Épisodes

  • 194. Divorce Explored: Alimony and Spousal Support Explained: How It's Really Calculate

    194. Divorce Explored: Alimony and Spousal Support Explained: How It's Really Calculate
    May 6 2026
    Why Your Alimony Number Is Wrong Before You Even Start There's a moment in divorce when everything starts moving fast. Conversations pick up. Decisions feel urgent. And before you fully understand what you're agreeing to, someone may put a number in front of you and ask you to sign. That's where the real financial risk begins. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen and Catherine break down what really goes into evaluating spousal support — and why most people are working from the wrong information long before they sit down to negotiate. Because divorce isn't just a legal process. It's a financial turning point. And if you don't have a complete, verified picture of your finances, you're not making strategic decisions. You're reacting under pressure. In This Episode: Why online calculators and AI tools give you fast answers — but not the right ones How courts actually evaluate spousal support (it's not a formula — it's 14 to 20 factors) What "need" and "ability to pay" really mean, and why both are harder to prove than people expect The most common financial affidavit mistakes — and how they've cost clients thousands Why self-employed and 1099 income is almost always reported incorrectly The danger of negotiating support in isolation from the rest of your settlement What happens when support ends — and why that question matters more than how long it lasts The 5 document categories you need before any support conversation can happen responsibly The Financial Reality: Many people go into the alimony conversation believing they already have a sense of the number — from a calculator, a friend's experience, or a quick AI search. But without verified income data for both spouses, a clear picture of actual household expenses, and an understanding of how support interacts with asset division and debt, you're not negotiating from facts. You're negotiating from assumptions. And once a settlement is signed, it isn't always easy to undo. Why Clarity Changes Everything: When you understand your full financial picture before negotiations begin: You know what you actually need — not just what you hope for You can defend your numbers when they're challenged You reduce unnecessary conflict by removing guesswork from the room You avoid the settlements that look fine on paper and fall apart six months later Financial clarity doesn't slow divorce down. It helps you move through it the right way. Start Here: If you're not sure you have the full picture yet, you're not alone — and you're not behind. You're at exactly the point where clarity matters most. The 5 documents to start gathering now: three years of tax returns with all schedules, 12 months of bank and credit card statements, pay stubs and bonus history for both spouses, business financials if applicable, and current statements for every account. That's it. You don't have to analyze anything right now. You just need the information ready before the decisions begin. Take the Free Divorce Financial Assessment at MyDivorceSolution.com Join the MDS Community for expert guidance, live Q&A, and ongoing support The Bottom Line: Alimony is not a calculator output. It's not what your friend received. It's a financial analysis built from verified income, real expenses, lifestyle data, asset division, and the actual ability of two households to function after divorce. Before you agree to a number — or waive anything — make sure you understand the numbers behind the number. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    38 min
  • 193. Divorce Documentation: Turn Chaos Into Court-Ready Proof

    193. Divorce Documentation: Turn Chaos Into Court-Ready Proof
    Apr 29 2026
    This episode of We Chat Divorce dives into a critical but often misunderstood reality of high-conflict divorce: truth alone is not enough—how you organize and present information is what ultimately matters. Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan are joined by family court strategist Courtney Gil Martin, who shares her firsthand experience navigating nearly a decade of post-divorce litigation. Together, they unpack why so many individuals feel frustrated in court despite having “proof,” and how disorganized documentation, emotional overwhelm, and lack of strategy can weaken even valid claims. The conversation reframes documentation as more than just saving emails or journaling experiences—it’s about building a structured, usable system that supports your case, your attorney, and ultimately the court. Courtney emphasizes the importance of creating a centralized “case hub,” where timelines, evidence, and financial records are organized in a way that allows for quick access, clear narratives, and strategic use. This approach not only strengthens credibility but can also reduce legal costs by making it easier for professionals to advocate effectively on your behalf. Karen and Catherine connect this concept directly to the financial side of divorce, highlighting a key distinction: not all information leads to a meaningful outcome. Emotional events, past behaviors, or even perceived injustices may feel important, but without a clear purpose or legal relevance, they can create distraction rather than impact. Instead, they encourage listeners to focus on what data actually supports their goals—whether that’s custody, financial settlement, or long-term stability—and to approach documentation with intention, not reaction. Ultimately, this episode reinforces a powerful message: confidence in divorce comes from clarity, not emotion. When you are grounded in facts—organized, accessible, and aligned with a defined outcome—you shift the power dynamic. You’re no longer reacting to the situation; you’re leading it. And in a system where time is limited and decisions carry lasting consequences, that level of preparation can make all the difference in protecting your future. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    31 min
  • 192. Divorce Explored: How to Prepare for Divorce Financially When Your Spouse Controls the Money

