A Rotten Fridge, Clogged Pipes, and My Initiation into New York City

I five months in near-total silence on my grandparents' home in Topeka, Kansas trusting myself and embracing the quiet nothingness of the in-between. After being sent a blaring sign from The Universe that it was time to leave Denver and move to New York City, I knew I needed to deepen my relationship to myself and nervous system before I did. Then, it was time. Every step of the process of finding a new apartment and planning my trip across the country, I checked-in with my body and waited until it felt warm, light, and gooey before I said yes.

And then I pulled up to my new Brooklyn apartment, walked through the door, and the place was trashed. Literally.

This is my first ever solo episode. I'm pulling back the curtain on the last year of my life. The breakup that broke seriously engrained pattern. The profound boredom that cracked everything open. The decision to stop running away from places and start walking intentionally toward them. And what it actually means to be in the egg phase of the cycle of transformation instead of the cocoon — because they are not the same thing, and the distinction changes everything.

In today’s episode, we’ll dive into:

• The "What Would My Favorite Self Do?" experiment that started as a response to a breakup and became a complete life overhaul
• Why I went to Kansas before I went to New York — and why that was never the consolation prize
• The four stages of the transformation cycle and how they map onto the lunar cycle, the seasons, the menstrual cycle, and the butterfly
• What the void actually feels like from the inside (hint: 50 shades of gray, not in the fun way... but also kind of in the fun way)
• The difference between running away from a place and intentionally walking toward one
• How a rotten fridge, three plumbers, and six hours with Kevin became a spiritual initiation
• What it means to check your body for a "yes" — and what warm, light, and gooey actually feels like
• Why my inner child panicked when I crossed back into New York — and how I handled it
• The ventilator metaphor — and what it actually costs to take yourself off life support
• Saturn into Aries, synchronicities in the street, and the weekend that made the decision for me
• Why talking about the move would have taken me out of it — and what I chose instead
• The caterpillar phase: what it looks like to consume, grow, and stretch without ripping
• How Magnetic Habits Bingo kept me grounded through 305 days of complete upheaval

This episode is for:

• The ones who are mid-void and needed someone to tell them what's actually happening
• The ones who have run away from every place they've ever lived and are starting to wonder if it's them
• The ones whose body is screaming "not like this, not this fast" even when the decision is right
• The ones who have been calling it "the cocoon" when really they've been in the egg this whole time
• The ones whose external world is currently a complete disaster and are desperately trying to find the metaphor
• The ones who are ready to stop settling for relationships and cities and versions of themselves they've already outgrown
• The ones who want permission to do the big thing slowly
• And anyone who’s nosy and just wants to know why I went dark for 3+ weeks on social media

Ready to go through your own transformation?

The waitlist for Metamorphosis — my 12-week group immersion for self-alchemy — is now open! Over three-months starting in March, you'll meet and build unbreakable self-loyalty with your Inner Self, Younger Self, Shadow Self, Higher Self, and Future Self (and Spirit Guides) so you can stop suffering your own worst enemy and start thriving as your own best friend. There are only 13 spots. Want in?

Join the waitlist here: ashleybyjones.com/metamorphosisOr DM me directly to learn more.

Wanna come yap with me about the cycle of transformation or moving insanity?Instagram: @ashley.b.jonesWebsite: ashleybyjones.com