In this episode of This Is What Survival Taught Me, I talk about a time when I got my hopes up and they were taken away.

I had been talking to someone for five months.

I told them my birthday was coming up.

They said I could come and see them.

Later, they said I couldn’t.

This episode is about how that felt.

About waiting, hoping, and feeling disappointed.

This episode is for anyone who finds birthdays hard.

And for anyone who struggles to trust people.

Episode 3: The First Time I Went Into Care

In this episode of This Is What Survival Taught Me, I return to a memory that didn’t arrive slowly—it arrived all at once. The first time I went into care. No clear explanations. Only soft words like “just for now” and “only for a while.”

Through diary-style poetry and reflection, this episode explores what it feels like to have your life change without warning or choice. It’s about packed bags, adults talking around you, learning how goodbyes don’t always sound like goodbyes—and how silence can become a form of survival.

This episode is for anyone who learned to be “brave” too early, who didn’t have words for grief at the time, and who is still carrying what wasn’t explained.

Content note: themes of childhood separation and foster care.

What survival taught mr is a podcast by Demus Barton . It is a spoken diary