    192. Divorce Explored: How to Prepare for Divorce Financially When Your Spouse Controls the Money
    Apr 22 2026
    In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan unpack one of the most common—and costly—realities in divorce: financial blind spots within a marriage. Inspired in part by the broader conversation sparked by the popular book Strangers: a Memoir of Marriage , this discussion moves beyond the emotional narrative and into the financial truth many individuals face when divorce becomes real. Because while the emotional impact often gets the attention, it’s the lack of financial clarity that can have lasting consequences. Through real client experiences, Karen and Catherine reveal how often individuals enter divorce without a clear understanding of their financial picture. Unknown accounts, overlooked debts, and incomplete visibility aren’t signs of irresponsibility—they’re the result of financial roles that “worked” until they didn’t. The problem is, once divorce begins, you’re no longer living within the system—you’re being asked to evaluate, explain, and divide it. This episode reinforces a core principle: being financially supported is not the same as being financially informed. Without clarity, decisions are made under pressure, legal costs increase, and long-term outcomes can suffer. That’s why My Divorce Solution focuses on financial clarity before legal action—organizing, verifying, and analyzing your full financial picture so you can move forward with confidence, not confusion. About My Divorce Solution We Chat Divorce is produced by My Divorce Solution (MDS) — a financial divorce preparation company dedicated to helping individuals navigate divorce with clarity, confidence, and a strategic financial plan. Founded by Karen Chellew, Legal Liaison, and Catherine Shanahan, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA), MDS was created to solve one of the most common and costly mistakes in divorce: entering the legal process without fully understanding your financial picture. Divorce is not just a legal event — it is a financial transition that can shape your long-term security. Through the MDS Divorce Financial Portrait™, clients receive expert financial analysis, organized financial disclosures, and scenario planning to understand how different settlement decisions impact their future. This financial preparation often reduces legal fees, shortens the divorce process, and helps individuals negotiate from a position of knowledge rather than fear.If you are considering divorce or already in the process, you can begin by taking the Free Divorce Financial Assessment to better understand your options. You can also join the MDS Community for expert guidance, educational resources, and live Q&A events designed to help you move from uncertainty to clarity. At My Divorce Solution, the mission is simple: replace fear with knowledge so you can make informed, confident financial decisions during divorce. DisclaimerThe We Chat Divorce podcast (hereinafter referred to as the “WCD”) represents the opinions of Catherine Shanahan, Karen Chellew, and their guests to the show. WCD should not be considered professional or legal advice. The content here is for informational purposes only. Views and opinions expressed on WCD are our own and do not represent that of our places of work.WCD should not be used in any legal capacity whatsoever. Listeners should contact their attorney to obtain advice with respect to any particular legal matter. No listener should act or refrain from acting on the basis of information on WCD without first seeking legal advice from counsel in the relevant jurisdiction. No guarantee is given regarding the accuracy of any statements or opinions made on WCD.Unless specifically stated otherwise, Catherine Shanahan and Karen Chellew do not endorse, approve, recommend, or certify any information, product, process, service, or organization presented or mentioned on WCD, and information from this podcast should not be referenced in any way to imply such approval or endorsement. The third-party materials or content of any third-party site referenced on WCD do not necessarily reflect the opinions, standards or policies of Catherine Shanahan or Karen Chellew.WCD, CATHERINE SHANAHAN, AND KAREN CHELLEW EXPRESSLY DISCLAIM ANY AND ALL LIABILITY OR RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY DIRECT, INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL, CONSEQUENTIAL, OR OTHER DAMAGES ARISING OUT OF ANY INDIVIDUAL’S USE OF, REFERENCE TO, RELIANCE ON, OR INABILITY TO USE, THIS PODCAST OR THE INFORMATION PRESENTED IN THIS PODCAST. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    30 min
  • 191. Divorcing a Narcissist: How to Protect Yourself, Your Finances, and Your Future

