What if the behavior you're trying to change is something you don't actually want to stop doing? What happens when responding differently leads to an outcome you weren't prepared for? And how do you learn to trust yourself when you're still figuring things out?

The results of the State of Self-Awareness & Change survey are in, and some of the most interesting discoveries came from the questions people answered in their own words.

In this episode, Deb shares what she learned from the survey, including how the results challenged some of her own uncertainty as a business owner. Then, inspired by three responses that caught her attention, she invites you into a different kind of conversation about the complexities of being human.

In this episode, we explore:

• What the survey revealed about self-awareness, personal growth, and familiar reactions
• How to recognize when a helpful behavior has gone too far without feeling like you need to eliminate it
• Why changing a familiar response sometimes means accepting an uncomfortable or unexpected outcome
• What it means to trust your own thoughts, feelings, and decisions, even when you don't have everything figured out
• Why understanding ourselves often leads to more questions, and why that might be a good thing

There aren't always neat and tidy answers when it comes to human behavior. Sometimes the most interesting discoveries begin with a question we haven't considered before.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Front Porch A space to sit down, talk through what's happening in your life, and explore it together. https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/the-front-porch

The State of Self-Awareness & Change Report Explore the full survey findings, including what participants shared about their experiences with personal growth and change. https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/awareness-study

A question to take with you: What are you still figuring out about yourself?

Stay curious, friend.

You know you say yes too quickly. You know you overthink. You know you shut down or start explaining yourself when you feel misunderstood.

You might even know exactly why you do those things.

And still...there you are doing them.

There's a difference between knowing your patterns and recognizing them while they're happening. And sometimes we spend so much time trying to understand ourselves better that we miss what's happening right before the familiar response takes over.

In this episode, a rainy drive through Dallas-Fort Worth and a memory of navigating with Mapsco lead to a different way of thinking about self-awareness. Because knowing the roads isn't the same as knowing what's happening on them right now.

In this episode:

• Why understanding your patterns doesn't necessarily mean you'll recognize them in the moment
• What an old Mapsco and the Waze app can teach us about self-awareness
• How protection strategies can become familiar routes we follow automatically
• Why recognizing a pattern afterward is still meaningful progress
• What may happen in your body before you say yes, shut down, overthink, or over-explain
• How your thoughts and the urge to fix or figure things out can be early signals, too
• Why body sensations are information, not instructions
• How noticing a pattern earlier can create more room for choice
• Why you don't have to choose differently every time for your awareness to matter

A question to take with you: What happens two miles before you do the thing you always do?

Got a question about your own patterns? Submit it at https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/askdeb

Resources mentioned: Beyond Awareness, a 12-week small group experience beginning October 20: https://www.mrscoachwatson.com The State of Self-Awareness & Change study: https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/awareness-study

You know what you want to say. You just don’t say it.

Maybe you decide it isn’t worth the conflict. Maybe you pull back because keeping the peace feels safer than letting more of yourself into the room. Maybe you’ve gotten so used to being easy, agreeable, or low-maintenance that disappearing a little barely registers anymore.

Sometimes shutting down looks like nothing is happening.

But sometimes shutting down is the protection strategy.

This episode looks at what may be happening underneath the urge to get quieter, smaller, or less visible, and why a pattern that once helped protect peace can eventually keep other people from fully knowing you.

In this episode:

• Why shutting down isn’t always about going blank or not knowing what to say
• How getting quieter or less visible can become a protection strategy
• What your system may be trying to protect when speaking up feels too costly
• How conflict avoidance can show up for Enneagram Nines, even when they know exactly what they think
• Why trauma can make shutdown responses stronger, and when additional support may be helpful
• What shutting down can feel like in the body before you fully withdraw
• How to tell the difference between choosing space and disappearing
• What this pattern can look like from the other side if someone you love tends to shut down
• Why one true sentence can be enough to give your system something new to work with

Got a question about your own patterns? Submit it at https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/askdeb

Resources mentioned: The Pattern Shift, the first step in The Unpatterned Method: https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/the-pattern-shift The State of Self-Awareness & Change study: https://www.mrscoachwatson.com/awareness-study