "You can't compete with AI on speed or memory. You win by being human—by bringing wisdom, taste, and discernment." – Eric Post Connect with Us: Instagram: @johnkitchenscoachLinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoachFacebook: @johnkitchenscoach If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    59 min
  • #753: Emotional Resilience for High-Performing Leaders with Matt Townsend

    #753: Emotional Resilience for High-Performing Leaders with Matt Townsend
    Dec 24 2025
    Episode Overview In this episode, John Kitchens sits down with Dr. Matt Townsend for a powerful, reflective conversation on emotional resilience, leadership maturity, and what high performers must leave behind to move forward. As the pace of business accelerates and uncertainty continues to rise, John and Matt unpack why most leaders feel overwhelmed—not because they lack ability, but because they're carrying outdated thoughts, unhealthy emotions, and destructive habits into the future. This episode is a deep dive into growth through subtraction: letting go of what no longer serves you so you can step into clarity, confidence, and CEO-level leadership. If you're heading into a new season of business or life and feeling stuck, this conversation will help you reset, refocus, and lead with intention. Key Topics Covered Why Everything Feels Faster (and Heavier) The acceleration of business, information, and expectations How "snacking culture" and constant noise erode focus and clarity Why overwhelm is often a signal—not a failure Leaving Behind Unhelpful Thoughts Common limiting beliefs leaders carry into every year: "I have to do it all myself" "My team can't perform" "I'm not good enough for this market" Why you can't solve problems at the same level of thinking that created them Identifying the thoughts you're most embarrassed to admit—and why those matter most Emotions, Energy, and Leadership Impact How unresolved emotions leak into tone, body language, and presence Why untransformed pain always gets transmitted to others Understanding the "second arrow": how emotional reactions cause more damage than the event itself Breaking the Loop: Thoughts → Feelings → Actions How feelings make thoughts permanent Why repeated emotional associations create stuck patterns Learning to separate events from identity and meaning The Observer Mindset The difference between being your thoughts vs. observing them Why awareness creates power and choice How emotional resiliency starts with noticing—not forcing—change Habits, Dopamine, and Self-Sabotage Cheap dopamine vs. earned dopamine How modern habits (phones, news, scrolling) quietly drain courage Why habits persist until you sit with their true cost Using mindfulness to reprioritize and dissolve unhealthy patterns Values as the Foundation for Growth Why goals without values don't stick Defining values as how you do the work—not just what you want A powerful exercise: writing what you want people to say about you on your 90th birthday Character Strengths & Sustainable Confidence Why knowing your strengths changes how you show up as a leader Using strengths as superpowers—not trying to "fix" weaknesses How self-awareness fuels confidence, resilience, and clarity Leadership Is Not a Solo Sport Why growth rarely happens in isolation The importance of mirrors, mentors, masterminds, and accountability How collaboration accelerates awareness and shortens the learning curve Resources & Mentions AuthenticHappiness.org – VIA Character Strengths Assessment Unwinding Anxiety by Judson Brewer Deep Work by Cal Newport Concepts from emotional resiliency, mindfulness, and cognitive diffusion John Kitchens Executive Coaching → https://johnkitchens.coach Final Takeaway You don't move forward by adding more—you move forward by letting go. When leaders release unhelpful thoughts, unresolved emotions, and unhealthy habits, they reclaim energy, clarity, and agency. True growth doesn't come from forcing change, but from awareness, values-driven action, and choosing to lead from your highest self—not your survival instincts. Happy Holidays everyone. "If you can observe your thoughts and feelings, you are not them—and that's where real power begins." Connect with Us: Instagram: @johnkitchenscoachLinkedIn: @johnkitchenscoachFacebook: @johnkitchenscoach If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a review. Stay tuned for more insights and strategies from the top minds. See you next time! 🔥
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    44 min