In this episode Barry Long addresses the condition of humanity from a big picture view and presents the cause and cure of the human condition in a nutshell. Seeing the whole picture from a vast perspective he points out our tendencies to be creatures of the past, embodying past personalities and hurts when emotion arises. Barry describes this extraordinary insight that the triggering and arising of emotion is accompanied by a manifestation of a past personality, a past version of ourselves, the person we were when the emotion was created. This powerful insight is just one of many that Barry describes in this forensic analysis of the human condition.

'Emotions are like petrol. As soon as you oppose emotion it gets stronger, and you get emotional.'

Outline:

0:00 Emotional reactions and past hurts affecting present behavior. Emotional reactions from childhood can resurface in the present, taking on the personality of the past hurt. The self seeks to understand past hurt through insistence on wrong words in the present.

5:48 Past hurts and their impact on present reactions. Past hurts and defenses resurface in present circumstances.How people can offend others with their words and how to respond to such comments without getting defensive.

13:12 Emotions and the spiritual life. Importance of recognizing and addressing past hurts and insecurities in the spiritual life. Reflecting on past hurts and offenses hinders spiritual growth.

19:41 Emotions, vulnerability, and healing from past traumas. The unreliability of human opinions and the futility of worrying about what others think. On emotions and vulnerability in relationships. How past traumas, such as child abuse, can resurface in present-day love lives.

31:36 Sexual obsession and love. Love is not dependent on sex or thought, but rather on the connection between two bodies. The degradation of love and sexuality, citing the influence of bad company and the lack of proper guidance.

38:50 Spirituality and inner peace. Giving up the need to have the last word in arguments and to align with their true self, rather than living off their mind and emotions. The importance of dying to oneself and loving God above all, rather than loving oneself first. The importance of dropping thoughts to address emotions in the stomach. Power of stillness responsible for human existence, never moves or thinks.

46:34 Grief, love, and personalization of life. Rest into state of being, free from thought and emotion. On the nature of love and loss, arguing that everyone experiences it and it's not unique to personal relationships.

52:01 The nature of love and mortality.

Keywords: emotion, love, hurt, spiritual life, subconscious, loss, offense, self, energy, emotional, argument, love life, man, sexual excitement, stillness, life, grief, emotional reactions, personality, childhood

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We are excited to announce the creation of an extensive digital archive of Barry’s talks spanning 30 years. This repository contains an impressive 500 hours of video footage and 2,000 hours of audio recordings.

Over three years, a dedicated team undertook the monumental task of digitizing and modernizing a vast collection of historical recordings, some of which were stored on outdated formats like cassettes and magnetic tapes. Driven by the goal to preserve and safeguard this invaluable material, the project involved meticulous planning, cutting-edge technology, and a deep expertise in both analog and digital audiovisual

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'In this episode Barry Long talks about a key area of his teaching: the distinction between sex and love. He tells us how the implementation of this knowledge can produce a revolutionary change and transform your most intimate relationship into an ever-deepening expression of love. Knowing the difference between sex and love is profoundly relevant in the spiritual life, and this down-to-earth talk outlines the steps that can ultimately lead to the mystical union of man and woman.

'Sex is really love, only it has a selfish drive in it. Eventually that drive becomes the drive to master yourself and to transform your sexual drive into love.’

This talk was recorded at a public meeting, held at Cabarita Beach, Australia in 2000.

Related articles:
Pure love, emotional love
Making love
A new way to truth and enlightenment
Start over, get rid of the past

Barry Long's book:
Making Love

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Keywords: mind, clarity, awareness, truth, god, honesty, body, emotions, pain, life, nothing, silence, emotion, past, divine mind, beauty, thought, joy, sweetness, love.

Outline:

(0:01) Thoughts about past experiences can activate emotions of loss or absence, distracting from the present moment.

(7:32) Emotions and honesty. Thought is in the past, and thought can never lead to truth. Reflecting on past actions and past experiences.

(17:56) Consciousness and clarity of mind. The self, the troublemaker.

(26:27) Peace and self-awareness. The power of consciousness in seeing and being nothing, with the human mind seeking to project thoughts into the stillness. Mind connected to pain, distracted by emotional problems. Finding inner peace through feeling goodness inside, sinking into it. Descending into silence reveals truth, relief, and homecoming.

(43:42) Self-awareness and perception.

(52:18) Senses and their connection to the mind. Senses produce the universe and disappear with sleep or death.

(1:01:54) The nature of the mind and self. The mind's resistance to letting go of the self. The importance of being present and not trying to analyze or rationalize, as the mind cannot fully comprehend the depth of being.

