Kink 101: Fetish vs. Kink, Power Exchange & Hot Wifing with The Kink Consultant

We're stepping outside our usual non-monogamy lane and into the wide, wild world of kink with special guest Amanda Dames, aka The Kink Consultant. Amanda is a certified somatic sex & relationship coach and sexologist (and former NYC dominatrix!) who breaks down the real difference between a "kink" and a "fetish," why labels actually help you find yourself, and how power exchange, hot wifing, pre-claiming, and reclaiming sex all fit on the same spectrum. We also get into the light-bulb communication hack that took Adam's breath away, healthy boundaries around aftercare, and why justice might be Pris's real kink.

• Kink vs. fetish: what's actually the difference
• Amanda's journey from curious kid to NYC pro-domme to kink coach
• Foot fetishes, power exchange, and why "normal" kink is a spectrum
• The $20 light bulb trick for signaling dominant energy
• Hot wifing vs. hot husbanding, pre-claiming and reclaiming sex
• Compartmentalizing fantasy without cheating
• Aftercare, boundaries, and honest communication in ENM relationships

• Website: amandadames.com (grab her free guide, "Speaking Your Desires With Confidence")
• Podcast: The Kink Consultant Podcast
• Instagram: @the_kinkconsultant
• Facebook: The Kink Consultant
• TikTok: @the_kinkconsultant
• YouTube: @thekinkconsultant
• Email: info@thekinkconsultant.com
• Meet Amanda in Jamaica: swingcation.com - use code TKC50

ProDX Health - At-home STI & hormone testing, no waiting rooms, no awkward conversations. Use code BEYOMONO at prodxhealth.com for 15% off year-round.

SDC - Use code 38236 for the ultimate lifestyle community.

3Fun - Use code TK11932 for the app made for couples and singles exploring together.

FirmTech - Use code BEYOMONO for performance gear built for the lifestyle.

• Website: beyond-monogamy.com - full episode library, listener confessionals, and our brand-new live show launching soon
• Streaming Radio: Catch us live every Thursday at 2:00 PM & 7:00 PM Central on Full Swap Radio
• Beyond Monogamy Live at Club Eden San Antonio - join us in person!
• Krazy Winter Nights KC (Feb 19-21, 2027) - use code BEYOMONO at krazykasbh.com

Enjoyed the show? Follow, rate, and leave us a review - it genuinely helps! Share this episode with a kink-curious friend.

Beyond Monogamy with Adam & Pris — This week's Quickie tackles one of the most relatable topics in ethical non-monogamy: that flash of jealousy that hits in the moment, even when everything else feels solid.

An anonymous listener sent in a voicemail describing a familiar scene: a good time at a pool party or meet-and-greet, a partner doing something he thought he was okay with... and then that sudden hand squeeze or whispered "please don't." Adam and Pris read the voicemail live and dig into it — no filter, no judgment.

• Why in-the-moment jealousy is normal (even for people who don't consider themselves jealous)
• The "code" system Adam & Pris use to signal discomfort without killing the vibe
• How alcohol lowers inhibitions AND lowers your ability to process what you're feeling
• Why you shouldn't feel guilty for pulling back, even when your partner "attends to you well"
• The one time Adam & Pris broke up over a jealousy fight — and what fixed it

SDC (Swingers Date Club) — use code 38236 for a discount on your membership.
3Fun — the app for open-minded couples and singles, use code TK11932.
FirmTech — use code BEYOMONO at checkout.
ProDx Health — use code BEYOMONO for savings on your order.

Snoozy Gummies — because after all that processing and hashing it out, you deserve some good sleep. Get 15% off with our link: snwbl.io/snoozy/ADAM89158

Catch us at Krazy Winter Nights KC, February 19–21, 2027 — grab tickets at krazykasbh.com and use code BEYOMONO for a discount.

Catch us live on Full Swap Radio every Thursday at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central at fullswapradio.com. And coming soon: our own live show, Thursdays 7–8 PM Central right on our website!

Visit beyond-monogamy.com for the full episode library, our listener confessional line, upcoming events, and everything Beyond Monogamy. Got a question, confession, or "does anyone else do this" moment? Leave us a voicemail — you might end up on a future Quickie!

She's been with over a dozen people in the lifestyle — and has never once had an orgasm with any of them. Meanwhile, her husband comes every time. More than once. At the club.

This week, Adam & Pris dive headfirst into one of the most common — and least talked-about — issues in the lifestyle: the orgasm gap. Is it a vetting problem? A communication problem? A men-are-oblivious problem? (Spoiler: yes, yes, and yes.)

• Why the orgasm gap is real — and gets worse in the lifestyle
• Why she comes easily at home but not at the club
• How to vet for pleasure-focused partners
• The power of over-communication before you ever get to the back room
• Toys, body language, cheat codes, and how to advocate for your own pleasure
• Is everyone just out for themselves? Adam & Pris give the honest answer

Find everything Beyond Monogamy at beyond-monogamy.com — including our 100% anonymous confessional. Drop your story and it might become our next episode.

Catch us on fullswapradio.com every Thursday at 2PM & 7PM Central.

📅 Krazy Winter Nights – Kansas City | Feb 19–21, 2027 | krazykasbh.com | Code: BEYOMONO

• SDC – The world's largest lifestyle community. Code: 38236
• 3Fun – The #1 app for couples and singles in the lifestyle. Code: TK11932
• FirmTech – Performance rings designed for men who want to bring their best. Code: BEYOMONO
• ProDx Health – At-home STI testing, discreet and fast. Code: BEYOMONO