This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr Almost had a surprise up his sleeve — again.

Mrs Almost was whisked away to the Balmer Lawn Hotel and Spa in Brockenhurst in the New Forest. A balcony room overlooking the cricket pitch, New Forest ponies and cattle roaming freely outside, a four hour spa package with steam room, sauna, an ice room that was bizarrely relaxing and a relaxation room with the most comfortable chairs we have ever sat in. No phones. No clocks. Absolute bliss.

The massages, however, were an experience. Mr Almost requested medium pressure. What he got was a petite therapist, two elbows and a firm determination to find every knot in his shoulders. He did not say anything. He is fine. Mostly.

In the evening we sat in the outdoor pavilion with three pints of Cornish Orchards cider — crisp, clean and straight in at number three in the official Mr & Mrs Almost cider rankings — before heading to dinner for a côte de boeuf. Steak on the bone, served on a board, chunky chips, vine tomatoes and a peppercorn sauce made entirely of peppercorns. We were last to leave. We have no regrets.

Running is still very much happening — new routes, hilly terrain and a knee that is not happy on the pavement. The Race for Life is five weeks away. And we might be going live on the day. Watch this space.

Almost Blooming — the front garden transformation continues. Plum slate, weed fabric, bark, the Acer is thriving and the flamingo bush has been transplanted. No more mowing. Ever. The front garden is now a wildlife oasis and we are very proud of it.

We also tackled the cars with the jet wash, had a cashless run in at Cineworld and watched Believe Me on ITV — the John Warboys true crime drama with Daniel Mays. Gripping, important and not easy watching.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost are on half term and the sun has not let them down.

The gym hit thirty six degrees so we took the running outside instead — a 5K with the brand new bumbags, keys, phones and EarPods all sorted. Knee is complaining a little but the Race for Life is six weeks away and we are finishing it.

Mr Almost went suit shopping for the new job. Next delivered. Slim fit calves did not. One lovely suit, four shirts and a Helly Hansen lightweight raincoat ordered all the way from the Netherlands. The new job is getting very real.

Almost Blooming had a complete change of heart this week. The acorns are almost gone, the lawn mower has gone to the tip and the front garden has been completely reimagined. One side is now a full plant border with the new Acer planted in the ground, a repositioned bird bath and weed suppressant topped with bark. The other side is plum slate from Wickes — twelve bags down, twenty more to go. Decking plans are in the pipeline. Watch this space.

We’ve been watching The Cage on BBC iPlayer — Sheridan Smith, a casino setting, a slow start that absolutely pays off, five episodes and a twist we did not see coming. Stick with it.

De-Chox is almost over for the British Heart Foundation. Almost. Chocolate is coming home.

Tipple of the Week is icy fresh lemon water — ice cubes, sliced lemons, no pips, very cold and highly recommended in a heatwave.

Almost Edible this week is a breakfast BBQ — pork and apple sausages, smoked bacon on the griddle, hash browns cooked from frozen with the lid down as an oven, vine cherry tomatoes around the edge and baked beans on the side. Half eight in the morning. Parasol up. Eating outside. It felt like a holiday.

Oh — and we were supposed to go to Bournemouth. We almost made it. Almost.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr Almost had a surprise up his sleeve — and it involved hunny pots.

Mrs Almost was whisked away to the Ashdown Park Hotel in the Ashdown Forest for a Winnie the Pooh themed afternoon tea celebrating one hundred years of Winnie. Ridgeview sparkling wine from Sussex — the same wine served at the Queen’s Jubilee — a Vienna coffee, finger sandwiches, sausage rolls, scones with honey for the very first time and three beautiful honey themed cakes. The service felt like royalty. We will absolutely be going back. Photos are on our socials.

The Race for Life countdown is on — running is going well, the Peloton live class saw Mr Almost finish 106th out of 243 on his very first attempt and the bum bags are ready for the next outdoor run.

