Couverture de How Sarma Realised She Was Autistic After Everything Fell Apart

How Sarma Realised She Was Autistic After Everything Fell Apart

How Sarma Realised She Was Autistic After Everything Fell Apart

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 In this meeting of The Late Diagnosis Club, Dr Angela Kingdon welcomes Sarma Melngailis, a late-identified Autistic woman whose life unfolded in public long before she had language for her neurodivergence.Sarma was once a celebrated New York restaurateur and entrepreneur. Years later, she became the subject of global scrutiny following a highly publicised documentary that framed her story through scandal rather than context. She was not diagnosed as Autistic until age 51, after everything had already happened.In this conversation, Sarma speaks candidly about sensory overwhelm, being misread as cold or suspicious, vulnerability to coercive control, and how not knowing she was Autistic shaped her relationships, business decisions, and sense of self. This episode is not about scandal — it’s about what happens when a life is interpreted through the wrong lens, and what becomes possible when the right one finally arrives.🪑 AttendeesChair: Dr Angela Kingdon — Author, community-builder, and Autistic advocateGuest: Sarma Melngailis — late-identified Autistic author and entrepreneurYou: The Listener!🗒️ Meeting AgendaOpening remarks from the ChairMember introduction: Public success without private understandingDiscussion: Late diagnosis, vulnerability, and coercive controlBeing misread: affect, communication, and media narrativesSensory processing, burnout, leadership, animals, justice sensitivity, and belongingKey learningsClub announcements🧾 Minutes from the Meeting1️⃣ Opening RemarksAngela introduces Sarma as a member whose story was widely told before it was widely understood. While the public narrative focused on spectacle and suspicion, Sarma’s lived experience was shaped by sensory overwhelm, misinterpretation, and deep vulnerability — all without the context of an autism diagnosis.2️⃣ Member Introduction: Sarma’s StorySarma describes growing up feeling different without knowing why, gravitating toward misfits and animals, and navigating adulthood with intense sensory sensitivity and a strong drive toward justice and care.Her autism was first suggested not by clinicians, but by viewers of a documentary who recognised themselves in her, many of them late-diagnosed Autistic adults.3️⃣ Discussion HighlightsLate diagnosis at 51: Recognition after public life and collapseMisinterpretation: Flat affect, pauses, and Autistic communication framed as guilt or deceptionCoercive control: How Autistic trust and literal thinking increase vulnerabilityBeing “seen”: Why manipulative attention can feel like understandingPublic narratives: Harm caused by edited stories and missing contextSensory overload: Sound, scent, and cumulative exhaustion in high-pressure environmentsAnimals and connection: Deep attachment as regulation and groundingSafeguards: Learning to listen to trusted outsiders and name red flags4️⃣ Key LearningsNot knowing you’re Autistic can increase vulnerability to exploitationBeing articulate and successful does not protect against harmAutistic affect is often misread through a moral lensClarity does not erase the past — but it can soften self-blameCommunity and outside perspective are protective factorsHaving language for your nervous system changes what you tolerate📌 Notice BoardPeople Magazine — Sarma Melngailis on Autism DiagnosisSarma Melngailis on InstagramThe Girl with the Duck Tattoo — Book WebsiteSarma Raw — Personal Website📣 Club Announcements🎧 The Late Diagnosis Club is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platforms.💬 Join our online meetups and community at latediagnosis.club.📌 Check the LDC Notice Board for Member Contributions💜 There is a small charge — but no one is turned away for lack of funds.🌈 Celebrate autistic voices with early access, ad-free listening, and our full archive at AutisticCulturePlus.com🌐 Visit www.autisticculturepodcast.com📲 Follow us on Instagram: @autisticculturepodcast🎙️ Executive Producers: Amy Burns, Anamaria B Call, Andrew Banner, Anna Goodson, Ashley Apelzin, Audrea Volker, Ben Coulson, Brian Churcek, Cappy Hamper, Carley Biblin, Charlene Deva, Chloe Cross, Clay Duhigg, Clayton Oliver, Danny Dunn, Daria Brown, David Garrido, Emily Burgess, Eric Crane, Erik Stenerud, Fiona Baker, Grace Norman, Helen Shaddock, Jaimie Collins, Jason Killian, Jen Unruh, Jennifer Carpenter, Julia Tretter, Kathie Watson-Gray, Kenneth Knowles, Kira Cotter, Kristine Lang, Kyle Raney, Llew P Williams, Laura Alvarado, Laura De Vito, Laura Provonsha, Lily George, Nelly Darmi, Nigel Rogers, Rachel Miller, Tim Scott, Tyler Kunz, Victoria Steed, Yanina Wood.🎧 Producers: AJ Knight, Bobby Simon, Da Kovac, Eleanor Collins, Emily Griffiths, Hannah Hughes, Jennifer Kemp, Jonas Fløde, Kate F, Katie N Benitez, Kendra Murphy, Lisa Dennys, Logan Wall, Louise Lomas, Melissa Nance, Nicola Owen, Rebecka Johansson, Sam Morris, Sarah Hannah Morris. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...
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