    191. Divorcing a Narcissist: How to Protect Yourself, Your Finances, and Your Future
    Apr 15 2026
    Divorcing a narcissistic or high-conflict partner is one of the most emotionally and strategically complex experiences you can face. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, we’re joined by high-conflict divorce coach, mediator, and author Victoria McCooey, who shares what it really looks like to navigate divorce when manipulation, control, and emotional abuse are part of the dynamic. Victoria brings both professional expertise and lived experience—offering clear, grounded insight into how narcissistic behavior shows up in divorce, why so many people feel stuck or confused, and what it actually takes to protect yourself and move forward. If you’ve ever felt like you’re questioning your reality, being pulled in multiple directions, or struggling to make clear decisions—this conversation will help you understand why—and what to do next. What You’ll Learn: What defines a narcissistic or high-conflict partner in divorce Why many people don’t recognize abuse until they’re deep in it How manipulation and control show up during the divorce process The emotional and psychological impact of gaslighting Why clarity—not reaction—is your greatest asset in high-conflict divorce How to begin reclaiming your voice, confidence, and decision-making power You don’t need to have everything figured out—you need clarity. And clarity starts with understanding what you’re dealing with. At My Divorce Solution, we see this every day—when emotions are high and information is low, decisions become reactive. That’s why financial clarity is critical, especially in high-conflict situations. When you understand your full financial picture, you regain control of your decisions—not just your circumstances. Resources & Next Steps: Take the Free Divorce Financial Assessment Learn about the MDS Financial Portrait™ Join the MDS Community for expert guidance and support Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 min
  • 190. Divorce Explored: Before You Sign: What Divorce Financial Clarity Really Looks Like - Part 2

    190. Divorce Explored: Before You Sign: What Divorce Financial Clarity Really Looks Like - Part 2
    Apr 8 2026
    Episode Summary The most expensive divorce mistake is usually not legal — it's moving toward an agreement before the financial picture is complete, verified, and understood. In this episode, Karen and Catherine define what divorce financial clarity actually means and what needs to be in place before you sign anything. The Financial Clarity Gap Divorce financial clarity means having reliable answers about your financial situation that you can support with documentation — not a feeling, not a summary, not 'close enough.' The Financial Clarity Gap is the distance between relief-driven decisions and verified financial reality. Clarity reduces conflict: when both parties work from the same verified facts, resolution becomes more possible. The 4 Pillars of a Verified Financial Picture Full Scope: Every asset and liability — not just the obvious accounts. Common gaps include unvested stock options, pension valuations, deferred comp, and debts one spouse didn't know about. True Value: What an asset is worth after taxes, liquidity constraints, and risk. A $100K Roth IRA and a $100K traditional IRA look equal on paper — they're not. Equal on paper is not equal in spending power. Real Post-Divorce Costs: One household is becoming two. Support agreements based on memory — not real spending data — fall apart fast. Your future budget is the truth serum. Long-Term Impact: Scenario modeling shows what each settlement option does to the next 5, 10, 20 years before you commit. Model it before you promise it. In This Episode Why relief drives the most expensive divorce mistakes What the Financial Clarity Gap looks like in real cases The 4 pillars of a verified financial picture Why equal-on-paper can mean very different real lives Why even amicable divorces get financially messy The Before You Sign checklist Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    29 min
  • 189. Divorce Explored: Before You Sign: What Divorce Financial Clarity Really Looks Like - Part 1

