This week on Almost the Weekend, Mr Almost had a surprise up his sleeve — again.

Mrs Almost was whisked away to the Balmer Lawn Hotel and Spa in Brockenhurst in the New Forest. A balcony room overlooking the cricket pitch, New Forest ponies and cattle roaming freely outside, a four hour spa package with steam room, sauna, an ice room that was bizarrely relaxing and a relaxation room with the most comfortable chairs we have ever sat in. No phones. No clocks. Absolute bliss.

The massages, however, were an experience. Mr Almost requested medium pressure. What he got was a petite therapist, two elbows and a firm determination to find every knot in his shoulders. He did not say anything. He is fine. Mostly.

In the evening we sat in the outdoor pavilion with three pints of Cornish Orchards cider — crisp, clean and straight in at number three in the official Mr & Mrs Almost cider rankings — before heading to dinner for a côte de boeuf. Steak on the bone, served on a board, chunky chips, vine tomatoes and a peppercorn sauce made entirely of peppercorns. We were last to leave. We have no regrets.

Running is still very much happening — new routes, hilly terrain and a knee that is not happy on the pavement. The Race for Life is five weeks away. And we might be going live on the day. Watch this space.

Almost Blooming — the front garden transformation continues. Plum slate, weed fabric, bark, the Acer is thriving and the flamingo bush has been transplanted. No more mowing. Ever. The front garden is now a wildlife oasis and we are very proud of it.

We also tackled the cars with the jet wash, had a cashless run in at Cineworld and watched Believe Me on ITV — the John Warboys true crime drama with Daniel Mays. Gripping, important and not easy watching.

Pull up a chair. You’re one of us now. 🎙️