In this episode of The Connection Effect, host Bill Groner sits down with journalist, author, and bridge-builder Mónica Guzmán to explore a deceptively simple idea with profound implications: that the secret to enhanced inter-personal connection, curiosity, is not a personality trait. It's a practice.

Drawing from her work on depolarization and her lived experience navigating political difference within her own family, Mónica unpacks why judgment grows when engagement shrinks, and how misinformation about what's in other people's hearts quietly erodes connection.

Together, Bill and Mónica explore why certainty can feel soothing, why curiosity often feels risky, and why staying connected across difference matters not just for our relationships, but for the health of society.

This episode moves beyond abstract ideals to offer concrete invitations listeners can try in real life (in their own families, friendships, workplaces, and communities), and reminds us that connection begins with how we show up to ourselves before we meet one another.

00:00 A Message from Bill

00:57 Introduction: The Drive to Depolarize Society

02:21 Meet Mónica Guzmán

03:26 Monica's Motivation and Challenges

06:27 The Vicious Cycle of Judgment

08:24 The Perception Gap and Misinformation

10:32 The Importance of Engaging with Opposing Views

13:52 The Role of Activists in Bridging Divides

21:12 Curiosity takes Courage

25:25 Binary Thinking and the Need for Nuance

27:23 The Importance of Nuance in Personal Growth

28:22 Curiosity: Nature or Nurture?

28:53 Curiosity as a Practice, Not a Trait

31:57 The Power of Asking Questions

35:21 Navigating Political Differences with Friends

46:47 Hope for the Future

48:28 Final Thoughts on Anger and Self-Conversation

• Website: https://www.moniguzman.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/reclaimcuriosity
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moniguzman/?hl=en
• Book (I Never Thought of It That Way): https://www.moniguzman.com/book

• Join the community and conversation on The Connection Effect Substack connection.net/substack
• Questions? Guest inquiries? Email: podcast@connection.net

We are not finished products.

In this episode of The Connection Effect, host Bill Groner sits down with psychologist, researcher, author, and self-actualization coach, Scott Barry Kaufman to explore what it really means to explore and grow—not as a race toward achievement or happiness, but as a lifelong process of becoming who we are capable of being.

Drawing from his work revisiting and reimagining Abraham Maslow's ideas, Scott challenges the oft-cited "pyramid" of human needs and offers a more dynamic metaphor: a sailboat.

In this model, self-actualization isn't a final destination at the top, but an ongoing journey—one that depends on safety, connection, and self-esteem, which gives rise to exploration, creativity, and purpose.

Throughout the conversation, Bill and Scott explore why growth is deeply personal and often misunderstood, how rigid labels can limit human potential, and why growth and creating your best-self is less about producing something impressive and more about expressing what feels most alive within us. Scott also reflects on vulnerability, what it is to transcend, and the role of purpose as a compass rather than a destination.

This episode moves beyond self-improvement shortcuts to invite a more humane, patient, and hopeful approach to personal development—one that honors individuality, inner work, and connection as essential to becoming fully ourselves.

00:00 Introduction: The Journey of Self-Actualization

00:40 Meet Scott Barry Kaufman: A Modern Take on Maslow

03:47 Redefining Human Intelligence and Education

05:09 Exploring Self-Actualization and Creativity

10:12 The Sailboat Metaphor: A New Model for Growth

14:01 The Dynamics of Connection and Security

21:37 States vs. Traits: Understanding Human Potential

24:39 Measuring Love and Personality

25:34 Understanding Purpose in Life

28:42 Defining Transcendence

33:03 Self-actualization vs happiness and achievement

35:24 Practical Steps to Self-Actualization

37:07 Self-actualization is a Unique Journey

43:57 Hope for the Future

45:39 Final Reflections and Invitations

• Substack: https://www.beautifulminds-newsletter.com/
• Website: https://scottbarrykaufman.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ScottBarryKaufman
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/scottbarrykaufman/
• Books (Rise Above, Transcend, Wired to Create, Choose Growth and more): https://scottbarrykaufman.com/books/

• Join the community and conversation on The Connection Effect Substack connection.net/substack
• Questions? Guest inquiries? Email: podcast@connection.net
  
  
  

In an era of extraordinary division, we often focus on winning arguments rather than building understanding. But what if the key to our future as a society isn't about who is right, but about how we connect?

Hosted by Bill Groner, a former trial lawyer and mediator who spent decades representing over 10,000 9/11 responders, The Connection Effect explores the profound impact of being truly heard. Drawing from a career witnessing the costs of silence and the power of resilience, Bill sits down with researchers, thinkers, and practitioners to discuss their life's work, lived experiences, and how they relate to the science, soul, and practice of connection.

Join us as we explore how to bridge differences, listen deeply, and reconnect with ourselves and one another—especially when it feels most out of reach.

Add your voice to the conversation by following us and chiming in at:

connection.net/substack