    189. Divorce Explored: Before You Sign: What Divorce Financial Clarity Really Looks Like - Part 1
    Apr 1 2026
    Episode Summary The most expensive divorce mistake is usually not legal — it's moving toward an agreement before the financial picture is complete, verified, and understood. In this episode, Karen and Catherine define what divorce financial clarity actually means and what needs to be in place before you sign anything. The Financial Clarity Gap Divorce financial clarity means having reliable answers about your financial situation that you can support with documentation — not a feeling, not a summary, not 'close enough.' The Financial Clarity Gap is the distance between relief-driven decisions and verified financial reality. Clarity reduces conflict: when both parties work from the same verified facts, resolution becomes more possible. The 4 Pillars of a Verified Financial Picture Full Scope: Every asset and liability — not just the obvious accounts. Common gaps include unvested stock options, pension valuations, deferred comp, and debts one spouse didn't know about. True Value: What an asset is worth after taxes, liquidity constraints, and risk. A $100K Roth IRA and a $100K traditional IRA look equal on paper — they're not. Equal on paper is not equal in spending power. Real Post-Divorce Costs: One household is becoming two. Support agreements based on memory — not real spending data — fall apart fast. Your future budget is the truth serum. Long-Term Impact: Scenario modeling shows what each settlement option does to the next 5, 10, 20 years before you commit. Model it before you promise it. In This Episode Why relief drives the most expensive divorce mistakes What the Financial Clarity Gap looks like in real cases The 4 pillars of a verified financial picture Why equal-on-paper can mean very different real lives Why even amicable divorces get financially messy The Before You Sign checklist Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    28 min
  • 188. The Hidden Divorce: Why You Feel Stuck—and How Financial Clarity Sets You Free

    188. The Hidden Divorce: Why You Feel Stuck—and How Financial Clarity Sets You Free
    Mar 25 2026
    There’s a quiet kind of divorce that doesn’t start with papers being filed. It starts years earlier—when the relationship has already ended emotionally, but nothing changes on the outside. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan are joined by returning guest Karen Covy—divorce coach, attorney, mediator, and author—to unpack what it really means to feel “stuck” in a marriage. If you’ve been living in that in-between space—where fear, uncertainty, and obligation keep you from moving forward—this conversation will help you understand why. More importantly, it will show you what’s actually missing: clarity. What You’ll Learn in This Episode: What a “hidden divorce” really is—and why so many people are living in one The real reasons people stay stuck (it’s not just fear of divorce) Why not knowing your financial picture keeps you in indecision How misinformation from spouses, friends, Google, and AI can lead to costly mistakes Why divorce is not a binary decision—and the options most people never consider The role of financial independence and confidence, especially in long-term marriages How to make decisions using head, heart, and gut—not just fear Why clarity before action can dramatically reduce conflict, cost, and regret Resources Mentioned My Divorce Solution MDS Financial Portrait™ MDS Community (free support + live Q&A) Visit https://karencovy.com/ to find Karen’s resources When Happily Ever After Ends (book) Divorce Roadmap 3.0 Off the Fence Podcast If you’re questioning your marriage—or quietly feeling stuck—you don’t need to rush into a decision. Start with clarity. At My Divorce Solution, we help you understand your full financial picture before you take your next step—so your decisions are grounded in knowledge, not fear. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    42 min
  • 187. Financial Discovery in Divorce: What Most People Miss Before Settlement

    187. Financial Discovery in Divorce: What Most People Miss Before Settlement
    Mar 18 2026
    Most people enter divorce focused on legal steps. But divorce is ultimately a financial process—and the biggest mistakes happen before negotiations even begin. In this episode of Divorce Explored, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan break down financial discovery in divorce—what it is, why it matters, and what happens when it’s skipped. If you don’t fully understand your financial picture, you’re negotiating without the full story. They walk through real client scenarios, including undisclosed retirement accounts, missing financial documents, and investment portfolios with hidden tax consequences. These are the kinds of details that can completely change the outcome of a settlement—and they’re often missed. This conversation explains the difference between collecting documents and actually verifying them, why incomplete or outdated information leads to costly decisions, and how financial clarity creates confidence during negotiation. You’ll also learn where attorneys, financial planners, and other professionals fit into the process—and why financial preparation must come first. The bottom line: financial discovery is not a technical step. It is the foundation of every financial decision in divorce. If you’re considering divorce, in the middle of the process, or preparing for negotiation, this episode will help you understand what needs to happen before any agreements are made. Start with clarity before making decisions that impact your financial future. Learn more or begin with a free Divorce Financial Assessment:https://mydivorcesolution.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    31 min