GCSE exams are in full swing. She is handling them brilliantly and we are very proud. The provisional licence saga has reached its conclusion — a paper form, a cheque and a photo that needs signing. The ball is firmly in her court. We are done.

Running Point is back for season two on Netflix — Kate Hudson, brilliant cast, binge watched in one sitting and series three is already confirmed. Highly recommend.

Almost Blooming this week — the acorns have won the front garden. Hundreds of tiny oak trees, deep roots, a rake and a tiller are now involved. Tomato plants and a pepper plant are in grow bags. Slug pellets are down. We are manifesting a bumper harvest.

De-Chox is in its final stretch for the British Heart Foundation — one week and a half left. We can do this. The M&S chocolate custard creams are waiting.

Tipple of the Week is Fortnum & Mason Christmas Tea — in May, three scoops not four and highly recommended.

And Almost Edible is Schwartz spaghetti carbonara packet mix — bacon, mushrooms, tagliatelle, a separate pan for the mushrooms and a generous amount of black pepper. Quick, easy and genuinely very good.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost have one of their most eventful weeks yet — and it starts with a GCSE art emergency.

Our daughter ran out of white paint and indigo mid art exam. Mr Almost dropped everything, raced to Hobbycraft, pulled up at the school and walked to reception with the words “there’s a GCSE paint emergency.” The school took it straight up personally. The paint arrived in time. She finished. We’re calling it a win.

Running is still very much happening — another 5K outdoors, a private wood, some very steep hills and a brand new running bum bag that we are both unreasonably excited about. The Race for Life countdown is on and we are going to finish it.

We escaped to Sheffield Park Gardens for a National Trust day out — four lakes, acres of stunning grounds, a lightning struck tree, baby geese, a very shy peacock and a very bold white peacock that took a particular liking to Mr Almost while Honey was in the sling. We will be going back in every season.

Balls Up on Amazon Prime comes highly recommended — Mark Wahlberg, Paul Walter Hauser and Sacha Baron Cohen in an action comedy that is very different in the best possible way. Three to four stars.

Almost Blooming this week — the mouse has a friend, they are building a nest and they are very cute. The ants in the bathroom are less cute. Nan’s terracotta pot now has a mint plant in it. The bonsai are looking spectacular.

De-Chox update — Mr Almost nearly didn’t make it out of Marks and Spencer alive. Chocolate covered custard creams. Cookie with chocolate chips. Blueberry muffin was the compromise. We are still in this.

Tipple of the Week is Thatchers cider on the Perfect Draft — sweet, refreshing and a solid three out of five. Orchard Pig and Hawkstone still ahead in the rankings.

And Almost Edible is Loyd Grossman Tikka Masala in the slow cooker — chicken, potatoes, carrots, onions, naan bread and samosas. Eight hours. Very edible. Not just almost.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost have some very big news — the London trip mystery from a few weeks ago is finally revealed. Mr Almost has been approached by a new company, handed in his notice and starts his exciting new role in London on the 1st of June. We are absolutely thrilled.

The outdoor run has finally happened. We headed to our local park — the actual Race for Life venue — and completed 5K in fifty three minutes and twenty five seconds. Hills, a few spots of rain and a daughter who started off very cocky and ended up at the back complaining about her legs. She still completed it though. We’re all proud.

The prom dress has been collected, shoes found in ten minutes flat at New Look for a fraction of the expected price and a gorgeous set of sterling silver jewellery — sun, moon and stars — picked up at a lovely little shop in the Bentall Centre in Kingston. Honey came too. Turns out Kingston is very dog friendly.

We stopped for pizza at Pizza Express by the River Thames — burnt ends barbecue pizza, hot honey dough balls and sparkle drinks all round. Highly recommend.

Almost Blooming this week — two garden centres, a hanging basket we built ourselves and flamingo pink stones for the bonsai bed. The photos are on our socials.

De-Chox is underway for the British Heart Foundation. It is going well. Mostly. The post office chocolate stand nearly won. It did not.