(1:09:39) Purity, self-awareness, and inner peace. The importance of purifying the mind. Recognizing the source of problems is within, not outside. Grappling with emotional pain and insecurity, longing for comfort and connection with others.

(1:17:49) The importance of giving and clarity in relationships. Giving as the solution to problems, while also using honesty and clarity to identify and address underlying issues, such as unrealistic expectations. On the duality of expecting to win and fearing failure, leading to disjointed thinking and emotions. Asking others what they want, seeking to do something for them without causing unhappiness.

Excerpts:

You can only be joyous now. Whenever I am emotional, I am thinking about the past. Now, when you're thinking about the past, it means you're not here. You're not present. You're not aware of what's happening now. And if you're not aware of what's happening now, then you can't be aware of me because I'm only present now. So whenever you are emotional, then really we are not together. You see that?

I say to you, you will never learn where you went wrong. You will never learn from the past. The only way that you can learn is to be in the present...

In order to be honest, we have to be willing to feel everything, both the good and the bad. We have to go past our emotions, which can sometimes be the source of our unhappiness. And into a place where there is no opposite...

About this episode:

This episode is a part of the 1993 Gold Coast Talks. Five other episodes are available for subscribers exclusively on The Barry Long Podcast in the Apple Podcasts app.

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Keywords: spiritual life, intelligence, love, negative emotions, body, pure sensation, karma, consequences, human race, negativity, ignorance, worry, thinking, pure intelligence, sensation, chest, pain, self, moat, feelings, emotion

Outline:

0:00 Spirituality and maintaining innocence in the world. The importance of dedicating time to spiritual growth, rather than just attending events. Maintaining spiritual innocence in a world filled with insincerity and tensions.

5:21 The consequences of holding onto anger and resentment. The history of religion is marred by violence, betrayal, and ignorance. On holding resentment towards others. Anger, an entity that must be let go of.

12:27 Living a spiritual life and overcoming negative emotions. On anger, resentment, self-doubt and negative emotion. True spiritual growth requires overcoming negative emotions. Emotions and feelings are not good or God, but rather a form of thinking and imagination that can lead to worry and suffering. Looking at emotions and feelings directly, recognizing that they are not the same as God or truth, and to let go of them in order to find peace and liberation.

19:45 Inner reality and pure intelligence. On the relationship between thinking and emotions, and the importance of confronting negative emotions. The importance of pure sensation and stillness.

27:59 The role of the subconscious in shaping emotions and experiences. Ignorant self resides in belly, causing misguided decisions and emotions. Past ignorance and negative emotions, seeking to emerge from darkness into light.

34:44 Self-awareness and tension release. Self-doubt manifests as physical tension in the chest, throat, and neck, causing discomfort and difficulty speaking. The fear of abandonment. Internalizing societal expectations and beliefs. The nature of self and its role in causing unhappiness. Releasing tension in the body.

41:40 Sensation and intelligence in the body.

48:43 The journey back to the beginning. Uniting body and mind through pure sensation, overcoming mental analysis.

57:15 Spiritual growth and self-awareness. Distinguishing between real and perceived pain. The importance of detaching from worldly activities and cultivating inner awareness.

1:03:00 Spirituality and consciousness in a busy workplace. Helping others find their true identity as the Supreme Being. Barry describes his experience working in a busy newspaper office, feeling unattached to their job and able to perform well due to his transcendental realization. Barry describes their personal journey of spiritual growth and transformation, emphasizing the importance of devotion to the truth and God.

1:11:51 Spirituality, self-awareness, and taking action. Eastern teachings cannot be applied in the West due to negative self-obsession. The importance of taking action on desires and loving oneself to be loved. Taking action without overthinking. Responsibility and consequences.

1:18:46 Lust, love, and the internet. Internet is a manifestation of corrupted thought, leading to distraction and lack of spontaneity. The limitations of love and relationships in modern society.

Excerpts:

I am a Western Master. Wherever you look, you will find some master who has had an Eastern master or an Eastern background. It's very difficult to find a Western master. Western masters are totally different to Eastern masters. Although that might not be apparent. A Western master doesn't use Eastern terms. I don't use Eastern terms, unless I have to because there's no Western Anglo Saxon equivalent...

Karma means just repetition of the past. We all have our karma, which is consequences since we were born of all our actions.

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Keywords: spiritual life, emotions, truth, senses, love, gratitude, life, thinking, presence, anger, unhappiness, god, death, intelligence, past, aim, blockage, innocence, resentment, fight

Outline:

0:06 The power of acknowledgment in life. In relationships familiarity sets in when we stop acknowledging each other. Acknowledge the good in your life to attract more positivity, rather than dwelling on negative thoughts – what you acknowledge you get.

