You are lost in the woods, your cell phone is dead...naturally, and the sun is setting fast. You know what? Let's also throw in some spooky eyes peering at you between the trees, some branches breaking, and of course, loud growling coming from a distance. There. That's better. The scene is set. So yeah, luckily for you, Frederick, a dapper-looking ghost appears. Phew, right? He tells you there's a place nearby, he can take you to that has a landline. Which is believable because there's no signal out there. You question nothing. Upon your amazement, Frederick takes you to a circus. You find it a little strange there's a circus in the middle of nowhere, but Frederick assures you it's fine. You question nothing. Then Frederick tells you the catch. He warns you the circus is quite dangerous but insists he can get you to the telephone safely. Now you start questioning stuff but decide to go with him anyway, because if you didn't then there would be no story, thus making this book nonexistent. Besides, you have no friends and you're enjoying the social aspect so far.

As soon as you enter the circus, you notice this is no ordinary circus. Frederick reminds you not to talk to anyone or touch anything like you're some kind of disobedient five-year-old with emotional issues. You feel personally attacked. You get over it. When someone mentions about consequences being dire you need to choose your battles. As you explore further into the circus and horror envelops around you, you begin to question your decision-making skills. You want to turn back. Frederick has bad news. You can't. You have to make it to the other side. This becomes a problem because Frederick is acting weirder and weirder. You're not sure trusting a dead person was very wise, then panic does a little meet-and-greet. Is there really a telephone? Is there a way to escape? What if those creatures out in the woods were merely deer looking for a hug? Can you even eat the cotton candy? What if it's a rotary phone? No one knows how to use those godforsaken things. My god, what have you gotten yourself into? Classic.

Commonsense finally seeps in - there's something about Mary, except this Mary is named Frederick and has a penis. Probably. Also, don't forget he's dead. Frederick acts more and more suspicious as the probability of there being a telephone becomes unrealistic. Something is definitely awry. Will you survive this harrowing place or (pause for dramatic effect) become a part of it? Oh, I almost forgot. You grow a relationship with a mutated carousel horse. It's not that weird. The circus is like a mile long, not like you're going to walk all that way, so finding transportation was necessary. Your bond with it will give you the warm and fuzzies. I promise-ish. Okay. That's it. Consider yourself synopsed.

Are you ready?

It's time to open the big top...Good luck!