Tipple of the Week is Hotel Chocolat banana cold chocolate — technically chocolate, but it’s a drink so it doesn’t count. We’ve decided.

And Almost Edible is homemade chilli and nachos in the garden with the patio heater on. Romantic, spicy and absolutely worth making twice.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost hit double figures — episode ten — and it’s one of the most personal episodes yet.

Couch to 5K is complete. Eleven weeks, two forty-five minute sessions to finish and a personal best on speed. The outdoor run is coming — we’ve promised you and we’re not backing out. We also ditched the car for two days this week, walked to Screwfix, sat in a sunny park and discovered the Costa OOB — a vanilla nutty drink that tastes exactly like a Bakewell tart. Highly recommend.

We’re supporting the British Heart Foundation De-Chox this May — giving up chocolate for the whole month. There’s a very personal reason behind it and we talk about it openly this week. If you’d like to join us or support the cause, we’d love to hear from you.

There was also a leavers shirt. Iron on transfer paper. Nine o’clock at night. A practice run on a spare piece of cloth. And a Death Stranding design that somehow came together in the end. We are never doing that again.

Honey’s Butternut Box gets a well deserved five paws. Grace on ITV gets a very enthusiastic recommendation — John Simm, Richie Campbell, six series, one cliffhanger we are not ready to talk about. Almost Blooming this week features baby oak trees, a mouse in the cupboard and one very startled Mr Almost.

Tipple of the Week is Orchard Pig cider from the Perfect Draft machine — three degrees, Somerset fresh and absolutely worth it. And Almost Edible is a proper family lasagne. Dolmio sauces, lots of cheese, comfort food at its best.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost head to Ashdown Forest for a surprise walk — and it turns out to be the most beautiful one yet.

Chelwood Vachery is five kilometres of bluebells, streams, Exmoor ponies, woodland paths and one very carried dog. Honey made it as far as the car park. Mr Almost had a secret up his sleeve — a cheeky ice cream stop at Heaven Farm on the way back. Rolo and Biscoff. Obviously.

Couch to 5K is on the home straight — two eighteen minute runs, a personal best and twelve weeks to go until the Race for Life. We are going outside to run very soon. The treadmill can only prepare you so much.

The provisional driving licence has finally been sent off. After weeks of drama — the forms, the photos, the hair — it turned out all we needed was a passport number and a signature. That was it.

The garage has been decluttered. Fifty million footballs have gone to a better place. The tip workers were very happy about it. Before and after videos are up on our socials.

Almost Blooming makes its audio debut this week — complete with its very own jingle. The garden is waking up, the wood mouse has moved in and the artificial grass has been hoovered. Yes, hoovered.

And Almost Edible this week is the first ever rotisserie chicken on the BBQ — trussed up with butcher’s twine, seasoned with garlic salt and mixed herbs, one hour forty five minutes rotating over the coals and the result was juicy, golden and absolutely worth it.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️

This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr & Mrs Almost launch a brand new segment — Almost Blooming — and it starts with bonsai trees, a very sad Chinese Elm and a visit to Peter Chan’s award-winning bonsai nursery in Surrey.

We took an unexpected trip to London — a solo walk along the Thames, Borough Market at its busiest, more cheese than either of us have ever seen and a jackfruit the size of a small child.

We’ve been binge watching Hidden Assets on BBC iPlayer — three series in three days. Irish crime drama following the Criminal Assets Bureau, full of twists, brilliant characters and one very memorable tackle. Highly recommend.

The Race for Life is thirteen weeks away. The Couch to 5K is pushing harder than ever on the new Peloton Tread. The doctor has confirmed it’s allergies not asthma — and he spent most of the call sneezing.

Tipple of the Week is Belgian hot chocolate — low calorie, very satisfying and now hidden in the cupboard from everyone else.

And Almost Edible this week is Las Iguanas in Brighton. Stringy mozzarella on the nachos, disappointing enchiladas and a bill that made us wince. We won’t be going back. Old El Paso kit from the supermarket is officially better. There. We said it.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️