4:40 Embracing life's goodness and overcoming negativity. The importance of gratitude in life. God is only good and man-made negative emotions are a result of wrong choices and attitudes.

11:08 The dangers of excessive thinking and the importance of "looking" in life. Barry sings about the "place of the sinking heart." The importance of letting go of selfishness and wants to reach God. The past in us and its consequences. The importance of intelligence.

19:07 The importance of straight thinking and seeing the fact in life. Intelligence becomes consciousness through sensory experience, but thinking about past spoils it. Emotions cloud intelligence, causing circular thinking and delusion. The importance of seeing the fact and truth, rather than relying on emotional interpretations.

26:53 Emotions at work. On greed and unhappiness.

32:57 Spiritual growth and health. The aim of the spiritual life is to reduce selfishness and emotional thinking by revealing the truth inside oneself through gradual dissolution of old patterns. Spiritual life as a flow of psychic energy, blocked by unhappiness and emotion.

40:45 The impact of human ignorance on children. The impact of past experiences on the present and the difficulty of removing them. The need for a long process of self-cleansing and personal growth. Humans are born with a burden of ignorance created by their own minds and emotions, rather than a pure psyche. On ignorance and evil in society.

47:51 Letting go of anger and resentment. Giving up anger, resentment, and jealousy to find true love. Frustration – the inability to control others and get your way. Psychic possessions by resentment and anger in one's life.

55:24 Emotions and thoughts in spiritual life. The importance of being present in one's senses to avoid suffering, rather than getting caught up in emotions and thoughts. Acknowledging emotions can lead to disaster, as it perpetuates their existence, and instead, one should stop giving in to them and stay present in their senses. The importance of accepting situations as they are, rather than fighting or worrying.

Excerpts:

What you acknowledge you get – once in a relationship you stop acknowledging I would say every moment, every hour that you are together, once you stop acknowledging each other, this living death sets in, you start to become familiar. And the beauty and wonder that you had when your two bodies first came together gradually diminishes with the familiarity and the thinking that you know each other so that you can just acknowledge your work, acknowledge your problems, acknowledge your emotions...

Acknowledge the good in your life, and there's plenty of it – I don't care what's happened to you. If you stood in front of me, I would show you what was good in your life. And I would show you that you are not being worthy to life, honorable to life, because you're still depressed about your own selfish considerations. You are acknowledging the unhappiness in you. And therefore you draw more of the same to you. But when you acknowledge the goodness in your life, which is in everybody's life, this moment, then that goodness, somehow or other, and we can't say how returns to you...

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Keywords: God, love, man, female, self doubt, truth, pure sensation, intelligence, body, assertive, decisions, life, woman, emotional attachment, judgment, consciousness, spiritual, innocence

Outline:

0:02 The nature of woman and female. Woman has lost her natural state – the female in her – and must reclaim it to be truly happy and fulfilled. Woman has become disconnected from her true nature and has become possessed by her self to a large degree, leading to unhappiness and discontent. Woman must arise like the phoenix and reclaim her true nature, which is simple and beautiful, and this is what men are drawn to.

6:02 Woman desires a man who loves God enough to give up his self-doubt and assertiveness and love her.

13:18 Relationships. Woman can be truly loved only when a man is purely what he is, and that this requires the woman to stop trying to teach or instruct the man. The man should already know what comes between them, and that if he hasn't lived a spiritual life enough, he doesn't have to be taught. The difference between man and woman.

18:15 Love, relationships, and spirituality. Love is a quality, not a quantity, and cannot be "qualified" or measured. Woman never leaves man if she is loved enough – woman leaves for lack of love.

38:17 Living in the present moment.

45:31 Memory and aging. Remembering and forgetting. Stop remembering and instead rely on your body to guide you. Memory loss is a natural process as people age, and it's a relief to no longer have to remember everything. How innocence is gained as people age.

51:13 Awareness and evolution. Consciousness is the equivalent of nothingness. Involution focuses on inner world of awareness, dissolving old ideas for new ones.

57:19 Life, intelligence, and emotions. The true nature of life, beyond evolutionary concepts, and the importance of involution in revealing a life that never ends. Self-reflection in personal growth, particularly in love life.

1:01:49 Embracing body and instinct over mind. On the relationship between consciousness and body. Discovering intelligence through body's instinctive responses. The importance of living in the present moment, free from confusion, doubt, and fear, and of giving up unnecessary thinking and remembering.

1:08:06 Consciousness, life, and the importance of self-awareness. Most decisions are made by a "monitor" within oneself, rather than through conscious thought. The world created by humans is choking the earth and its inhabitants, while the blessed earth within us remains untapped. The importance of intelligence and directness in facing life's challenges.

