Episode 102 proves that civilization peaked when you could buy a salad bar day pass at Round Table Pizza and it's been downhill ever since.

We're drinking A-O American Light Whiskey from Astoria, Oregon, and somehow this episode still earns a Gold rating despite the absolute nonsense that follows. Oliver joins the podcast while in town testing to become a firefighter/EMS, and instead of easing him into our world, we pick him up from the airport and immediately drag him to a Vancouver dance competition. Welcome to the chaos, kid.

Oliver survives the shock thanks to Smokin Oak BBQ and gets a front-row seat to the endless shuffle between food, beer, and convention centers, which he finds hilarious while the rest of us question our choices. He's also relieved this isn't a high school competition, where food options are nonexistent and you're basically sentenced to Round Table Pizza. Again, RIP salad bar day passes. Society had it figured out.

It's a top-tier Sunday: NFL playoff football, whiskey pours, and chairs reclined just far enough to feel irresponsible. Alex roots for Indiana in the CFB championship purely out of spite because Michael Irvin exists, is deeply annoyed that Miami players get Lamborghinis, and assumes none of them could drive a manual if their lives depended on it.

Jenna has a flat tire on the way to the competition and is momentarily mesmerized by her dashboard lighting up like a Christmas tree until Kati tells her to pull the hell over. Her dad is on scene within 30 minutes, and we're honestly surprised there wasn't a jet hovering overhead.

We solve every problem the NFL has ever had (again), but shockingly nobody calls for our opinions. Mike dominates the dance comp scavenger hunt, finding items at lightning speed and discovering bonus chaos like an entire family wearing matching cat-print vests. We mentally prepare for the next round at a high school, discuss surviving the Oregon Convention Center while dodging tents, lunatics, and people with tails, and debate who Mike should write to about our continued Golden Globes snub.

Mike also invents a new breakfast item that could realistically save America: a twice-baked potato skin with an egg and salsa. And we all agree that if Seattle ever meets New England in the Super Bowl again, Marshawn Lynch needs to be signed to a one-day contract just to run the damn ball in and fix the timeline.

Gold whiskey. Loud opinions. Zero accountability.

It's Episode 101 and Mike is officially on his dance competition retirement tour. With Jackson away at college, Alex is "stuck" at home watching the dogs while Mike racks up five straight weeks of dance comps—and yes, he's thrilled about it.

To survive hours of waiting around, Mike and Alex invent the only thing that makes sense: Dance Comp Bingo. Squares include classics like a dancer crying, someone carrying a full order of coffee, and other things you can't unsee once you start looking.

Naturally, the conversation shifts to what really matters: food. Because food is the lifeblood of parents trapped at dance competitions. From Smokin Oak holding the line with brisket nachos, to Bloody Marys topped with a rib, sausage, and brisket-on-a-stick, the boys break down how to eat your way through comp season.

They also gear up for the annual Crab Feed episode coming in February—which just happens to land on Super Bowl weekend this year. Short episode, full strength Whiskey n Whine.

To celebrate the milestone, we're joined by Brian — friend of the pod, walking booze encyclopedia, and now official five-time guest, which means he's earned something special. A jacket? A trophy? A thong? We haven't decided yet, but he's definitely asking for a rider clause going forward.

Brian gifts the podcast a bottle of Stagg, which is harder to find than a quiet moment in Mike's house, and we immediately spiral into New Year Revolutions (not resolutions). Brian's family actively revolts against old habits and then reviews how badly they did last year. Alex doesn't do yearly goals at all — he's entered a new Taylor Swift–inspired phase of life: the Middle-of-the-Road Era. Staying between the lines counts as growth.

Brian explains that at this point in life he's basically an early-2000s Toyota Corolla — if you ignore the problems long enough, they eventually go away. Alex revisits the year he tried to get healthy and blew out his belly button, appearing nine months pregnant, while Mike offers the obvious fix: just hit it back in with a pan.

We hear stories from Brian's high school days working at the zoo, including how his resting bitch face earned him backstage access and how replacing an artist's tube socks with pink socks ended his zoo concert shopping career forever.

We also demand a modern GoldenEye re-release, learn about Brian's self-created Friend of the Year Award (which Mike and Alex immediately tried to destroy each other to win), and prepare Brian for his first-ever travel sports parent experience — advice delivered by the "sage and experienced duo" who absolutely do not sugarcoat it.

It's everything Whiskey n Whine has ever been: great whiskey, great friends, questionable advice, and stories that somehow made it to Episode 100.

🥃 Cheers to 100.