What if the way you’ve been trying to communicate is actually preventing the connection you long for, even when your intentions are loving?

In this episode, I introduce the Imago Intentional Dialogue process, a structured communication tool that helped transform my own marriage from separation to recommitment. Rather than focusing on winning arguments or fixing problems, this model creates safety, understanding, and genuine connection, even during difficult conversations.

Through an attachment and nervous system informed lens, I walk you step-by-step through the core components of the Dialogue: mirroring, validation, and empathy, along with the opening step, known as the appointment. Together, these tools help partners slow down, reduce dysregulation, and replace defensive communication patterns with conscious connection.

I also explore why conflict often feels so urgent, how nervous system dysregulation shapes communication, and why many arguments are actually about deeper unmet needs rather than surface issues. You’ll hear how even simple shifts, like asking for consent before a difficult conversation, can dramatically change relational dynamics.

This episode serves as preparation for Part 2 of this series, where my husband and I will demonstrate the Dialogue live in an unscripted real-life conversation, followed by Part 3, where I share the moment I first used these tools to transform my own relationship.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in repeating arguments, unheard, misunderstood, or unsure how to repair disconnection, this episode offers a practical starting point for communicating in a way that builds safety rather than eroding it.

In this episode, we explore:

• What the Imago Intentional Dialogue process is and why it works
• The three core steps: mirroring, validation, and empathy
• The power of the “appointment” in creating conversational safety
• Why urgency in conflict can trigger defensive reactions
• How nervous system states shape communication patterns
• The concept of “simultaneous monologuing” and why it blocks connection
• How validation differs from agreement
• Why empathy is about imagination, not mind-reading
• The role of consent and timing in productive conversations
• How structured dialogue can heal attachment wounds
• Why many conflicts reflect deeper unmet needs
• How communication can shift from self-protection to connection

This episode is Part 1 of a three-part series:

➡️ Part 2 (next week): A real, unscripted demonstration of the Imago Dialogue between Trish and her husband Ben
➡️ Part 3 (March 4): The personal story of the moment this process transformed Trish’s own relationship and how you can apply these tools even if your partner isn’t quite ready

If you and your partner are ready to co-create the roadmap to the relationship of your dreams, join us for the next in-person "Getting the Love You Want" Weekend Couples Retreat!

For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders on Instagram , Bluesky or LinkedIn.