Excerpts:

The female in the woman – this is extremely important to us men, as well as a woman. Because unless woman starts to be what she is, man can't be what he is. And that's been the difficulty because woman has lost what she is...

Woman really fundamentally doesn't really want to do anything but be loved. That's the true nature of woman. But then woman has become has become assertive, she's become emotional – if doesn't matter what the reasons are – she's become emotional, assertive, more and more, as I say, like a man. What she's got to do is to be the female that's in her, because the female in woman is quite natural. But then something has crept into woman, such as her pain or unhappiness, or the conditioning of pain and suffering, or the conditioning of not being loved in the way she needs to be loved, the conditioning of not liking and liking– which are just conditions, and all this has corrupted the pure body of woman, who she truly is...

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Keywords: intelligence, love, woman, life, relationships, penis, blame, gratitude, emotions, resentment, man, vagina, transform, interaction, orgasm, self knowledge, body, accuse, practical, earth

Outline:

0:01 Love, sex, and relationships. Understanding what you don't enjoy is key to wise relationships. On making love too quickly after meeting a new partner. A woman's vagina holds the emotional hurts from past relationships and lovemaking, causing pain and tightness. A loving man's penis is supposed to extract and transform this hurt in the woman's vagina, healing and transforming the emotional pain.

8:24 What’s love for? Love between man and woman is supposed to be a healing force.

15:22 Sexual intimacy and pleasure in relationship. The right penis can heal woman through love. The importance of mutual love and understanding in relationship. The body's natural ability to make love, without emotional or mental stimulation.

22:09 Personal responsibility and self-awareness. Personal responsibility for emotional disturbances in life. Begin the process of taking responsibility for life by recognizing when you blame or accuse others.

30:35 Four stages of meditation, with practical demonstration. The challenge of maintaining newfound intelligence in everyday life, as old habits and beliefs can act as a "disk brake" on one's progress.

37:51 Emotional prisoners and resentment. The importance of meditation and overcoming fear to live a fulfilling life. Emotions of resentment in the body can cause discomfort, confusion, and difficulty breathing. Examine resentment towards others, as it hides in the mind and harms self, not the other.

44:11 Gratitude and resentment. On the nature and interconnectedness of gratitude and love. The importance of gratitude to the "source" – God – for the good in one's life.

51:55 Meditation and spirituality. Pure sensations in the body. Life in body animates, but can't be shown, dies but never passes away.

59:47 Meditation and symbolism in the cosmos – the sun is the source of life, and the mother earth is like a mother who gives birth to all living things through the father's rays. The solar plexus as a sensitive point in the nervous system. The importance of stillness. Releasing emotional prisoners. Cultivating love and joy.

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Keywords: God, love, human race, man, woman, compassionate giver, thought process, body, consciousness, emotion, truth, river of life, human condition, minds and emotions, planted together forever, great mystery, human mind, sex, enjoyment, fantasizing

Outline:

0:00 Love, God, and the human condition. On the love between man and woman, and how it is a reflection of the love of God. The importance of love as the key to understanding and achieving unity among people, despite the prevalence of misinformation and division in society. Love is the sacrifice of myself for something greater than the ordinary.

6:25 Sex, fantasy, and intimacy. Sex should lead to love, not just personal enjoyment. The importance of giving up fantasy for sexual pleasure. Two magnets – male and female – that are perennially attracted to on another. On familiarity between man and woman. Love between man and woman is diminished as we become discontent and argue with our partner, rather than remaining in the beauty of our love. How to get out of the need for sexual fantasy.

14:40 What is psychic possession? How does it work? Breaking psychic possession and self-doubt. If we love each other – why are we moody? The psychic possession that affects the human race. Emotions are a form of psychic possession that can be broken through living the spiritual life and through making love. On breaking attachment to excitement, visualization, and fantasy to avoid psychic possession and self-doubt.

22:05 Life, death, and consciousness. On the dangers of vanity and the importance of accepting oneself as beautiful, without using it in a flirtatious way. Consciousness is key to understanding existence. Sentimentality and fear of death prevent people from seeing the truth.

28:07 Love, attachment, and self-awareness. Suffering in love is self-made due to attachment, and that love itself never breaks hearts – love never ever broke anyone’s heart. Emotional people seek warmth in love, but true love is not warm.

37:06 Love and relationships. On avoiding emotional attachment. On becoming attached to someone who may not be worthy of love. Love between man and woman is the source of greatest unhappiness – on giving up loving something that doesn't love us back. The importance of personal experience and recognition in understanding truth and love.

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